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Tonks woke up for the first time in her life disappointed it was her birthday. She had nobody special to spend it with. She sighed wishing the man she loved, loved her back. Was there something wrong with her? Was she ugly? She questioned herself while examining herself into her bathroom mirror. She could change her appearance at will so there shouldn't be any problems in the look department. Why didn't he love her? Hell, why didn't he even like her? Every time they were in the same room he would stay away from her, but not completely ignoring her because once or twice she caught him staring at her intently from across the room. ..Every time she stayed with Sirius after Order Meetings hoping to run into him he would vanish. She knew Remus lived with Sirius, but why she never saw him was unusual.
'He's avoiding me' She said in conclusion for the 100th time. Tonks shook her thoughts away and got ready for work. Tonks concentrated a moment and her hair became her signature bubble gum pink.
Remus woke up that morning feeling unusually happy. It was Tonks's birthday. He planned an entire surprise birthday for her at Number 12 Grimmuland Place. Remus got Kingsley to schedule a fake emergency order meeting telling Tonks to arrive at 7pm, until then he and Sirius decorated while Molly slaved away in the kitchen. Arthur, Kingsley, Mad-Eye, Dung were all still at work (apart from Dung) and they would arrive a half hour before Tonks did; however Tonks's parents could not be invited because of Sirius, nevertheless Remus was excited for the first time in a long time. He could already picture the look on her face. Her beautiful face; her heart shaped face, pale skin and bright blue or green sometimes purple eyes. Her hair short pink and spiky the thought made him smile, but he snapped out of it.
'He's your best friend's little cousin.' He muttered.
'What?' A voice asked behind him.
Remus spun around. It was Sirius.
'Nothing.' Remus said quickly.
Sirius shrugged 'Okay. Anyways for Tonks's party tonight can you meet her at her apartment instead and bring her over?' Sirius asked.
'Why?' Remus asked.
'Oh you know. The ministry has decided to monitor everything their co-workers do all that jazz.'
'Why do I have to do it?'
'I would, but I'm a mass murderer and I have a 10,000 Galleon price on my head. Molly has to cook and the rest of us don't know Tonks well and have to decorate anyway and Molly said you should do it.' He said the last part really fast.
Damn Molly he thought, but deep inside he felt that bubbly feeling in his stomach. Trying to ignore it he made himself some coffee.
'Fine.' He said.
'Why don't you like her?' Sirius asked?
'Who?'
'Tonks.'
'What?'
'Why don't you like Tonks?' Sirius asked again.
'What do you mean? Of course I like her.' More than I should he added to himself silently.
'You always leave when she sticks around. She asks about you, you know.' Sirius said
Remus felt the bubbly feeling again. 'She asks about me?' He asked trying to sound innocent.
'Yes, she asks me where you go and why you always disappear or how you always stay away from her as possible. She says if she didn't know any better you've been avoiding her. Why? She's a nice girl. 25 years ago she would have been just your type' He added winking.
Remus pretended he didn't hear Sirius's last sentence. 'When do I pick her up?' Remus asked changing the subject and ignoring all the questions hoping Sirius didn't say anything; however knowing Sirius the odds of that were slim.
'Hey you never answered my question. Why are you avoiding her?'
'I'm not.' Remus replied simply.
'Moony, she's hurt. Be nice.' Sirius said 'And pick her up at 7.' He added before leaving.
Remus sunk into one of the Black's ancient kitchen chairs, burying his hands in his face. Suddenly secretly thrilled beyond belief, but nervous as he could get.
6:50 came fast. He apparated to Tonks's flat in muggle London.
Meanwhile Tonks just arrive from work. Merlin, it was hectic today. 16 muggles murdered; 250 muggle memories to be 'obliviated'... She collapsed onto her couch and closed her eyes. Not 10 seconds later was there a knock at the door.
'Bloody Hell!' Tonks exclaimed. 'What now? Who the Hell- Remus! Oh hello.' She said awkwardly.
'Hey Tonks.' He muttered looking at the ground, not sure what to say next. He felt like some stupid school boy. He looked up at her and saw she was looking at him curiously. 'Sorry to disturb you, but…well-'
'Wanna come in?' Tonks blurted out.
'Oh umm sure.' Remus said taking a step into her house and sitting down on her couch. Tonks sat down next to him.
'Look I'm sorry about how I've been acting.' He started.
Tonks couldn't believe it. Remus Lupin was sitting on her couch apologizing. She gaped open mouthed at him and then she grinned.
'Its just hard for me to meet new people because I'm so scared they wont accept me as who I truly am and I don't wanna hurt anyone.' He finished.
'You think I wont like you because you're a werewolf?' Tonks said suddenly laughing pulling him into a hug. He breathed in the scent of her. She smelt like strawberries and vanilla. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment. Finally they pulled apart, but they were holding hands. They looked into each other's eyes. Her's were blue and his were a light brown with a hint of green. She smiled.
'Remus, I love you' His heart skipped a beat. 'Everybody loves you. We love you. Don't you ever forget that.' His heart fell a little bit at the last part.
'Thanks.' He said gratefully, but it sounded quite lame. There was an awkward silence. He wanted to tell her he loved her, but he couldn't bring himself to do it.
'I almost forgot Happy Birthday, Tonks' He said and pulled out a small box out of his jacket.
'Remus you didn't have-'
'Let me put it on. Turn around' he said.
He took the necklace out of the box and put it on her. It was a small heart which changed color according to what color her hair was. The heart turned bubble gum pink as soon as it hung on her neck.
Tonks gaped for the second time in less than five minutes. 'Thank you.' Was all she managed to say, flustered. Remus smiled.
'Wanna come to Number 12?' He asked. Tonks nodded, beaming. They held hands and both of them felt the electric current zoom through their bodies. Then they disaparated to Sirius's.
The arrived at Sirius's and Remus immediately let go of Tonks's hand. Her heart fell a little. He held open the door for her and she walked into the house. She was greeted with a big yell of 'SURPRISE' from all around the room. She could see Molly, Arthur, Sirius, Kingsley, Dung and Mad-Eye all in different parts of the room all zooming towards her to give her a hug. Sirius was first kissing her on the cheek and hugging her tight enough to squish her. Molly was next giving her a big hug and kissing both of her cheeks, then came the rest of the group they all kissed her cheeks apart from Mad-Eye who nodded at her and wished her a Happy Birthday.
They all sat down at the kitchen table eating a delicious meal made by molly and drank firewhisky. Remus ended up beside Tonks. Dung left not long after the party started; he said he had a important 'business' opportunity. They all said bye except for molly who just glared. Finally, midnight approached Molly, Arthur and Mad Eye left together. Then it was just Tonks, Lupin and Sirius.
'Little Moony did a nice job didn't he?' Sirius asked
'You did all this?' Tonks asked in disbelief.
Lupin nodded awkwardly not looking her in the eye.
'Moony you didn't tell her? Figures, you were always the modest one.'
'Look what he got me.' Tonks said showing Sirius the heart shaped necklace. 'Watch' She changed her hair color and the necklace changed as well. Sirius gave him 'the look'. Lupin couldn't look at him.
'Well I'm off to bed. You two have a nice night.' Sirius said suddenly.
Lupin panicked 'wait what?'
'Night.' Sirius said. 'Happy Birthday, Tonks.' He said before exiting.
'Night.' She replied winking.
Tonks poured herself and Lupin another glass of fire whisky. There was a long awkward silence. Neither of them knew what to say. They were to preoccupied in their own thoughts to say anything to each other. 'She's your best friends little cousin. I'm old broke and dangerous! I'm an outcast! A fucking werewolf. She deserves better…'
'Does he like me? Why is he being nice all of a sudden? What would he do if I kissed him? Why does he care so much that he's a werewolf? We all love him. I love him…'
Tonks poured herself another shot of fire whisky and downed it (for courage). Then Tonks crushed her lips against his. It took Remus a minute to register what was going on. Then he kissed her back. She straddled his lap while he ran his fingers through her hair. Lupin opened his eyes and saw her hair was flickering from color to color. Red, blue, orange, yellow, green, purple, green, pink, red, purple, green, blue…. He smiled into the kiss. Tonks opened her eyes and pulled away looking hurt.
'What?' she asked. 'Why are you laughing at me?'
'I'm not. Its your hair its flickering from color to color-' He said feeling foolish. Then without another word he started to kiss her again. Their tongues battled for dominance both tasting strongly of fire whisky. Tonks wrapped her hands around his neck and her legs around his waist. Remus stood up and walked to the living room with Tonks wrapped around him. They kissed each other eagerly. Savoring the taste of each others mouths. Lupin put her on the couch and layed down on top of her careful not to put too much weight on her. Tonks reached for the buttons on his shirt and began to take it off. She kissed down his neck and back up again to his mouth. She peeled his shirt off and tore her eyes down to his chest. His perfect chest. It had scars all over it and a few tattoo's. She ran a finger lightly over a particularly large scar. She saw from the corner of her eye Remus winced.
'Oi, I see you two have gotten pretty close?' A voice behind them said. Tonks and Lupin froze. They knew that voice too well.
'Shit.' Tonks heard Remus mutter.
'Moony I knew you still had it in you.' Sirius said and they heard Sirius walk away chuckling to himself. Lupin sat up and started to put on his shirt.
'I'm sorry Tonks.' He said.
'I'm not.' She said cheekily and tried to kiss again. Remus turned his face away.
'Tonks, I'm sorry. We can't.'
Tonks crossed her arms. 'Why?' She said pouting. 'If this is about Sirius-'
'No its not. I'm old and poor and a werewolf. You deserve better.'
'I don't want better. I want you.' She said stubbornly, but Lupin wouldn't listen. He stood up, button up his shirt and left.
Tonks didn't know whether to cry or not. She stormed into Sirius room.
'WHY?' She shrieked.
'What?' Sirius asked.
'He left.' She said angerly letting a loose tear fall.
'I'm sorry. I'll talk to him tomorrow. Just let me sleep.' Sirius muttered.
'You better.' Tonks said angrily. With that she apparted home.
Remus was walking down the road. He had nowhere to go until Tonks left. Why did he kiss her back? He knew there were going to be large consequences. Then just to top it all off Sirius had to catch them. Absorbed in his own thoughts he didn't realize the sun was starting to rise. He had sub-consciously walked to Godrics Hollow. He decided to visit James and Lily. He walked to the graveyard and saw someone was already at James and Lily's gravestone. The figure looked oddly familiar. The man was dressed all in black kneeling at the gravestone and he looked like he was crying, sobbing actually. The man realized someone was watching him, he turned and Lupin saw it was no other than Severus Snape. Snape jumped up and grabbed his wand.
'You will tell no one of this.'
'It's okay .I miss them too.'
'Them?' Snape spat on James's side of the gravestone. He snarled. Then without another word he apparated, Lupin was left alone by Lily and James's grave. Remus contemplated for a minute and came to the conclusion Snape loved Lily. In his school days everybody knew Snape had a crush on Lily, but for him to visit her grave after all this time?
