If I were an angel I would cast

away my wings and halo

forever

Just to spend one more moment

near you...

...I would forget the music of every sunrise

to just once more hear you sigh,

I would laugh in absolute joy at the

irony

Of the angel who gave away his divinity,

For all of eternity,

To feel the warm glow of earth-bound love,

If just for one single moment.

-From The Crow by James O'Barr

-x-

The first time I ever heard you play was when I was still at the House of Fianna.

I was still broken, shut away from the world, living in my own existence where anything that I didn't like could simply disappear if I ignored it.

You looked all tough and intimidating, but the sound from the piano gave away a sweet, chilling sound, the kind that makes your eyes water and your body shiver.

Such a light sound.

Such a pure sound.

Have you ever heard that pianos reflect who they're being played by?

Maybe you should've listened to my music more. The you might've understood.

Even if you did, you'd probably brush it off.

That was the kind of person you were.

-x-

You hated martyrs.

You even said it yourself; those who sacrifice their own lives never brought peace to anybody.

And yet, your last moments of breath; what were they like? You died becoming the kind of person you despised the most.

No, you died being the kind of person you despised the most.

Because, Elliot, you're noblel. Noble, and brave, and self-sacrificing... I never really understood how you could do that.

You made the choice that I never could have done.

I'm none of those things.

Because I live in the darkness. You live in the light. That's why we don't understand each other.

We can't understand each other, Elliot, because I don't want to drag you into the darkness with me. I don't want you to be trapped where I am.

I guess it's a little to late for that, huh?

-x-

Vincent told me your last words, "I'm sorry, Leo."

Why are you apologizing? It's my fault, it's all my fault, you idiot! Everything...everything's my fault. You wouldn't have died if I just...

Didn't exist.

Don't you think it would've been better?

If you were here, I know you would've yelled or snapped at me to stop saying such stupid stuff.

But you know it's true.

-x-

I'm sitting at a piano right now, Elliot.

I never knew why you liked playing piano. Your father made you learn it, but I noticed that you liked it. The piano, I mean.

I wrote Lacie. But the way you played it-the way you play anything-made my heart beat faster.

Because that's how you play, Elliot. You play who you are.

And you have such a pure sound.

The kind of sound that just made you forget who you were.

I don't know about me, but I tried to play like you...

Though I think people unconsciously noticed the difference. They would always know who was playing the piano at Lutwidge.

People are animals, too. They know how to stay away from danger.

Except for you. Idiot.

-x-

One hundred years. Don't worry, Elliot, I'll wait forever if I have to.

-x-

I'm not an angel.

Because if I could, I would give up the lives of every single person in Isla Yura's mansion,

Just to hear the sound of your sweet, clear, and terrifyingly dark piano.

If just for one single moment.

-x-

Endnote:

The piano keys are cold. Colder than the blood that runs through my fingers.

Won't you warm them up for me...?