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The Tale of the Attractive Prince and the Sexy Princess:

A couple of years ago there was a really Sexy Princess called Tweedle-Lou. Tweedle-Lou's real name was Emma-Rae but when Queen Frannie (Miss Fake) and King Rob*** (Mr Toy-Boy) married and had Emma-Rae, they – as it was – were so angry that Emma-Rae was the new 'thing' and the so called 'new cover story'; it left Frannie and Rob*** in the dust. They were so angry and jealous that they immediately started calling her Tweedle-Lou and locked her up in this grubby old mansion. And still to this day the stick with the story that the were playing with their "beloved" daughter when she fell in the river and drowned, everyone – yes, everyone – was brainwashed by this idea and indeed thought that The Really Sexy Princess was dead.

Tweedle-Lou sat in the attic looking down through the attic window and into the bush. 'Vhy am I locked up here,' Tweedle-Lou wondered. 'Vhy do I live in this grubby old mansion,' she cried again. 'It suxs, I can't get out – and I only get food and vater that the birds bring me.' Tweedle-Lou mumbled as she examined herself in a dusty old mirror. While Tweedle-Lou was grumbling; a Prince far off somewhere was having his own troubles.

'Father,' Prince Barney said, 'I don't want to have to marry just any damn Princess – they're all Looneys.' Prince Barney replied. 'It's the law Barney,' King Harold said. Prince Barney and his father, King Harold were having and argument. Prince Barney was very good looking and attractive – many girls had begged to be the royal bride. 'Well then son – you're right, let your old man tell you a secret; the best and sexiest ones and those young banished ones. Check out the Boommie Bush and you might find some Sexy Princess locked in some grubby old place.' And with those words from his father, Prince Barney rode away on his beautiful white horse.

Tweedle-Lou woke up one morning to hear slashing at the door of the grubby old mansion so she went to check it out. 'Vho's there,' she called in a sickle sweet voice. 'Me, Barney – Prince Barney,' answered a beautiful man's voice. Tweedle-Lou jumped out of her high-heels and let out a loud girly squeal. Then the door banged open and Tweedle-Lou caught sight of the attractive Prince Barney. And Prince Barney caught sight of the sexiest girl he had ever seen. 'Are you a Princess?' asked a stupefied Prince Barney. 'I'm not sure,' replied a smitten Tweedle-Lou. 'What is your name?' Barney asked. At this Tweedle-Lou dropped her smile and sounded like she had lost her voice for a while. 'M-my n-name i-is T-Tweedle-Lou,' Tweedle-Lou whispered. 'Really?' Barney asked in a deep voice. And then suddenly. 'Heck, I've got to run to save my neck!' And then the Prince cried. 'No! Alas! Alack!' He grabbed her dress to hold her back. And as Tweedle-Lou cried. 'Let me go!' The dress was ripped from head to toe. And as Tweedle-Lou ran up in her sexy underwear – all the Prince could do was stare. And then Prince Barney said: 'I guess it's time for me to go!'