Azula's Detective Agency

The Economist and the Admiral

"Why would they name a restaurant 'Fat Boy'?" Azula and Katara entered the Fat Boy Fried Food and Take Out. After the War the Fat Boy restaurant chain spread over the globe and soon everyone in the Avatar realm could order food high in salt and cholesterol. The taxes paid on the meals Fat Boy cooked did help finance medical insurance plans so it came out about even in the end. This Fat Boy restaurant had a large seating area and delivered food to those too lazy to come into the restaurant. Azula faced the girl at the counter and looked up at the signs to decide what to order.

"Fat Boy can also mean Good Luck in Chinese." The plain looking blond haired girl manning the cash said happily. "Welcome to Fat Boy. May I take your order?"

"Fat Boy fries, the large soda and a vegetarian burger." Azula said swiftly and efficiently.

"Can I get a soda, fish sticks and fries." Katara added.

The cashier politely gave the total and took the money and then placed the paper with their orders on the counter between the restaurant and the kitchen. Azula and Katara sat at the back of the restaurant in order to engage in people watching. The restaurant looked like any franchise with large glass windows and a gaudy brightly blue and red color scheme with red and tan colored tiles on the floor. In the front of the seating area a brightly painted wooden carving of the restaurant mascot – Fatso the Fat Boy – towered over the customers.

"Karo stopped at the bank to pay a bill." Azula began as she folded a napkin. "Before he shows up I have to ask you a serious question. In the Siege of the North Admiral Zhao died but did they ever find a body?"

"I don't think so." Katara answered solemnly. "Why do you ask?"

"Lady Zhao received a letter yesterday." Azula answered. "She swears it came from her late and maybe not so late husband."

"Maybe he sent a letter a long time and it got lost in the mail." Katara offered up a theory substantiated by a good deal of evidence. The Earth Kingdom postal service could give lessons to communist regimes on inefficiency and the service certainly didn't rate as stellar. The Fire Nation had a quick and convenient postal system which took only a few days to deliver a letter across the country. In Ba Sing Se a letter from two doors down the street could take weeks and mail moved at a pace best described as geological.

"The postmark came from the Fire Nation and dates two weeks ago." Azula explained. "We checked that first."

"Hello." The waitress placed their orders on the table. "Enjoy your meal."

"Where is Karo? He shouldn't take this long to pay a bill." Azula wondered aloud. Karo had set off to go to the bank and pay some bills for his mom but he had promised to return and have lunch with the two girls. "He must have gone on one of those 'Open' days when they have ten teller stations, two working tellers and the line snakes out the door."

"Why do they have ten teller stations, two working tellers and they let the line snake out the door?" Karo stood off to the side of the large white marble finished foyer that led into the bank and made certain the gas bill tallied and that no one had moved decimals on him. He slowly walked outside and made certain he had withdrawn enough money to pay the paper boy. He pushed open the heavy dark brown wooden doors and placed the papers in his vest.

Thump!

Karo walked past a dark alley and felt something strike the back of his head. He saw a flash of blue and felt a momentary shock like electricity flow through his body and then lost consciousness.

* * *

Karo watched the bare gray ground rush past his face. He did not take this as a good sign since the ground appeared rocky and rough not cobbled and smooth. He tried to move but he found his limbs bound and after a moment of thought and careful observation concluded that he lay face down on the back of a large mammal running briskly overland in the afternoon sun. He had hoped this knowledge would prove useful but it did not.

"Hello? Excuse me?" Karo yelled in a near hysterical panic but still polite. "Why have you tied me up?"

"Admiral Zhao paid me to find you, kidnap you and bring you to him." A female voice replied. Karo could not see the woman but she sounded a few years older than him.

"The dead Admiral Zhao?" Karo answered back with his voice only slightly less hysterical. "My dead father?"

"Yes." The woman answered.

"And you are?" Karo tried to move but this person could also tie knots with great skill.

"Jun the Bounty Hunter." The woman answered calmly.

"Karo the Economist." Karo took in a deep breath after he introduced himself.

"I know that." Jun replied abruptly.

"And this large creature doesn't look like a standard issue mammal." Karo kept trying to work his way free despite his common sense. The ropes didn't give and the fall from the large mammal could kill him leaving his bones to bleach in the sun.

"Nyla." Jun made a swift turn.

"I'll take your word for it." Karo had not expected to ride through the remote wastes of the Earth Kingdom on some kind of impossibly large animal but now he had to adjust. "I will ignore the question of his death but why does my father wish to see me now?"

"I don't know." Jun snapped the reins. "I don't question my client's motives. I had a job to find Admiral Zhao's son and I found him and in order to get the rest of the money owed me I have to bring you in good condition to the man who called himself Admiral Zhao."

"Admiral Zhao drowned at the Siege of the North." Karo said. "Which came as something of a relief for the many people he tormented. At least you got half paid. Can you drop me off at a nearby farmhouse or other human habitation and tell your client I proved too clever and escaped."

"Not even the zombie dead are stupid enough to believe that." Jun answered. "I have a reputation to uphold so I will bring you to him and claim my money."

"What if I offered you money to let me go." Karo offered.

"The amount you can pay could never be enough to repair the damage to my reputation." Jun wondered how the older, evil looking man who hired her could have such am odd son – a mix of Fire Nation refinement and too much of a doting mother. Zhao wanted to meet his son and train him as a warrior soul but to her it seemed unlikely to work. "Shut up or I will hit you over the head again."

Karo shut up because his head still hurt from the first blow he had sustained. The afternoon turned to evening and Nyla took them toward the eastern coast of the Earth Kingdom. Karo could see nothing but he could smell and hear the sea and decided to remind Jun of a crucial fact.

"I can't swim." Karo said.

"Zhao has thought of that." Jun kept him tied up by stopped Nyla with a snap of her reins.

"An eelhound." A stern looking man rode out from behind a copse of weathered rocks. "I trust you can ride?"

"Hell no!" Karo stammered as he examined the outline of a sleek animal pacing in the dark.

"Here is the rest of your fee." The man had a deep menacing voice which sent shivers down Karo's spine. A bag of gold pieces made a jingling sound as Jun caught it in midair. "You can count it."

"How would I know how to ride an eelhound?" Karo asked. "Nothing in my life prepared me for this moment."

"Untie him." The man commanded Jun. Karo could not clearly see anything but the sky which had taken on a deep red hue as the sun set over the Earth Kingdom. Jun tugged at a few knots and shoved Karo off Nyla. Karo took a moment to examine Jun's pet more closely and yet could not work out what class of mammal it belong in and settled on something akin to a rat – Marlin Perkins Karo was not. He turned around and faced the man who had spoken to him.

"How can you be my father!" Karo asked desperately. "He died and the last time I checked even the best doctors could cure death. What happened? The doctor told you to take two pills and you'd be living again? "

"Do you need to be beaten into submission?" The man stood at six feet tall and wore a gray and fiendish looking goatee. He wore the uniform of a Fire Nation admiral and he looked menacing. The sun's setting rays vanished in the deep crags of his rough face.

"No." Karo answered bluntly.

"He complains a lot." Jun warned the stern man then she rode off quickly satisfied that her fee had been completely paid.

"I came back to teach you of the true path of a warrior." The stern man handed Karo the reins to an odd looking animal that looked like a cross between a Greyhound dog and a starved green pony with lizard mixed in.

"I don't want to follow the path of a warrior." Karo tried climbing on the eelhound and failed in spite of the fact the animal lay down on its belly. "I study economics."

"I have not seen you since you were three." The man picked Karo boldly off the ground and placed him in seated position on the eelhound behind him. "You always acted like a klutz. I hope you only act that way and that if challenged with an Agni Kai you would act with grace and honor."

"I would hide or flee while screaming not in the face!" Karo answered. "Better to live a long life with no honor than a short one as an honorable corpse. I can fire bend but my friend Azula admires my grace but not my power."

"So you can fire bend?" The stern man flipped his animal into motion. "And you have the hand of the Princess as your fiancée?"

"I have said too much." Karo gulped as he felt the eelhound begin to move. The eelhound could easily carry three or four people his size and he feared trampling or drowning if he fell off.

"Nothing I had not heard before." The stern man guided his eelhound into the water and Karo who could not swim and hated the water; gulped as his ride headed toward the ocean surf.

* * *

"What do you think it means?" Katara looked over Azula's shoulder as she picked up a piece of paper lying in the alley outside the local bank.

"The paperboy may not get paid." Azula examined the ground and ignored Katara as she paced around thinking. "He took out the money to pay the paperboy at the same time as we met for lunch."

"Five hours ago." Katara looked down to the ground for anything that might yield a cue.

"Karo hates lateness." Azula spoke calmly as she looked at the bank receipt and this worried her far more than he showed. "And he enjoys the comics and puzzle page in the paper. He would crawl over glass and vipers on his belly to pay the paperboy on time."

"Could he have gone off with someone?" Katara said.

"Do you mean to imply anything?" Azula sounded frustrated and insulted.

"No." Katara backed off. "I meant to say – I wonder if someone would have kidnapped him."

"Who?" Azula had read the mysterious letter but it said nothing of any importance. The writer stated that Admiral Zhao still lived and would claim is past glories. No one knew what that meant – least of all Azula – but she found it difficult to imagine even a deranged military failure would want to kidnap the soft and gentle Karo. She knew to a military man - Karo's fussy nature, his clumsy inability to make his muscles do exactly what his brain wanted and his odd inability to grasp not so subtle points made him less than ideal as a soldier. Azula had known of Zhao's hot temper and cruel discipline and shuddered to think what might befall Karo when the two men met.

"Admiral Zhao." Katara said as if delivering distressing news.

"Family is the root of all evil." Azula paused and gritted her teeth. "But how did he know how to find Karo at the bank?"

Katara had no answer for the question Azula posed.

"He would not leave these behind." Katara picked up a pair of delicate wire framed glasses and handed them to Azula. Someone has smashed the lenses out but Azula recognized the frames.

"No he wouldn't. He can't see farther than a few yards without them." Azula examined the glasses with care. She paced the area searching for more clues while she held onto the glasses.

"What has green hair?" Azula had acute vision and pointed up to an ornate streetlight hanging off a chain. She had set her mind to find inconsistencies and a tuft of dark green hair hanging off a gas lamp caught her eye. She walked up the street and climbed up the lamp to examine it closely. Azula still had fine reflexes and had the hair in her hand when she walked back to Katara. Katara had seen hair like it but hesitated to provide an answer too quickly.

"Jun?" Katara said cautiously.

"Late May actually." Azula held out the hair while Katara carefully examined it.

"Jun the Bounty Hunter!" Katara corrected Azula. "Zuko hired her to chase me down."

* * *

The eelhound pulled up to a rough and rusty looking old Fire Nation destroyer and the stern man ordered his crew – rough and rusty looking sailors – to seize the young Karo and throw him in the brig. The stern man shook his head: he had not convinced his son that he was Admiral Zhao - his father. He thought to himself that his son looked as though he would amount to nothing in a battle. Karo had grumbling down as a fine art but he lacked the physical presence to command real respect. Karo could hear more than he could see as he couldn't make out much more than a few fuzzy details and his weak eyes smeared everything at a distance into a blur.

Two men lifted Karo off the eelhound and onto the deck of a sinister looking ship made of steel and all lit in an evil red light.

"I have rights!" Karo complained loudly. Police officers and firemen wore the uniforms and had rank in Ba Sing Se but laws prevented them from harassing honest citizens. Police directed traffic as well as fought crime or enforced by laws but to Karo they belonged to the category of 'good guys'. Of course a democratic government intent on re-election stood to lose a good deal of support by hiring thugs and bullies to enforce laws. These men belonged to the breed of rough men he had seen in the occupation – undisciplined and answerable to no court or authority save their commanders. He had hated such people then and hated them now.

"You can't imprison me!" Karo yelled.

"You don't know what we can do." The men had black helms over their faces and the man who spoke had a harsh breathlessness to his voice that made Karo grow cold. With a heave they tossed him into a small windowless cell in the brig and banged the door shut. The only opening in the room was a set of bars inlaid in a window in the door. A hideous red light lit up the small cell which had a metal bunk and worn gray blanket. A metal bucket for a urinal completed the dour mood.

"What do they do here?" Karo paced around his cell which due to nearsightedness remained sharply in focus. "Develop photographs?"

"I would speak to you." The stern old man opened the door to his cell.

"I need my glasses." Karo demanded.

"What glasses?" The stern man asked.

"Without my glasses I can see about this far." Karo held his arms apart. "Everything turns into a dingy out of focus patchwork of colors and I get headaches when I read."

"You have weak eyes?" The stern man sat on the metal bench that doubled for a bunk and did not sound pleased. "I imagine you have other health problems?"

"I have a very nervous stomach and traveling makes me sick." Karo stood across the room and leaned against the wall. "I never had keen reflexes and even when I fire bend my lousy co-ordination usually results in a miss and at times an unintentional fire."

"We can train you." The stern man sounded excited for a moment.

"My music teacher said much the same thing when I tried to master the oboe. I sucked and never got any better so they put me behind the louder instruments in band class. I sound like an epileptic budgie." Karo signed and rubbed his legs for the cell had become cold and he disliked the presence of a man whose evil he sensed. "I have no idea what you want from me."

"I had hoped for so much more." The man teased his beard. "I had hoped my son could strike fear into the heart of the nations of the world and serve his nation as a warrior."

"I might end up working for a bank." Karo tried to straighten himself up. "I could strike fear in anyone late with their mortgage payments?"

"You came from a nation that nearly conquered the world and you want to work for a bank?" The stern man sat calmly down and barely moved.

"I want a respectable career." Karo replied. "As I recall the Fire Nation failed to conquer the world."

"You don't approve of me?" The stern man showed a glimmer of anger.

"You had me kidnapped – hardly makes me warm up to you." Karo backed up against the wall but he had waited years while he tried to fall asleep and drown out the nightmares of the War. He had wondered what he would say to his father and rehearsed many times while he rolled in his bed. As he anticipated his ability to speak left him and he found himself staring at an evil looking middle aged military failure.

The stern man said nothing but stared at the odd green eyed dwarf who spat venom at him. Admiral Zhao did not take insubordination well but too he knew that Karo did not understand the Agni Kai and would refuse the match. Zhao could not afford such disgrace in front of his men. He did not imagine Karo would plead for mercy as the young Zuko had done before his father – Zhao would afford none. He knew his son had powerful friends in the disgraced Princess, Katara the Master Water Bender, the champion Earth Bender Toph and above all the Avatar. They would hunt him down if Karo came to grave harm. He lunged forward and slugged Karo hard in the chest and Karo dropped.

"Do not forget the world has not found me yet." The stern man stood over Karo who coughed up blood.

"Ah. I wear glasses so you know." Karo gasped in a voice barely above a whisper. He could taste blood and imagined he had broken ribs for he could not breathe without great pain. Blood trickled from his mouth and he began to feel frail and faint.

The world sank from Karo's eyes and he passed out.

* * *

"I never thought I'd miss those green eyes staring at me." Azula lay the glasses on the table as she sat with Katara in Lady Zhao's kitchen. Even the gas lamp did not fight off the gloom Azula felt as the skies over Ba Sing Se grew dark. Mitsumi chirped sadly because he had not seen his human all day and sensed from the mood of his mate something terrible had taken place. He lay on Azula's lap and tried to fend off his worst fears – that his human had gone for good. "And hear the fool say something idiotic or stunningly stupid."

"Lady Zhao has told Fire Lord Zuko." Katara assured Azula. "Fire Lord Zuko promised to call us back when he had more information and he promised to have the navy search for the kidnappers. The police have a warrant for the arrest of Jun."

"She had better hope they get to her first." Azula smashed her fists on the table making the centerpiece of dried paper flowers and the sugar shaker rattle. Azula looked agitated and very upset. "I can't sit here and do nothing."

"Come with me!" Katara stood up. "When Zuko tracked his Uncle to the old Outer Walls of Ba Sing Se we had the help of Jun. I know where she might end up."

"Where?" Azula asked.

"Imagine the seediest tavern in all the Earth Kingdom." Katara motioned for Azula to get up. "And we will find Jun!"

"How do we get there?" Azula asked desperately. "I assume we won't find it in Ba Sing Se with a sign saying 'Seediest Tavern in All the Earth Kingdom as rated by the Travel Guide'."

"Have you ever surfed water bending style?" Katara made a surfing gesture with her hands and spoke coyly. "The Earth Kingdom has a canal system and waterways that can take us nearly anywhere. We can go from the harbor in the city, out Lake Laogai and along the Great Canal in next to no time."

A half hour later the crane operators at the inland port of Ba Sing Se saw a Water Tribe girl, an uneasy lemur on her shoulder and a Fire Nation princess riding a five meter wave across the artificial harbor. One crane operator dropped ten wooden crates of cucumbers onto the dock with a loud crunch and a greasy sounding squish. Four dockworkers yelled every kind of insult they could think of as they had narrowly missed becoming work place accidents and now they had to contend with being covered with green goo and cleaning up ten tons of useless produce.

"Left! No My left! That way!" Azula screamed as Katara appeared to her to have set a direct course toward a large steel hulled freighter. Azula knew they would scratch the red paint but the insane speed Katara could cross water would ensure much pain and death if they collided with such a huge ship. Azula balanced on the wave as they sailed out of the harbor and away from the city out into Lake Laogai. Azula's eyes began to adjust to the dark as they moved south across the lake heading for the huge canal that lead from Lake Laogai to the main canal.

"I didn't think you worried about Karo." Katara asked Azula as the two girls rode across the still, dark waters of the lake. "The princess with the heart of ice and all that."

"Shut up." Azula stared directly ahead as they flew across the lake. "Keep your eyes on where you are going."

* * *

"Do not anger Admiral Zhao any more than you have to." A dark haired man in his mid thirties looked over Karo as he lay on his bunk in the metal cell. "He broke two ribs but only because he held back."

"He will try and break me anyway." Karo lay back. "What difference does it make if he does so physically or mentally?"

"He finds you disappointing." The doctor stood up with a chart in his hand. "He had expected a tall, young man with an athletic build – someone to take after his line. He has met you and found you lacking. You are very nearsighted, you are prone to ulcers and have no love for the sea."

"Return me to the store and get your money refunded." Karo laughed and then regretted it as his chest exploded in pain.

"You have your whole life ahead of you." The doctor tapped his clipboard nervously.

"I wanted to spend it doing puzzles in the paper and studying currency flow in the economy." Karo wept softly and spoke hoarsely.

"He can have you killed." The doctor reminded Karo.

"He broke my ribs – I guessed killing is a minor extra bit of work for him." Karo sighed

Karo felt the engines of the ship slowly rev up and the ship began to move slowly forward. Admiral Zhao entered the room and dismissed the doctor with a nervous bow. The doctor handed him the clipboard and Zhao examined it as his brows furrowed.

"We will leave these waters. I imagine your friends have begun searching for you." Admiral Zhao leaned against the far wall with his arms crossed and a look of serene menace on his face. "You do not fear death?"

"I have tried to avoid dying." Karo did not move and yelled in frustration.

"I see." Admiral Zhao did not move. "Princess Azula will begin tracking me. She will have meager resources but she will pursue me."

"Get to the point please." Karo lay back. "I have grown tired and sore."

"If I cannot have the world at least I can have one of the nations." Zhao sounded cool and calm. "You two plan to marry and so the Zhao family will have a line to the throne. Lady Ursa taught us that the rest amounts to initiative and grave motivation."

"She had to protect her son!" Karo felt very tired.

"Do you know what she did?" Zhao had the legs of a true naval professional and did not move at all when Karo felt the gray rusty hulk lurch sideways in the water.

"She used rat poison." Karo had heard the story from Azula and kept it in strictest confidence but he imagined Zhao knew as much as Karo about the events of that night. "I have no idea of any of the details."

"Such scheming." Zhao calmly answered. "She acted on that night to remove an old man from the throne and spared us the rule of Iroh."

"You have become pedantic." Karo complained as he tried to pull the blanket over his cold and tired body.

"I know your medical history." Zhao tapped the clipboard with his hand. "You have a mild form of hemophilia – you have thin blood. Our medical science can describe it but has no idea what causes it but it runs in some Fire Nation family lines."

"No one has a perfect body." Karo had no health complaints to note and so such news amounted to a bit of medical trivia. Azula had allergies to seafood that made her watch her diet and had gone quite deaf in one ear. Toph had been born blind. Katara could not bear children. Thin blood seemed to Karo as an easy burden – so it took longer for a cut to close? In this world what could he expect? Karo knew medical science had new tools – the vaccine, X-Ray and new drugs but he knew medical science had real limits. Lithium, Warfarin, Aspirin, Phenytoin and a hundred and one drugs made people better but all came out of accidents – no one knew anything but the basics of molecular biology. Zhao didn't care and Karo had no grasp of the terminology.

* * *

"Jun?" Azula let the door of the tavern feel the full fury of her rage by blowing it up. Even Katara feared the bounty hunter named Jun. Azula had the calm voice of a blessed lunatic and Jun knew this immediately. She had hoped it would take Azula some time to find her and by that time she could have vanished but Azula walked up to her and stared at her as she sipped her tea. A blue glow came from Azula's hand but Katara had a strange trust in Azula's self control. She had seen Nyla outside the inn but had not harmed or even threatened the animal.

"You came sooner than I expected." Jun placed her tea down. "Princess Azula."

"I have a cousin named Karo and you made off with him." Azula hissed. "I want him back."

"A pitiful excuse for a guy and not the kind of man who deserves the arm of a princess." Jun answered calmly. "Green eyed like his lemur and far too cute, too gentle to make his way in this world."

"Humiliate this bitch!" Katara demanded.

"We need her help." Azula answered back calmly but Katara could hear that scratchy menace in the Princess's voice. "And she will be willing to help us."

"I did a job." Jun stood up and Azula burned her snake tattoo off her right arm in a quick and swift fire bending motion. She found it shocking to see the blue flame from Azula's hand wrap around her arm and she smelled her flesh burn before she felt any pain. Jun fell back in shock and held her arm but Azula had made the burn deep and painful so Jun would have no doubt as to who she was dealing with.

"You will do one for me." Azula hissed as she sat down. She tapped her fingernails on the table. "You will help us find Karo. If I sense any hesitation on your part I will kill you in a gruesome and unspeakable way. As it stands now I didn't would you fatally but burns can become infected."

"Don't you have anything to say?" Jun held her arm and grimaced in pain as she looked at Katara.

"If she kills you I'll probably have to sweep bits of you off the floor." Katara had her arms crossed.

"I have no choice do I?" Jun sat down with a feeling of desperate resignation while the strange assortments of peasants watched in astonishment. Jun had always found herself in control but in one swift motion Azula had disarmed her and forced her into doing her bidding. Katara found Azula's actions harsh but in this case Katara thought – Azula had very little choice. Jun had captured Karo, she had the means to track Zhao and Azula knew this. Jun could move faster but Azula had proven the sharpness of her aim.

"How did you track him?" Katara asked as they left the tavern.

"Zhao kept Karo's favorite toy as a child – a small stuffed penguin." Jun held out an old torn stuffed toy. "What will you do if Karo chooses to remain and serve his father."

"Have you met Karo?" Azula pushed Jun ahead with her hand and laughed out loud. "I have tried teaching him fighting skills and to put it bluntly – he is a nearsighted little moron. The lemur could do better in an Agni Kai."

"Why do you care what happens to him?" Jun felt Azula tug at the arm of her trench coat.

"Shut up and do as you're told." Azula pushed Jun almost to the ground.

* * *

Karo had fallen asleep exhausted and Admiral Zhao had let him sleep until midmorning. Zhao knew that he controlled time since Karo could not see daylight and his trip had left him disoriented. Karo simply fell into a deep exhausted dreamless sleep and woke up to find his father shaking his shoulder. He woke up in the same awful red light and he tried hard not to move because his ribs ached and he felt very bruised.

"Time for another one of our talks – son." Zhao had brought a small steel chair in with him when he entered the room.

"I am my mom's son – not yours." Karo had never had a father although he respected Uncle Iroh and he objected to this man. Karo did not think he needed a father now.

"Why hasn't your Fire Nation guile and honor awakened in you?" Zhao sat on the chair but still made for an imposing figure. "You speak so casually to me."

"You will drone on about Fire Nation honor." Karo sighed. "It works as a way of life for you but I don't have psychopathic tendencies."

"I should severely punish...." Zhao felt the ship rock almost forty degrees and heard loud creaks as the hull protested under some unknown attacker. The ship rocked back and then stopped suddenly. The sudden drop in speed from a full twelve knots to nothing in a second or less sent Karo flying off his bed and Zhao fell backwards off his chair. Karo felt an explosion of pain as he struck the floor. Zhao wondered how they could hit ice this far south. The Fire Nation destroyer had a sharp pointed steel hull which allowed for speed but in ice made the vessel very vulnerable. Zhao knew this. The Water Tribe built shallow rounded hulls do the ice pack would lift the ship out. A Fire Nation steel hull became gripped by the ice and locked in place.

"I can't swim." Karo groped around and steadied himself against the bulkhead of the ship as it desperately struggled to move forward. Zhao ran out the door in order to see what had happened to his ship. He never made it. Karo heard a series of loud concussions as if explosives had gone off. Crewmen screamed and then fled. Karo grabbed the bars of his cell hoping to see the action and hoping the ship would not sink in the middle of nowhere with him trapped in the cell.

"We have two girls attacking us." Karo overheard one of the crew appraise Zhao of the information.

"The Princess!" Zhao screamed and stormed off to find Azula standing in a commanding position at the head of the stairs leading below decks.

"You have found yourself on my bad side." Azula tapped her finger against her sleeve. "My friend and I want Karo returned unharmed."

"How did you.....?" Zhao screamed and watched helplessly as Azula deflected his powerful fire bending attack and turned his orange bolt into nothing with a wave of her hand.

"We found Jun and after some persuasive arguments had her help us track down Karo." Azula explained as she used a swift sweep and toppled a confused crewman as he tried to rush her with a knife. The crewman crashed down the stairs and the knife he held went sliding down the deck and struck his head on a bulkhead – he did not move. "And some help from Tux!"

"Tux....that stuffed penguin he liked as a child?" Zhao mused as he pondered the standoff like a curling skip deciding on the next throw.

"Tux?" Karo heard that old name. His father had never approved of his love of animals and refused to let him own a pet so his mother found Tux the penguin. He had to leave his fondest toys behind when he left in the middle of the night with his mother and he always felt he had abandoned Tux to destruction at the hands of his father. They had to meet a Water Tribe ship which carried them to safety in the Northern Water Tribe until they had found a ship to take them to Ba Sing Se as refugees. He left with nothing and his mother had only her wits and the money she stole from her husband to keep them going.

"Have you found him?" Katara screamed loudly from above decks as she froze another man into place slamming him hard against a funnel.

"I have to get through this Admiral who died and rose on the third day." Azula never let her gaze leave Zhao. "He has to make up his mind if he wants to do this the hard way or the easy way. I prefer the hard way."

"Bring it on." Katara sent a crew member flying overboard and he slid across the ice like a hockey puck landing a hundred meters from the ship. Katara instantly froze him in place. The crew member could not understand how a cold thick mist had instantly formed out of nowhere on a warm day in late May on a calm ocean.

"You want it this way." Azula walked down the metal steps slowly motioning to Zhao to attack. Zhao sent another fire bolt at Azula and she brew it off not even bothering to show signs of working hard. Zhao attacked by rushing forward and Azula moved deftly out of his way then scissor kicked him against the metal wall. He turned back at Azula who leaped in the air and rushed at him from above. He fired a bolt and melted a ceiling panel letting the cold outside air into the ship. Azula grabbed Zhao by the neck and held him in a headlock. She pointed her finger at him and a hot blue flame grew from it.

"You want to kill me!" Zhao hissed.

"You will go to prison and rot!" Katara appeared at the top of the stairs having scattered the crew and thoroughly confused the. She froze Zhao in a hard ice block that only let his face show.

"Karo?" Azula yelled.

"Yes." He struggled to shout.

"You live." Azula walked toward his voice. "I lose the bet."

Azula exercised great self restraint as she used lightning to blow the door of Karo's cell off its hinges. She ran in and grabbed Karo who yelped out in pain.

"I have a few broken ribs." Karo bled from his mouth. "Courtesy of my dad."

"Katara!" Azula yelled as she let Karo lean against her. "Get that hot Water Tribe ass down here!"

"Hot Water Tribe ass?" Katara turned up outside the door and Mitsumi jumped all over Karo in a show of affection and relief that his human had not left this mortal plane.

"I have a fondness for it." Azula answered. "Karo has broken ribs."

"Sit still Karo." Katara pushed her hands against his chest. A blue glow erupted from her hands and Karo could feel the pain begin to vanish.

"Can we go now?" Jun appeared in the doorway as Katara worked to heal Karo.

"Crap!" Karo struggled to the back of the cell.

"Him?" Jun said sarcastically. "I had to see it for myself."

"How did you get free?" Katara grasped Karo so he would not run.

"I asked first." Jun replied. "Isn't it unnatural for cousins to fall in love?"

Azula slugged Jun in the head.

* * *

"I hate my life." Jun complained as Azula dragged her out of the ship.

"I hate your life too." Azula helped Karo up the stairs as Mitsumi squealed for joy at having his human returned to him. Katara followed behind Azula with the cowed Admiral Zhao.

"You know I will have that burn scar for life!" Jun still felt the pain from Azula's blow to the head. Azula had not proven insane – Zhao had assured Jun that Azula posed no threat but Jun had a bad burn and a concussion to disprove Zhao's hypothesis.

"Blame him." Azula pointed to Admiral Zhao.

"Will you kill me?" Jun knew of the cruel Princess Azula and fully expected her life to end. She did not show the fear but she felt a great dread come over her as she imagined the horrid fate the angry Princess Azula could bring upon her.

"I should." Azula heard the still ice imprisoned Zhao being dragged by Katara across the frozen deck of the ship. "You made Mitsumi the Lemur very unhappy because his human went missing and nearly turned my fiancé into a real guy."

"I see."

"No you don't!" Azula glared at Jun and let go of Karo who stumbled to a sitting position. "You hellishly dressed hermaphrodite. I want Karo as he is – weird, kind of girlish and neat."

"Ouch." Karo sat on the deck. "I think I am still bleeding internally."

"You are." Katara dragged Zhao along.

"At least we are clear on that." Karo replied.

"I have kind of lost my lust for killing." Azula pushed Jun ahead of her and grabbed Karo by the arm. "But not maiming. I could give you away as a pet."

"He has hemophilia." Zhao shivered. "It runs in the family."

"I knew he was gay but you have a wife – ow." Jun felt Azula slug her in her badly burned arm.

"He is bleeding to death inside." Katara announced seriously as she dropped the chain and let Zhao thaw on his own. "We don't have much time."

"What will you do to me if he dies?" Jun asked out of a total sense of self interest.

"I will kill you." Azula helped Karo stand up. "Do you know how hard a time I had finding a man who could disappoint me in bed like him?"

"I will die with those words ringing in my ears?" Karo limped along.

"No one will die." Katara dropped the chain that she had used to pull the ice that imprisoned Admiral Zhao and propped up Karo. "You will live to disappoint your lover many more times."

"You don't disappoint me." Azula patted his back.

"We can get him to the Northern Water Tribe and they can heal his wounds." Katara explained as she shoved Jun ahead of her. "Then we ship Jun to Kyoshi Island from there."

"Nice." Jun felt Katara jab her along the ice she had used to imprison the ship.

"If you behave we may put air holes in the crate." Katara threatened.

* * *

"Where am I?" Karo had his eyes closed but had heard Azula talking to him.

"Alive." Azula sat on the edge of his bed. "Under the care of the Northern Water Tribe."

"I remember surfing on Jun's big rat and the bounty hunter kept talking to me about her adventures and then I mercifully blacked out." Karo opened his eyes to see a small room carved out of ice. "I see someone put Tux on my pillow."

"You nearly didn't make it." Azula said sadly. Mitsumi lay asleep next to Karo. "I had begun to plan to move my crap into your room. Mitsumi hasn't left your side in a day."

"How close?"

"Katara kept you going but you had a punctured lung and nearly bled to death." Azula counseled.

Mitsumi lifted his head and snuggled close to Karo as if to add his support. His human still looked white and Mitsumi could sense he had grown very ill but sensed he had come around.

"You have quite the friend there." An elderly man – a Water Tribe healer – walked in the room. Katara followed him and gave Karo a hug.

"Mitsumi?" Karo stroked the little lemur's warm head with his hand.

"The Princess and Katara have kept you company too." The white haired man with refined features answered. "You have good friends."

"Will I live?" Karo felt weak and had trouble breathing.

"You will live." The healer patted his shoulder. "You will need a week in my home to recover enough to travel but you will live."

"Does our insurance cover this?" Karo said pragmatically.

"You came with the great Water Bender – Katara of the Southern Water Tribe." The old man bowed politely. "And the Princess Azula who has complained endlessly about the toilets."

"What toilets?" Azula replied. "You have a hole in the ice. I keep expecting a seal to surface."

"I am Healer Baku and am glad to help." With that awkward introduction he patted Karo's shoulder and then left the room.

"We don't need flush toilets – we use water bending." Katara reminded Azula.

"Have you ever tried to read a paper sitting on a block of ice?" Azula asked Katara. "I can't read when my butt goes numb."

"I regained consciousness for this?" Karo lay back.

* * *

"We leave tomorrow." Azula walked around the Northern Water Tribe city with Karo. The Water Tribes did not have the open attitude toward foreigners she found welcoming in Ba Sing Se. The Water Tribe treated their guests well but Azula had the sense she would never find herself welcomed into their social circles.

"The Water Tribe will be glad to rid themselves of us." Karo felt much better but he still felt tired and weak. He found the graceful city endlessly fascinating and had even mastered the hole in the floor 'toilet' by using a bucket to flush it. "You hate the tea, the toilets and can't stand the food. I have cost their health care system a packet."

"You mean Baku?" Azula paid the city no attention since she found it quaint and lacking in conveniences. The water bending toilet struck her as a profound statement about the Luddite nature of the Water Tribe culture. She found no evidence of electricity except for the telegraph office which made sense since housing made of ice made for an electrical hazard of shocking proportions. They used small oil lamps to light their homes at night which for Azula meant dark rooms and barked shins. In her eyes the Northern Water Tribe city had all the amenities of a gulag with the charm of a mining camp with a climate that took every chance to kill people.

"I have an allergy to whatever the hell they made my bed covers out of." Karo walked around a display of fresh fish set out on the street to pull in customers to Yama the Fishmonger. "I wish I knew what animal they skinned to make them."

"A seal probably came out of the toilet and so they clubbed it and made a quilt out of it." Azula nearly walked off the ice sidewalk into the water since she had grown accustomed to stone streets with crosswalks. "I have not seen a large department store with a fine selection of linens. Have we grown soft because we buy stuff and don't make it for ourselves?"

"Don't kid yourself - we suck at making stuff." Azula laughed and breathed out a cloud of white mist.

"Hold on." Karo leaned against a wooden statue of Yue which stood outside of a local wood carver. "I have to catch my breath."

"We have had no news of Zhao." Azula waited while Karo gasped for breath. "Jun left on the first ship out of here and Zhao seems to have vanished."

"He did a good job of hiding all these years." Karo said.

"I have many questions about him." Azula leaned against the wall of the shop. "How did he survive? Why did he wait to come after you? What has he planned?"

"I want to feel well again." Karo sighed. "My chest hurts."