Perhaps, he should have listened when his mother had told him that he was selfish. Perhaps, he should have listened when his mother had told him that he wasn't someone meant to love. Perhaps, he should have listened when the woman he loved most screamed and pleaded with him to stay.

But, of course... he had not listened to their pleas. His heart weigh heavy in his chest, but there was nothing he could do to reverse the hurt and pain he had caused to not only himself, but also to the one person he loved more than family. Fifteen years had flashed by him and he knew (-oh how he wished he did not!) that she had found a husband that was not named Blaze of the Ketsu clan. He knew (-oh the tears he had shed at the knowledge!) that she had a child, now thirteen years old. His heart clenched within his chest tightly, but he had nothing to cling to, no one to cling to.

"I'm sorry." He wished he could whisper it to her one last time, desperately ached to hold her within his arms again, because he couldn't stand the thought of her in another man's arms, but she was-! She was in someone else's arms and she was happy! Happy and yet here he was, a silent scream never leaving his lips as he held on tightly to his agony, because he absolutely refused to let go of the memory of the pink haired medic that had come strolling into his life, because he absolutely refused to forget the love that he had felt for such a delicate and strong willed creature, because she had been able to replace the hurt that he had been feeling since he was just ten years of age. But... she loved another. He had ruined the love she had for him. There was no way to regain such a thing once it was lost.

If he had one last hour with her, he knew that he wouldn't even use it. He would hide away from her, would only watch her for that last hour, to permanently engrave the memory of her happy smile into his brain. Because what use did tearing open such old wounds do? Because how could he deserve such a sweet, sweet gift when all he had done was caused pain and sufferings? He didn't know. He didn't know and he didn't want to find out.

Even so, he could never forget the love that she had shown him. He could never forget the way she made love to him, couldn't forget the tears that she had shed for him. And he didn't want to forget them either, because his pain, his agony and his grief, were feeding her happiness. And that was all he had left. He had no clan (they were so torn and broken that none of them could truly ever repair themselves enough to be called a family), he had no hope, he had no Sakura...

"I'm sorry." He would whisper to the moon sometimes. And sometimes he swore that she had heard his apologies and his tears, because his twin would sometimes say that Sakura missed him (oh what irony and cruelty life played in this game). And sometimes he thought that things might be able to return to how they were before all of the suffering, but his mind was always changed when he caught glimpses of her child running around the village. Happy. She was happy. But he knew that the happiness Sakura and her child felt was only artificial, but artificial was better than what he was. He was nothing and is agony. He was agony and he is misery. He was misery and he is torment. And the only thing he could do now was say "goodbye."