Why hello there, I hope you enjoy this, personally I don't think Gwaine gets enough love so I thought i'd post a little something of my own creation

Don't own,

Don't sue,

thank you :)

We know of Gwaine the Knight, Gwaine the drinker and Gwaine the talker but what of Gwaine the love of some ones' life.

It had been nearly six years since I've worn the fine dresses, drank the expensive wines and sat quietly beside the tyrant that had ruled my existence with a steal knife but those days are passed and I am free.

Mud trails around the edges of my frayed trousers and my off white tunic has many a stain but I care not, my honey coloured hair is tied back tightly and is slightly greasy and my once porcelain skin has a healthy glow to it from long days in the warmth of the sun. I myself have never felt better.

I travel the roads and paths, simply because I can. In the dark nights there's a small tendril of fear, that one day, he may claim me again and drag me back into the darkness from whence I came. It's these fleeting moments that cause my restlessness now, I have stayed to long in a small village and I'm becoming known.

The villagers are greeting me by name, a name that is not my own but a name still, a smile of recognition with it; this is my queue to leave. To pass on to some other nameless place, becoming part of the background once more.

It was nearly nightfall before I had made significant headway on my journey and although I was sure of the area I was not fool hardy enough to carry on after darkness had fallen. I choose a small nook beside a tree stump and sat my pack down. After recovering the blanket from within I curled myself up in its folds and let sleep overtake my thoughts. It didn't take long for the nightmares to come and I fought the demons in my mind for nearly an hour before I awoke with a sharp cry. The sound echoed eerily through the empty forest. I waited on bated breath, silently praying to whatever deity was listening that no one had heard. A few minutes passed and nothing changed so I let out the breath I had not known I was holding and tried to relax again, knowing that sleep would now evade me I could still gain sufficient rest before I began again at daybreak.

It was only minutes after sun up that I set off again, my breath rising slightly in front of my face as I walked on. If my calculations were correct by midday I would have reached the village of Gilead. That was to be my next stop. The sun held little warmth that morning and despite my forced march I stopped to dig out my woollen hat and buried my head inside its warm depths, it had been a present from a friend in Ealdor, I had stopped there only briefly but long enough to know that I shouldn't have lingered. Hunith, her name was. She was what I had always envisaged a mother to be and it had hurt to part from her but it had been necessary for alls sake.

The town was of medium size, nothing special to the eye. The houses clustered close together, children playing outside. Women hurrying about their chores and men ogling them as they did so. A deep sigh escaped my mouth and a chill racked my limbs. Winter was fast approaching and I would have to find an agreeable town before it truly set in. Gilead did not hold much hope of this but nevertheless I was here and I could do with a hot meal and a bed for the night at the least. I set forth for the Tavern; I had enough gold to keep me in some small comfort here.

It was hot and noisy inside the tavern, men grunting loudly to themselves over their beer and women tending to them. Perfect, the more action, the easier is it to slip through the net. I stepped slowly through the throng with my eyes on my destination, the bar. I was within fingers breadth of it when a large elbow bowled into me and I fell sideways into another man. I weighed barely anything in comparison to the man but all the same he roared in outrage. I scrambled quickly to my feet, apologising profusely, I knew better then to mention I was pushed. He leered down at me, his bug eyes wide in rage, demanding at the top of his lungs that I had robbed him of his drink. Which of course I hadn't. The stench of his breath made me recoil, it was enough to make me feel a little drunk myself. He had continued bellowing at me all this while but to what I was somewhat oblivious, so I offered to compensate him for the loss of drink and ordered him a tankard from the barmaid who was watching the scrimmage as if this was the highlight of her entire dreary lifetime. She scurried off quick enough and on her return I chucked her some coins, not caring if I overpaid. The man was not entirely happy but it was enough to quell his anger for the time being. I ordered myself a small drink and bartered a small room for the night too. I would have to share the room with others but it was a bed. I had my short sword in my pack if anyone where to give me any bother. The company in the tavern was tedious and it was yet to reach its peak so I set out to find somewhere quiet outside to enjoy the clear nights sky. I had not been settled long when three gentlemen arrived into town, they were clearly outsiders and held no real knowledge of the layout of the town. They had not spied me from my vantage point and I chuckled quietly to myself. The gentlemen were exchanging arguments as to which way they should travel through the town to find the inn. Two of the gentlemen, both bearing dark hair though it was difficult to tell much else in the fading light seemed to be teasing the blonde. The speech and diction of the blonde told me a different story; he was well spoken and arrogant. A noble at least. On closer inspection their horses were of fine sturdy build and their tack of the highest quality, they weren't just nobles. Tack of that standard such as the blonde's steed would only suggest royalty. The blonde decided the way they were heading and simply set off.

"You're going the wrong way," I mentioned in an offhand manner. His head whipped around, trying to source the voice.

"Who said that? Show yourself," the two dark haired lads laughed and I winked at them from my vantage point. They could clearly see my small form nestled amongst the hay bales but the other could not.

"I said it" and again his head whipped around. Searching. Deciding enough was enough I clambered down slowly. "I said it." I declared brushing myself down. "You're going the wrong way. If you want to find the Inn, take a left and you'll find it on the end there and next time take counsel from your subjects first, before you plough into a decision head first, save us all the trouble, Your Majesty." His mouth dropped open in shock and the two dark haired lads too, looked shocked. Of course they couldn't work out how I knew they were nobility. "And don't bother giving me the speech about how I can talk to you like this, this isn't your kingdom and Cenrid's not a fan of, well, anyone so you hold no law over me. Now if you'll excuse me, I have things to do other then guiding lost block headed princes around."

"I like this one!" Roared one of the dark haired lads. "Come, we'll buy you a drink"

"No, thanks, " I said inclining my head. "You need not buy my silence; I shall keep your secret. You have my word."

"How do we know we can trust you?"

"That's just it. You don't" I answered and walked back towards the Inn, leaving them all dumbfounded.

It was dark outside before they made their way into the inn, and in the dim light I could make out their features much better. The blonde was tall and he was certainly of noble blood with a finely featured face and a well-built frame. Next came a gentlemen of the nearly the same height, he was slighter, his hair longer then the others and with facial hair but it was rather fetching. He was quick and seemed to be talking rather a lot much to the annoyance of the blonde. Lastly came the slightest of the three, his short dark hair was almost black and he had a slight stoop. His demeanour suggested that he was not that of noble birth and he seemed slightly awkward in himself. They certainly were an interesting trio. I watched them further from my corner seat and toyed with the empty flagon that sat in front of me, it had long since been empty but it was something to do. The intricacy with which it had been made captivated me for a few moments before my thoughts were interrupted when the awkward lad sat down next to me. I looked up, querying his intrusion. He didn't apologise nor even answer my question but gushed about how I had cheeked the Arthur. Apparently the man was still fuming about it, especially as I was a mere boy, I did not bother to correct him. I commented on how petty it was that he was still angry and we bantered for a good few minutes, he was very likeable. His name was Merlin and he was the manservant of Arthur, the other companion was a man named Gwaine. Gwaine was of noble birth but not a knight. He struggled with the idea of his nobility and chose to drink his life away in whatever tavern he came across. Merlin told me of Gwaine with a touch of sadness in his voice. It was then that he begged me not to tell of their presence. Which of course I told him, I would never do, I had given my word.

"Yes, but you see Arthur doesn't really trust that because well, how can I put this, you're just very young, and well, your word doesn't always mean the same, when you're, well, young"

"Merlin, truthfully, answer me this, how old do you think I am? I shall not be offended I am just curious"

"Well… err…"

"Honestly, I won't bite" I said laughing

"Well Arthur thought maybe fourte- fifteen?" He squinted sideways as if expecting to be hit, and was shocked as I laughed at him.

"I suppose I should be offended but I wont hold it against you Merlin, but you are wrong, very wrong"

"Oh- well, how old are you then? It's just with your hat and you're so small, you just well look a lot, you know" A small blush on his cheeks, for some reason.

"Never you mind, it's rude to ask someone their age anyway" I answered sticking my tongue out at him, it was childish, yes but he roared with laughter and I laughed along with him.

We changed the subject and were laughing about his adventures when a brawl broke out at the bar and drew both our attention. Gwaine and Arthur had had the displeasure of meeting the gentlemen I had had an altercation with earlier. Casper was his name, the local blacksmith. He was a solid man; easily triple the breadth of Gwaine and a good foot taller. Gwaine was easily besting him but Casper soon had the locals on his side and even Gwaine had to think twice. I chose this moment to interact, slipping through the main throng, I stood to the edge of the Casper and handed him another pint, claiming to help him ready to fight, but I then feigned to trip and instead cut the twine that held his trousers up as he lurched forward seeking to break Gwaines neck. He stumbled forward and fell flat to the ground, passed out drunk. I just smiled to myself and turned and left the throng and headed toward my assigned room, chuckling to myself. I knew I shouldn't have interfered but it was worth it for the look on his face as he plummeted to the ground.

The room was dank and dingy, three small beds cramped into a small room, no lock on the door and a small dark window in one corner but I suppose it was better then the forest floor and I had paid for it, I might as well experience it.

I didn't have to wait long for the other occupants to join and it was with slight shock the door opened to find the three travellers standing outside.

"Oh good gracious, are we ever going to be rid of you?" Commented Arthur

"Well hello to you too" I muttered under my breath. Gwaine and Merlin shared a look of amusement; Arthur quickly settled into the bed furthest from the door and turned his back on us. Gwaine took the remaining bed and Merlin set about laying blankets on the floor. "Here" I said gesturing to the bed, "I'm leaving at first light, it'll be easier this way, then I wont have to wake anyone up when I leave, unless you snore and then I will most certainly kick your ass when I leave" I stated with a laugh, Gwaine snorted loudly and then burst out laughing too. He reached over from his bed and ruffled the top of my woolly hat. I scowled playfully at him and laughed again. Merlin checked four more times before ascertaining that the bed really was his, I laid my pack down as a pillow and using the blanket from my pack curled into a ball and closed my eyes.

Dawn broke cold and silent, the floor had done nothing for my aching muscles but Merlin looked extremely cosy, despite the fact that his feet were nearly hanging off the end of the bed. I folded the blanket quietly and stowed it back in my pack, I took one long last look around the room and at the three men in it before I turned and slowly opened the door "Psst. Kid. You know, I never did catch your name." I withdrew my head quickly from the corridor to see Gwaine awake and sitting up. "I never gave it." I said with a smile. "So where you heading next?" I shrugged, I hadn't really planned that part and I couldn't stick around after last night's antics. "Well, if you're ever in the Camelot area, come see us, I'll even buy you a drink or two, a thanks you could say, after last night" He seemed genuine enough, so maybe I could take him up on his offer. "Well I figured I'd head west next any way, so I guess I could drag myself from away from my pressing schedule and stop off there." I grinned at him. My heart fluttered a little and I blushed slightly. He winked and then turned over and lay down. I shut the door quietly and leaned my head against the wall. I couldn't afford to get attached, I just couldn't.

I exited the Inn quietly, taking care with the heavy wooden door. The morning was still fresh, the sun barely creeping into view on the clear horizon. Taking a deep breath I headed out towards the edge of town, setting myself a steady but purposeful pace. As I passed the edge of town I noticed I was not the only one awake. Casper and his friends from the brawl were lurking around. Mumbling amongst themselves. I kept my eyes down, focusing on my path. "My, my, that was a quick stop, wasn't it lads" his companions roared in answer. This was not good. I quickened my step ever so slightly. Grasping the hilt of my short sword in one hand, it had been too long and I was rusty, I had not kept up my practise and I now was to fall foul of it. "Where you off to in such a hurry?" They began closing ranks around me and I could only but halt "Any one would think you'd been up to something, aye? What say you to that lads?" They again roared, I couldn't make out if they were louder then the blood pounding in my ears. "Not so brave now are you" They were now circling me slowly, I tried to calm my breathing and remember my training but it was slipping from me, as fear took over. I slashed out in desperation and ran for my life.

I didn't get far before I encountered them again, they were cleverer then I had given them credit for. They also knew the land better then me and it wasn't long before I was once again outwitted. They overwhelmed me by sheer numbers and it wasn't long before I was left bloodied and bruised on the path. They took my pack with them and my coin purse. I was badly hurt, my vision swam from the large cut on my forehead and each breath was like another knife to the side. My left arm was lying in an awkward angle, I could not move my fingers and a cut to my right calf meant I was not going anywhere fast. I allowed a few tears to escape and again I prayed to a deity I didn't believe in that I would pass swiftly into the abyss and not endure.

It was several hours after my departure that Arthur and his companions were ready to leave. Gwaine had a bad feeling in his gut, Arthur and Merlin commented that it was probably all the ale he had drunk but in their hearts they knew that wasn't it but they were at too much unease to voice it. On leaving the village Casper and his friends were too busy rummaging in a familiar pack and laughing heartily to themselves to disturb the three and this did nothing to ease their worries.

I desperately wanted to cough, my throat rasped and my body convulsed as I fought the urge with every fibre of my being. Every breath shot arrows into every pore of me, burning searing pain coursed through my left arm as it flopped uselessly beside me. Small spots of black were beginning to appear in my vision as I fought against my urges. How long I had been fighting this urge was a mystery I couldn't move my head from its position, I could only see part of the track and the floor from where I lay contorted. A sudden cough caught me off guard and I cried out in pain, my ribcage engulfed in a blazing inferno and it spread through my veins, carrying with it such pain that even more large black spots appeared suddenly and my vision swam, the ground beneath me began to shake, thunder seemed to roll overhead and I could hear angels calling out to me, telling me that it was going to be alright and I believed them and I let go.

I felt I was floating, rocking back and forth ever so gently. Whistling slightly in my ears told me I was travelling but my mind was too hazy to work out anything more. Angels talked above me, whispering of nothing but it was a comfort to hear their voices and I smiled up at them. Gradually the rocking motioned stopped and the angels voice changed, deepening and lightening, moulding into other sounds altogether. The angels let me drink from a cup; I could feel the cool liquid quench some of the fire that had once scorched through my being. It settled heavily in my gut, pulling me further away from the angels voice, I didn't want to go, they couldn't make me, no! I wanted to se my mother, she would be there, she would take me hand as I has always dreamed and lead me toward happiness. The heaviness was spreading through my limbs, tearing me away from the dim light above, and began to settle deep in my chest, I pushed hard against it and it halted but refused to withdraw, I pushed and pushed with every fibre I could muster and it began to slowly recede. So I pushed even harder still and it began to retreat faster and faster till it was nearly gone, with one final effort it disappeared and I was even closer to the light I shouted out to my mother to find me but the words caught heavily in my singed throat and I coughed and spluttered heavily, my gut wrenching so hard that I hurled my upper body forward in hope of easing it.

It was then that my eyes opened; blearily I looked out into the light, blinking, gasping for air, my head spinning heavily. A pair of hands grasped at my shoulders and gently laid me down onto something soft. I still struggled to draw breath but my head began to clear and I could see straighter. An older man stood above me, holding my hand in his own, stroking it softly "hush now, nice deep breaths" I took his advice and gradually the tightness in my chest lessened and although I could not draw breath without pain it was not as debilitating as it had been. "You gave us all quite a scare, it was touch and go for a while but I think you'll be alright now" He smiled down at me nodding as he did so.

It was a few days before I was able to breath properly again, Giaus the elderly man had had the tasking job of healing me when Gwaine had brought my dying form to him nearly a fortnight ago, both Arthur and Merlin has come dashing in moments later. All three were regular visitors during my incapacity. They were heavily relieved to see me alive although Arthur tried not to show it.

"How come you were dressed as a boy?" Merlin has asked one day, all four of us were talking together although Arthur was not too keen. "I mean you had me and Arthur completely fooled" Arthur made to protest but Gwaine shut him up quickly.

"Well you assumed and I just never bothered to correct you" I said with shrug and winced when it tightened my chest. "You on the other hand saw through it didn't you, but what I was wondering was how or when even? What gave me away?" I questioned Gwaine

"When you tripped, your hat shifted, and I saw your hair, that and your eyes and no facial hair was kind of a give away" I blushed slightly at this.

"We never did get that name" Gwaine smiled slightly looking straight into my eyes, his stare was so powerful that I couldn't hold it for long. I bit my lip, should I tell them and risk being sent back or lie and know that I had lied to the people who had saved my life. I took a deep breath; I had made my decision for better or for worse.

"My name is…" I took another deep breath, did I really want to do this, really. Spill it all out, right here, right now. "My name-"

"-Goodness! You're all still here, be gone with you, the poor girl needs rest, I'm sorry sire but she really does need rest, look she's gone all pale again, Merlin I leave you in charge of her for less then an hour and I come back to find her on deaths door, I ask you." Giaus stood over her; arms folded and stared at the three who quickly took heed and exited hastily. I couldn't face it anymore and burst into tears. "Now, now, it can't be that bad, come on, you're just tired, you need rest"

"Oh Giaus how can I tell them? They'll send me back they'll have too and I couldn't bear it but I don't want to lie to them" he shushed me gently and sat beside my cot

"It is a tough situation I know but they are all good men, they have hearts, I do not think they would be so quick as to send you back without hearing you out. Never mind, for now, sleep on it, things will be better in the morning."

"So I should tell them?"

"Sleep, or I'll make you take some more medicine" We shared a smile and I lay back down to sleep.

Gwaine sat opposite me, his eyes bore straight into me and I did all I could to avoid his gaze, Gwen had helped me into a simple dress and with the assistance of Giaus too I had been placed in a chair, Giaus stood to my left, just in case. Merlin sat slightly to my right and we were waiting on Arthur before I could proceed. When he arrived he was twitchy and on edge, he refused to sit instead he paced behind the chairs. I started by asking that they did interrupt until I had finished and by explaining that this was hard for me, I had only told one other living soul, Giaus, and he had guessed ninety percent. "My name is Emmelenna. My Father is… is… a cruel and loathsome man. They say that he was a kind man but with a quick temper but my mother died during my birth and he has hated my existence because of it. I was never allowed outside, my room consisted of a chamber pot and a bed. I have never been taught to read or write, I was a puppet of my father's device. I was only brought out for special ceremonies or to show off. If I misbehaved I was whipped until I passed out. I have never had a true friend. I spent my days living off scraps, chained to a wall. My cell had no window, there was no light save for the single candle I was

given at night. My father held no love for me. Ever. The only people I ever came into contact with where my jailers. Two men, Elthor and Jack. I have spent my life in a cage, please, please do not send me back…" I looked up at the three with tears in my eyes. Begging them silently.

"I know of your father… he… is a cruel tyrant, I never knew he had any children. But I will never let you back there, no one deserves that kind of treatment, not an innocent child, not even my wildest enemies would I think to treat that way" Gwaine stood up as he spoke. I looked to Merlin next who shrugged and grinned "seems easy to me, besides Gwen's been lonely lately, you could stay with her" and finally to Arthur, his head was down and he looked deep in thought. "It puts us in a difficult position, your father is very powerful, his forces could easily crush Camelot."

"Arthur you can't send her back th-" He held up his hand to silence Gwaines outburst.

"But providing he never finds out, I suppose we could make some room for you here, so long as you promise to not be annoying, I've got my hands full with these two, I don't need any more nuisances running around" He half smiled and made his excuses and left.

"So, when are you going to buy me those drinks then Gwaine?" I asked with raised eyebrow

"Oh no, I'm just a lowly knight, I can't be seen to be getting royalty drunk now can I"

"You wish, I could out drink you any day!"

"Oh yeah? Well we'll see about that then wont we, Princess" He bowed extravagantly, winking and left the room laughing when I couldn't chase after him.

Merlin just laughed and helped me up and back into the cot. It was good to be safe, for now.