Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel unfortunately so don't sue me!

Summary: "Feelings are nothing but a weakness", "Never get attached", "Family life's not for us". Those sentence fully respect Zack's, X5 599, life line. The oldest X5, the big brother is an essential character always there to save whoever needs to be saved even in the most desperate cases. He's the one character that perfectly fits the hero suit yet, he's the most mysterious according to me. He keeps hiding behind a cold mask, putting distance between him and the rest of the world. However, can you keep a mask on your whole life? Can you play the part of someone else forever? Aren't there moments when you just need to let go?

Setting: Right after Zack's found Max in 2019 in "411 on the DL". This is kinda gonna be a glance (more than a glance actually) at Zack's life in parallel with the show.

Review please...

Chapter I: One annoying little brat!

Zack's POV:

Ridding on my black bike at really high speed, I'm trying to sum up the earlier week's events. Max hasn't changed a bit: just as foolish, unconscious as she used to be. She is starting to get attached to that Logan character. What a jerk that guy is to think he could be able to deal with Max and her heavy past! He has no idea what he's getting himself into! Oh, well! Max's a big girl, she'll soon figure out that Mr. rolling his smart-ass around is just slowing her down, I hope.

I know settling down is no good for any of us although I have to admit it's really tempting. My unit and me are going to be chased for the rest of our life. It was not the life we had dreamed of, I guess, but it's still better than being in that hell place, behaving like the nice little doggies they want us to be. At least out here, we have a choice: living a chased life or dying. If I ever have to go back there, I swear, I'll kill myself and make sure my body's such in a bad shape, it'll be useless to them for any of their experiments!

Just the thought of Manticore makes me angry, I hold on to my bike tighter and unconsciously go even faster. I feel the engine throbbing beneath me. I know where I'm going, finally where I want to go, Phoenix, Arizona. It's not that I didn't want to go to Seattle to see Max, it's not that. I really do care for Max, even back at Manticore, I already knew there was something special between us but I've been meaning to go to Phoenix for a while now.

Now, that I know Jondy, Brin and Max are fine, I have somebody else I have to check on. I just hope she hasn't got herself in trouble too, I'm tired of those younger sisters who never listen to a single thing I say! They keep messing around and I'm the one that always gets the pleasure of saving their stubborn little ass! Girls... I've never had any trouble with Krit or Zane, they move whenever I tell them to, well, Syl too, she's probably the only girl that still takes my orders without questions.

I'm almost there. My watch says 11:00. No way, she's gonna be home at that time! I know where to find her. Here's another thing that bothers me: they've all become so predictable, they've all taken little habits. They have a job; favorite bars and even friends! Guess Lydecker's men aren't what they used to be, I'm sure it can't be that hard to find a couple of his dear lost X5s. Well, they almost found Max.

I'm in Phoenix now; I take left turn, then a right, then a right again. I slow down, passing in front of the entrance of a bar. The panel says Feria. I know she's in there, drinking and laughing with her friends. I can't help having an impression of deja vu: Max at the Crash along with her bike messenger friends or Jondy in the bar in which she works near the Golden Gate Bridge. I sigh, both because I'm desperate at my sisters' irresponsibility and because sometimes I wish I could be the same... feel normal from time to time.

I go round the bar and decide to park in a dark alley behind it. The second I stop my engine, I hear noises: voices, someone falls on the floor. I keep silence and decide to go take a look unnoticed.

Three guys look pretty upset, kicking this other guy that's on the floor. Apparently, he owes them money. I see the back door of the bar open in a long creaking and see a frail feminine figure step outside. I roll my eyes and sigh. Can't keep her nose out of other people's business, can she?

"Oh, come on, guys! Be nice!" I hear her say putting all her weight on her left hip, "How do you expect him to give you your money back if he can't even stand up" she sighs.

"Mind your own business lady!" one of the three guy mumbles.

I completely agree with him. I wish she would just listen to him and go back in. Unfortunately, dear scatterbrained X5 396 never misses a chance to draw attention to herself. It's got be in her genes or something and I can almost start feeling sorry for the three thugs, almost!

She walks towards the guy on the floor, yanks him to his feet and tells him to get back in. Obviously, she knows him: she's just called him Ron. Once the guy's back in the bar, she turns around and walks towards the bar's back door too.

One of the guy grabs her left arm and says:

"You're not getting away with this lady! If he can't pay us then, we'll just have to supply ourselves with what we have. In this case lady, you"

While he's talking, his two other friends are circling around her like a bunch of vultures. They're looking at her from head to toe and nearly dribbling. I can't help myself from rolling my eyes and sighing again as I look at the look on her face. She actually looks glad that she's gonna be able to kick their ass! I can't believe it!

"Allow me to serve you Sir!" she says, grinning, "One more thing, stop calling me lady!" she scowls.

She grabs the one that was holding her arm and propels him against the guy on her left. Both of them smash their head against the wall and fall to the floor, right in front of the third guy's wide opened eyes. He tries to say something but just stutters. I gotta say I'm really impressed too. She did that using her hyper speed but my eyes barely got the time to see it! She's always been the fastest of our unit but that... she's improved... seriously. Oh, well, poor guy!

She rushes towards him, grabs his right arm and turns it around so that it's stuck behind his back. She's behind him now and whispers in his ear something I can hear though I'm far away, using my hyper sensitive hearing. She's telling him to let her friend alone, and that if they'd come back she'd assume that the first service wasn't good enough for them and make sure that they could never come back a third time.

As soon as she let him go, the guy ran away along with the two others back on their feet. Pathetic ordinaries I thought. Without a word, I watch her walk back towards the bar's back door. Suddenly she stops and takes the previous stance she had right before saving her friend: hip to the side and her hand on her hip. Without even turning around, she says:

"Hope you enjoyed the show Zack"

A smile forms on my lips but I quickly get rid of it as I walk out of the darkness that had hid me till then. I intend to seriously reproach her her attitude and her lack of discipline. She turns around; the grin on her face has also disappeared. She's now put on her soldier face, the one that's motionless, but I can still note a bit of irritation in her tone as she talks and looks up to me.

She's a bit smaller than the other female X5 I know. I guess that's what makes her lighter and explains why she's so fast and the highest jumper I've seen until now. I suspect she has more feline DNA than any of us, you can see it from the way she moves.

"I guess that pretty much reflects your way of living: watching, putting a distance between you and whatever might happen in this freaking world!" she says looking up.

No way, I'm the one that should be getting mad, not the other way around! I hate it when she does that!

"Your behavior was outta line soldier!" I bark out stiffen.

As I start stating the behavior a proper soldier should've had, she rudely interrupts me. I hate it when she does that too!

"Here come the reproaches!" she drawls rolling her eyes, "I forgot I wasn't talking to Zack but to X5 599! Well, excuse me but your conversation's just boring, so if you don't mind I'm going back in!" she says turning around again.

This is too much! I grab her arm and violently turn her around. Now, I'm pissed! I look straight into her eyes. Her soldier face's gone. I can see tears forming in her eyes. I'm sure I must've looked pretty stupid just then. I'm holding her arm; my mouth's open because I was about to say something. We stayed like this for what was just half a second but seemed like a long minute, looking into each others eyes trying to guess what the other one was feeling.

Then, she hits me and that was so unexpected that I fell to the floor... these girls are not so predictable after all!

"How could you do this to me?" she almost yells.

Any way you look at it, she's managed to turn the whole situation around: now, I'm the one looking up to her and she's the one yelling! She stands up on top of me, one of her boot on each side of me. I raise my head up and my eyes go along her harmonious body shapes.

She's wearing low hip blue jeans and sleeveless white top a bit transparent: I can see the lacework of her bra through it. My eyes go further up and I meet her furious hazel green eyes surrounded by brown curls as she's looking down to me. Her curls look more like Original Cindy's then Max's. I never doubted one of her parents was black anyway. Her tan skin doesn't lie about her origins. Once again, Manticore had done one hell of a job!

"What the hell are you talking about?" I ask standing up but still bewildered.

"You've been gone for over five months! I haven't heard a word from you! You could've been killed, recaptured or I don't know what else!" she screams out.

"Noah... I've been meaning to come back for while" I stammer.

What the hell am I saying that for? I don't have to justify any of my actions, she has to! It's true that since I've had my eye on Noah (six years now) I hadn't been away for so long without at least calling her to make sure everything was fine. But still, that's no reason for me to grovel the way I am, after all, I am the CO!

Noah lets go another sigh of irritation and another heavy silence falls between us.

"So, how are the others doing?" she finally asks.

"Max's fine. She got into trouble, Lydecker almost got his hand on her but now she's fine. Brin and Jondy are OK too" I say.

"You found Max?" Noah muses "That's why... you've been away for so long"

I nod. She looks perfectly calm again; she even kinda looks sad. I finally ask:

"How 'bout you? How are you doing?"

She glares at me and answers:

"Fine, not thanks to you. How long are you staying?"

"I dunno, till another one gets in trouble I guess..."

"Come on" she sighs, "Let's go to my place, you'll tell me all about the girls"

"Hey, no problem, go have fun with your friends, I d..."

"No, I'm tired anyway" Noah interrupts me again!

"You really ought to stop doing that!" I say, "Interrupting people I mean"

"Yeah, whatever" she shrugs, "And you ought to get a life!"

Then she does another unpredictable thing: she hugs me! I was so surprised at first I didn't respond to it. Then I started putting one arm around her waist and the other one against her back, clutching her too.

"I missed you" she whispers to my ear.

"Missed you too" I hear myself say.

I just can't seem to get mad at her for a long time! I don't know how she does it but I can't stand it. It makes me seethe; yet, her touch calms me down. I know something's not right. She's different, I can feel it. Noah never sounds so dramatic and I've never seen her cry or near crying before.

"What's wrong Noah?" I ask still hugging her.

I feel her body jolt and she pulls herself away from me. She's trying to hide herself but I know tears are running down her face.

"Ginna's dead" she finally blurts out.

Suddenly I can picture the red haired 26 year old on the living room couch doing her nails and asking me whether or not my super vision allowed me to see through clothes like superman. I remember answering no but she didn't look to convince as she said that even if I did it was better for me not to tell anyone.

"She was shot three weeks ago coming out of a club she was working in" Noah's hushed voice brings me back to reality.

Ginna was her best friend and her roommate. She had allowed Noah to make more money working in clubs as a sorta driving force by dancing and making sure people danced with them too. Ginna was an incredible dancer; she could dance just about anything, so she trained Noah. It was amazing what these two could do. They'd be hired in different sorta clubs and bars (salsa, African, etc...) and they would just bring out the whole place alive.

"I should've been there. If I had, I would've seen it coming; she'd still be alive. But I had to stay home because of one of those seizures again!" Noah says.

I see her body jolts, announcing another wave of tears. I come closer to her and clutch her like previously. She tries to muffle her sob on my shoulder but finally decides to let go of everything she's tried to keep inside these past few weeks.

Yeah, that just reminds me that keeping them alive is not my only responsibility. Or at least, it's not what Noah wants. She was waiting for me to come back, to just be there for her. Most of my siblings like to deal with emotional business alone but with Noah, it's different, things are always different with her anyway. I'm different around her too.

I understand that now that I'm holding her in my arms and whispering words to comfort her in her ear.

A/N: So... did you like it? Do you think I should keep on? OK, let's say 4 reviews and you just might know the rest of it. I don't care whether there are flames or not, just review pleeeeeeease! Love ya for it! Any suggestions are welcomed too! Don't forget English's not my native tongue so there has to be vocabulary mistakes or grammatical or whatever but there has to be huge mistakes anyway, tell me please! Maybe I should have a beta reader... Anyone interested?