Prologue:
Kiran:
The ground was crunchy with shattered glass, shattered bone, and shattered bullet shells that made our stealthy tiptoe into the city everything but what we wanted it to be. We thought we had the element of surprise but it turns out all we had now were the weapons in our hands. To me—Spanish Sunspot—was entrusted the awesome bible bat, John—the Green Giant—his three barrel shot gun, Turanga—Great Grand-Calypso—the flamethrower, Dave—Lone Wolf—a random pistol he found on the ground, and Amy—Incredible—that stupid fur gun. This is all that was left to defeat the swarm of parasite-infected humanoids. The odds that we would survive were one hundred million to one but that didn't matter to me. I never was a betting woman.
We crossed before John's apartment just outside the center of town and paused with a heavy silence in front of the space. Our eyes all drifted to Amy, left arm crossed over her abdomen as her right hand shakily clutched the alien weapon. She seemed confused until Dave grasped her shoulders and then she began to cry as he calmly spoke, "Amy, I want you to go up to the building, alright? No questions, no protests, no anything. You stay up there and if shit goes south you shoot a helicopter out of that thing and get the hell out of here."
"David, no! You don't have to do this! None of you have to do this," she declared, crumbling all of our thin facades.
This whole time I had tried to desensitize myself to all this but Amy had a way of making everything disturbingly real. Tears and her glasses amplified her strong green eyes and I could see the wheels turning in that brilliant mind of hers, but to be honest I didn't want another way out. All this time everyone said I could end this—I was the hero—but so far I have done nothing. In every broken window echoed the agony of tortured souls I could have saved and I just couldn't live with that if I allowed whatever scheme Amy was thinking to take away my chance at a good clean fight.
"Listen, w-we can grab one of the mannequins from the department store and attach the flame thrower to it and that'll distract them long enough to get away," she begged, beginning to sob when it became apparent no one was buying it, "David, I can't let you go! Please, I need you, I need all of you! David you promised you wouldn't leave me! You swore!"
"Amy," the way he said her name made me stand at attention. Dave was always reluctant to take the lead but he could be the boss when he wanted to, "This isn't about me anymore, this isn't even about you. This is about that little guy-"
"-Or girl," Turanga interrupted.
"-Or girl in your stomach right now that needs to be born. I fucked up so much in my life, Amy, and I need you to make sure that's the one thing I did right, okay? Now go up there because I need to do this. I have to."
"Actually, Dave, you don't."
It was the first thing John had said since he tried to tell me he loved me and I didn't let him. Turanga said love was a weakness and if I were to accept my destiny I couldn't have anything hold me back. Love…love definitely did that.
"We need someone to make sure she doesn't shoot another beard, although a flying beard would be awesome. And…and all that time I thought you were dead I honestly, I didn't want to go on. I can't do that again. I can't watch you die again," John's voice didn't quiver although his full lovely lips did.
David stared back hard at John as he snapped, "How do you think I feel? You're my only friend. What am I supposed to do when you're gone?"
A strange realization hit me in the middle of their softness. The whole time they knew we were going to die. This whole time they had no doubt we were going to be condemned. The whole second part of the plan was a lie, a rouse, for what? For Amy's sake? Jeez, I thought we had some hope—I thought I still had some hope.
"Name your son after me, obviously," John smirked while Dave rolled his eyes.
"We have to go," Turanga urged in that cold tone she used when emotions got too much for her to deal with.
David looked between us all in that way he did when things needed to get done and he didn't even know where to begin. He shook his head as he stared at John and angrily barked, "There's so much I have to say."
"Trust me," John smiled in that samurai sensei way only he did, "Everything you have to say I already know."
David opened his mouth but I was done with all the epic sadness their goodbye stirred in me and I had to part with someone myself. I crossed the space between me and Amy in two strides and without a word wrapped my arms around her tight. Amy and I didn't have the chance to develop a strong relationship but even without her consent so far I knew we would have something strong. To my surprise her arms reached around to grab and embrace me back and I could just barely feel her tears on my neck. There's something about her that makes me feel like she is something precious I need to protect. But Dave has been protecting her a long time before I've been around. They don't need me.
I release Amy and John and Dave with that puzzled look they shared from time to time as I willed myself to get strong again. I couldn't cry. I couldn't let my friends die. I had to be strong. I had to be a light warrior.
Once we were far enough away Turanga muttered angrily, "I saved your life thirty fucking times and I don't even get a fucking high five, fuck this."
"And I'm your soul mate," John grumbled, "What's this shit?"
A smile pulled on my face as I stared angrily forward in pretend frustration, "Guys, I think we've got serious business we need to attend to."
"No way, I think we all need to talk about this," Turanga snapped.
"Yeah!" John piggybacked.
"Fine, fine. All right, how about this? If we survive we all get a congratulatory group hug," I tried to hide my grin in the form of annoyance but they both could see the truth.
"Alright, that sounds more like it," Turanga chuckled.
"Yeah, and maybe a little more too?" I joked, enjoying the sight of John's eyes bulging out of his head.
Turanga smirked and gave him a rough elbow, "We'll finally put that big dick to good use."
I couldn't help but laugh at the two of them as I shut my eyes and put by hands over my ears to try and pretend I didn't want to hear what they were saying. They both had a long list of terms and conditions and while I did find it amusing the only thing I really cared about was how the light had returned to their eyes. Before we had been walking as if to a funeral procession but now…now we were discussing the first things we would eat when we won…how long we would all indulge in naked bubble baths. It didn't matter if we were out numbered. All that mattered was that we had hope when they had nothing.
At least…that was what I thought.
As we rounded the corner and saw every infected person standing at the center of town waiting for us it became clear that this was not a battle we were ever meant to win.
I whispered.
"Fuck."
