.:For those who are reading I do not own Twilight or nor the rest of the saga. Please enjoy the writing you are about to read, And don't forget to review!!!!:.

Chapter one…

Bella's PROV.

I tried my best to have both of them apart of my life. But there are times where you have no choice but to pick only one. What was I to do. Edward, the love of my life, who always had a grip on my heart. My future, whom I was to spend the rest of my life with, and my dream that had finally came true. Or Jacob, my sun, when my days where cloudy and grey. My healer, when I was broken with only confusion to run my mind. And my friend, who was, and always will be apart of my heart and soul. This was too much for me. Just thinking about it gave me a headache. I got up from my bed and made my way to the bathroom hoping to find some aspirins.

"Dad!" I called out as I went through the shelf. Finding a small white container I sighed in relief.

"Never mind!" The pills were small making them easier to swallow. After taking two I headed back to my room. I couldn't help but fix my bed, even though I was only going to mess it up again. It was hard to keep the two out my mind, first Edward then Jacob going back and forth as they fought. No matter what I was doing or if I was asleep or not, they were constantly on my mind. Turning my dreams into the same nightmares every time. You would think that they would get less frightening but they only got worse as the two fought to the death. Edward was out hunting for the weekend, leaving Alice to watch over me. and Jacob… I sighed. Tomorrow was the day he would reply. Every Friday it was. After fixing my bed for the third time today, I sat on it, brushing my feet along the floor. A soft thump was made as my heel smacked something that was sticking out from underneath. 'what's this…' I thought leaning over to examine what it was. There in front of me lied an old shoe box, covered in dust and dirt. Slowly I grabbed it feeling a bit of weight as I pulled it up to the bed. Something was inside, and it was a bit heavy. Shaking the box I could hear the small things hidden inside. There were many, like cards or letters.

Blowing the dust and dirt off from the top I slowly lifted the lid, a bit curious of what was in it. My eyes widen just a bit as I seen the photos that lied inside . These weren't just any photos, they were photos of me and Jacob. From when we were kids making mud pies in the back yard at Billy's, to the day I moved to forks not to long ago. More memories ran through my head, yet they were different. These memories made me smile slightly, bringing a bit of joy to my mood. Picking up the large stack of pictures I began to go through them taking my time to look over each memory. The closer I got to the end the more guilty I felt. Before I found out Jacob was a wolf things were just so easy. I felt like I could breath without having to remind myself. I never-we never thought, because we always knew. About everything. We had nothing to worry about, other then when we were going to hang out. But now… things between us have slowly drifted away. And its all my fault. Warm salty tears ran down my pink cheeks, dripping over the single picture I cherished the most. My smile widen as I gazed into the photo. It was me and Jacob covered in oil as we laughed about how each other looked.

"…Ugh, look what I've done" I told my self placing the stack gently in the box as if I could break it or shatter it some how. Sliding it back under my bed I went over to the window. The tears continued to shed slowly, so I didn't waist my time whipping them away. Charlie must have still been downstairs, but I wasn't sure since I heard no movement. I wanted to check on him, to make sure he didn't have a stroke or a heart attack, but I couldn't let him see me like this. Sighing I decided to wait awhile. As soon as my tears stopped I would head down stairs.

Jacobs PROV.

The black pen between my fingers continued to tap as I thought about what I would write. I starred at the blank piece of line paper that lied in front of me on the kitchen table. My patients grew weaker and weaker by the minute as my knee bounced violently. Writing was something I despised, the only reason I was doing it was because of Bella. I began to argue with myself out loud getting angrier but the second.

"…this is stupid, we're not a bunch kids anymore!…" I paused for a moment then began to write down what I had just said.

Bells!

This is stupid, we're not kids anymore! And I feel guilty making Billy drive all the way over there just to give you some note, when you can just come over to the reservation like you used to!…

I lifted my pen and sighed as I thought about what I was going to put down next. Many things ran through my head making it harder and harder to concentrate. I could hear Billy on the phone talking to Charlie. And the pack out side arguing over something stupid. '…calm it Jake…' I thought to myself as I took a deep breath in. Releasing the air I pulled in, I forced myself to relax and continue what I had started.

A few minutes later I had finally finished my letter. I took my time folding it neatly as possible feeling the dents that were made by the small black pen. It had been months now since I've seen Bella. It was still hard to believe that things were going great before he showed up again. If she would've never jumped from that cliff that leach would've never had that stupid vision in the first place.

"damn!…" I yelled pounding my fist onto the table in front of me. Every one stared as the pack came in. 'great…all eyes on me…just what I need'.

"you okay Jacob,…something bothering you?" Billy asked as he hung up the phone quietly. He made his way over to the kitchen table where I was along with Sam. Worry and confusion filled their eyes making me feel stupid. Sliding the folded note off the table I stood up.

"…Here, this is Bella's. I'm going outside to the shed…if you need anything, just holler" I said keeping my eyes to the ground as I handed him the note. Once Billy took it, I made my way out the front door letting it slam behind me. No matter how hard I fought, no matter how hard I tried to explain to her, about how I truly felt. It wasn't enough…and it never will be by the looks of it. I jumped in the rabbit that sat in the shed, not in the mood to drive. All I wanted to do was sit there and think. Think about how things will be as days pass.

"UGH!" I groaned throwing myself back into my seat. Lifting my head a small piece of paper came floating down like a soft feather. Landing face down I couldn't help but pick it up. A slight smile slowly made its way to my face. Every bit of anger, every bit of pain, every negative feeling that I felt slowly drifted off into the cool air as nothing but joy fill me. The precious memory that lied in the palm of my hand made my day. Turning the same frown for the past few months, upside down. Seeing me and Bella covered in oil made me think, of how thing were before this chaos was revealed.

"Oh I how I wish things were the same…." I muttered to myself placing the picture in the glove compartment. Bella…my Bella….