Please review. It's been a while since I updated SSBM TECHNIQUES AND MOVES, I know, but I got grounded AGAIN. I made a new smash story though. How much does the idiot Dr. Mario actually know about his patients?

Chapter 1: Yoshi

I do not own any of the Super Smash Brothers. Nintendo owns them.

Author's comment: This chapter will probably make you dumber. Probably the others will, too.

A bored Dr. Mario sat alone in his chair, looking out the window of his office. His eyes slowly drooped down, but then he immediately jerked his head up and snapped his eyes opened to prevent falling asleep. But then, it happened again. His eyes began to slowly droop down...this time, his tired position was interrupted by fierce yelling The door flew off and out the window, shattering the glass. Yoshi, in kicking position, was revealed at the door holding a gun and a black sweater.

He ran toward Dr. Mario and put the gun to his head. "Don't move!" he shrieked. "DON'T MOVE!" he repeated three seconds later, though Dr. Mario had not moved at all. He stared in terror at Yoshi, shaking and beads of sweat sliding down his forehead.

"H-hello, sir, dinosaur thing," he stuttered, leaning his head back as Yoshi's approached it. "Wh-why are you here? What do you need?" He took a pillow out of nowhere and used it as a shield for his face.

"Doctors are doctors," Yoshi sneered, pushing the gun through the pillow until he felt Dr. Mario's forehead. "You're supposed to help me."

"With what?" Dr. Mario wondered nervously, thinking more about helping himself.

"I think I might have anger management," admitted Yoshi, his position unchanged.

"Well, I'm not sure how you made it so secretive," said Dr. Mario, before thinking better of anything that might get Yoshi angrier.

Yoshi's probably too dumb to get it anyway, Dr. Mario thought.

Yoshi sat down on the chair across from Dr. Mario and set his gun down on a third chair that really shouldn't have been there considering psychiatrists were probably supposed to be two-person only. "Any wrong moves and you're dead," Yoshi spat. "I came here to get my problems solved, not to get my head covered in lemons."

Dr. Mario would've normally argued at lack of coherence, but since dinosaurs seemed dangerous even without guns, he chose to simply respond with the word, "What?" in confusion.

"Oh...uh...sorry...never mind. Just help me. Give me the medicine or whatever, or tell me how or whatever you guys do."

"Fine. My first suggestion would be to have something to replace the person who gets you mad, so you'll get used to it. Like this!" he added, holding up a lemon. Yoshi grabbed it and held it in his hand. "All right, I'm going to say a few things to you." Dr. Mario stood up, no longer very nervous. "When you start to get mad, instead of killing me, squeeze the lemon! All right...you're stupid!" Yoshi was squeezing the lemon and his face became red. "You're an idiot! A complete retard who has no life!"

Yes, it's working! Thought Dr. Mario, seeing Yoshi about to explode.

Finally, Yoshi...burst out laughing? This left Dr. Mario in confusion. "Those are the most pathetic insults I've ever heard! Did you even have any friends in school?" Dr. Mario grew embarrassed and furious as Yoshi rolled over on the floor with his lemon, roaring with laughter. He finally got up, chuckled a little and opened his eyes, wiping a tear away.

"Oh, man! I'll never be angry again! You are a good doctor!" Dr. Mario smiled triumphantly at his success...not realizing that Yoshi was still squeezing the lemon through his laughter. The whole thing exploded and the juice flew all over Yoshi, who stopped dead in his tracks. He glared at Dr. Mario and gritted his teeth angrily. "You're dead," he said promptly. He shrieked a battle cry and Dr. Mario screamed while running out of his office, while Yoshi took his gun and chased him.

Dr. Mario darted through the field like a bullet, until he ran into a wall. Yoshi quickly caught up and aimed the gun right at Dr. Mario's head. He was cornered in. Yoshi got ready...and fired the gun. Yoshi yelled in pain as he was thrown backward onto the ground and closed his eyes, dead, as he had aimed the end that actually shot at himself on accident. Blood flowed through the grass and Dr. Mario brushed off his pants and headed off toward his office for the next patient.

Review. The next victim...uh, patient will be Donkey Kong.