Not Quite So Many Doves
Blaine liked grand, romantic gestures. If you're going to say something, say it loud, and make it meaningful.
He and Kurt had kissed. They'd touched, flirted, and cuddled. But, Blaine thought it was time to show Kurt just how strong his love for him was. Just how much Kurt was worth to him, how much he meant. It was time to do something bold, daring, passionate.
Kurt was of an entirely different mind set. While he was all for the dramatic, whether it be in clothes or solos in Glee Club, when it came to romance he felt there was no need for pretext or grandeur. There was no need to do anything flashy or showy because the little, simple things were what showed the deepest love. From the brush of fingertips to a knowing smile across the room. When you are in love, nothing needs to be proved.
You know.
Kurt had told Blaine this. He'd thought he had made his point clear. He'd much rather have an intimate movie night in one of their dorms, in which there would be copious amounts of cuddling, kissing, and dizzying warmth, than anything fancy. Not declarations of love over loud speakers, serenades in town squares, or horse drawn carriage rides to expensive restaurants. He didn't need all of that. He just needed Blaine and Blaine's smile directed at him.
To Blaine, however, this was unimaginable. He loved the small gestures and warm smiles. Of course he did. They made his tummy all fluttery. But, he couldn't understand how Kurt wouldn't want to tell the world of their love, to declare it from rooftops. He had the most amazing boyfriend in the world and he wanted to show Kurt and everyone how lucky he was.
Tuesday came and went relatively normally. They passed notes in French class, flirted mercilessly at the Warblers meeting, studied American History in Kurt's dorm, where more kissing than actual studying was done, and they ended the day at the Lima Bean, drinking coffee and holding hands.
Kurt was mildly surprised that no one had said anything about two teenage boys holding hands and staring dotingly into each other's eyes. Mostly he was just grateful.
"So, how did your day go?" Blaine asked, smiling dreamily at Kurt.
"Blaine, you were with me most of the day."
"Yes, but you have three classes without me. I have no idea what went on in them. I need to know what happens when we are apart to make the separation anxiety hurt a little less." Blaine gave Kurt his best puppy eyes.
"You are ridiculous," Kurt sighed, "Well, in English Lit, Mrs. Warren assigned us a new paper…"
While Kurt was rattling off the events of his day, staring happily at Blaine's face, he failed to notice the orchestra setting up behind their table. Nor did he notice the gold cages of doves prepared to be let lose at just the right moment. (Yes, they were indoors. What Blaine lacked in logic, he made up for in creativity.) Or the choir dressed up in angel and cupid costumes. A wreath of red roses was set up on the table next to theirs. Which was ultimately what caught Kurt's eye.
"…And she gives us so much homework, Blaine, how does she expect us to manage it all?" Blaine nodded and, "hmmed," in agreement. He was too distracted by making sure everything was set up perfectly to articulate words. Blaine glanced at the roses long enough for Kurt to notice and follow his gaze.
"Blaine, what's-"
That was when the orchestra started to play, the choir started to sing, and Blaine pulled a giant sign out of seemingly nowhere that declared, "I Love You, Kurt!"
Oh my God, thought Kurt. What is he doing?
"Blaine, what are you doing?" Kurt's face was on fire, his eyebrows knit together in confusion, And… hurt? Now Blaine was confused.
"Being romantic?"
"No, you're not. Really, Blaine, doves?" He practically had to yell over the din of fluttering birds, violins, and costumed choir voices. Did Blaine even know him at all?
"Well, yeah. Don't you like doves?"
"Blaine," Kurt shook his head. He got his coat and put it on, ignoring the fake cupids trying to serenade him and the people in the Lima Bean that were either staring dumbstruck, or laughing. He grabbed Blaine by the wrist and pulled him out of the café.
"Kurt, where are we going? The cake with our picture on it is in there."
Kurt rolled his eyes, trying not to scream. Once they were at a safe distance from the coffee shop, he turned on Blaine, who could see the distress etched upon Kurt's features.
"Kurt, what's wrong? Didn't you like it?" he asked insecurely, pulling at Kurt's hand, asking for reassurance. He looked so honest and worried that Kurt's angry tirade froze on his tongue.
"Oh, Blaine. Honey," he pulled Blaine closer, looking earnestly into his eyes. "It's not that I don't appreciate the love behind…that. It's just, I told you I don't like those sort of showy, cheesy displays. And you doing that, it just makes me feel like you either don't listen to what I say, or don't care." Blaine backtracked, his eyes going wide.
"No, no, Kurt, that so wasn't my intention. Look," Blaine took both of Kurt's hands in his. "You know I suck at this. I told you that. All this romance stuff, it eludes me. At the same time, I thought that was what people in love were supposed to do. I didn't mean to ignore what you said. I'm sorry. I just, I love you so much, Kurt. I wanted to show you how much. I figured a romantic gesture as big as the love I have for you would get the message across." Blaine said it so genuinely and adoringly, Kurt couldn't be mad. He knew it came from a good place, a place of love. He just wished Blaine could have been more subtle.
"It's okay. I'm not mad." Blaine looked up at Kurt doubtfully. "Really, love, I'm not." To illustrate his point, Kurt pulled Blaine close and kissed him. Sweetly and deeply. "Come on. Let's go home."
The car ride home was awkward, Blaine obviously still felt guilty. He shouldn't. Kurt honestly wasn't mad anymore. How could he when his boyfriend cared so much?
How could he have been so stupid? He knew Kurt didn't really like extravagant displays of affection. He just thought, after they both had lacked love for so long, that Kurt would like him to show everyone how proud he was to be with Kurt. How completely unafraid he was to show everyone his love. He didn't mean to screw up what they had. He'd have to find a way to make it up to Kurt, somehow.
Kurt parked the car and leaned over to kiss Blaine on the cheek.
"I love you." He gave Blaine a beautiful smile and squeezed his hand. "Come on. We can make out a little before curfew if we go inside now." Kurt winked at Blaine and opened his door.
Blaine smiled.
Okay, so he hadn't screwed anything up. They were still in love. But he'd still have to find a way to make it up to Kurt. This time, with not quite so many doves.
The next day came and went relatively normally. Blaine cheated of Kurt's test in French, they whispered giddily to each other in Warbler's practice, went to the mall with Wes and David afterwards, and shared a milkshake, one cup, two straws.
They ended the day in Kurt's room, snug against each other, watching a movie that neither one was paying any attention to. Instead, Kurt's head was on Blaine's chest, arms wrapped around his waist. Blaine's nose was buried in Kurt's hair, arms wrapped securely around his shoulders, thumbs delicately rubbing his upper arm.
"See," Kurt sighed, "Isn't this romantic?" Blaine looked down at Kurt a bit sheepishly.
"Yeah, it is. I love you."
"And I love you, too. Even if you are ridiculously cheesy and over-the-top."
In pay back for that comment, Blaine began to tickle Kurt's sides, eliciting a high pitched giggle from Kurt. Kurt squirmed and tried to wriggle free unsuccessfully.
"Blaine stop, that tickles," Kurt sputtered out through laughter.
"Of course it tickles, that's the point." They both broke out into a fit of giggles. Blaine stopped tickling Kurt and instead began to kiss him slowly.
This was what Kurt had always wanted so desperately. To be loved and adored. To have someone to kiss and hold, who did those things in return.
Blaine sighed contently into Kurt's mouth. God, did he love him. He never wanted to break the kiss, but he knew he had to. Well, if he wanted to carry through with his plan. (Don't worry. There were no doves.)
"Kurt," he pulled back to look into Kurt's eyes, "I have something for you."
Oh no, thought Kurt. Seeing Kurt's expression, Blaine laughed exasperatedly.
"No, it's nothing like last time. You'll like it. At least, I think you will." He unhooked his arms from around Kurt and immediately missed the warmth. He sat up and crossed his legs. Kurt stayed lying on his side, but propped up his head to look up at Blaine.
"So, I didn't write this, obviously, but, it describes how I feel about you. And it's simple, too. I hope you like it."
Kurt smiled. He knew what was coming and he thought it was sweet of Blaine to sing him a song. He didn't know how much it would mean to him, though.
"Yeah, I'll tell you something
I think you'll understand
When I say that something
I want to hold your hand…"
Kurt felt his eyes starting to get wet and he cursed himself for it. He hadn't told Blaine about this song. How could he know?
He didn't.
He just knew Kurt's heart.
Blaine took Kurt's hand in his.
"And when I touch you I feel happy inside
It's such a feeling that, my love
I can't hide, I can't hide, I can't hide
Yeah, you go that something…"
Blaine brought his lips to their entwined hands and kissed them softly.
"I want to hold you hand."
Blaine finished the song and looked to Kurt for a reaction. It was completely silent, but not awkward. Kurt's eyes were shining, which Blaine thought, in this case, was a good sign. Kurt suddenly threw his arms around Blaine, whispering into his neck:
"You're perfect, you know that?"
Blaine smiled.
"Not as perfect as you. I'm glad you liked it."
Kurt looked at him, his blue eyes sparkling softly.
"I loved it. I love you."
Blaine pulled Kurt to him tightly and didn't let go for a very long time.
A/N: The lyrics were written out in the format of what I saw on a lyrics website, I really have no idea how they should be set up. Thanks for reading!
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or I Want to Hold Your Hand.
