"Why do I have to do this?" I ask.

I am in Kaija's kitchen, my sleeves rolled up past my elbows, and a flowery apron tied around my midsection. I do not know why I allowed Kaija to tie this thing on me. It just happened, and now I am unsure of how to remedy it without offending her.

"Because, Cachexys, who is going to do it for you?" Kaija replies.

"...you do it for me," I say. Obviously. She cooks dinner every night. Is that going to change? And why?

"Yes, Cachexys, but you're part of this household, and you need to learn how to contribute. And also, you need to know how to care for yourself. I promise, you'll feel good about it in the end. It's just a bit messy getting there."

I shrug my shoulders, giving in. If she wants me cracking open undeveloped chicken fetuses and mixing them with the bodily fluid of a cow in an attempt to care for myself, I won't argue. Elias said she is feeling particularly emotional lately, so perhaps this is happening because of that. Whatever.

"Okay, let's start! Can you add those eggs you cracked in with the milk, and whisk it all together? I'm going to grab some cheese and ham, and I'll be right back." Kaija exits the kitchen, heading for the cellar.

I pick up the metal contraption she left next to the "mixing" bowl. I don't see how this bowl is any different than any other bowl, but whatever. I guess it's a bowl only for mixing things. Anyway, this metal thing has many thin, metal wires all bent into an arch, and attached to a handle. I've seen Kaija use it before, so I plunge it into the liquid, whipping my hand rapidly back and forth as she does.

Milk goes flying everywhere, along with the sticky yellow parts of the eggs. I grip the whisk tightly, feeling fearful. I can hear Kaija approaching. I wonder how upset this will make her? A little? A lot? Will she hate me for dirtying her space? I should have used this damn thing more carefully. I was too confident. I shouldn't have thought this was so stupid. I -

"Oh goodness," Kaija says, laughter in her voice. That does nothing to ease my mind. War laughed many times before he lashed out at me. She seems her usual, happy self though. I watch her set the basket of cheese and ham she retrieved on the table, all while I remain as still as a statue. "Here," she says, tossing me a rag. "Help me clean up."

I drop the whisk in an attempt to catch the rag, but miss it, and am left looking at my empty hands.

"I - I am sorry, Kaija. I didn't mean to make a mess. Forgive me."

Kaija laughs, batting at me playfully with the rag she picked up off the floor. "It's no big deal, Cachexys. Accidents happen. Just help me clean it up, and we'll be right as rain again."

She shoots me another smile. Hesitantly, I grab the whisk off the ground and place it in the sink, then begin wiping milk off the cabinets. Soon, the mess is cleared.

Kaija reaches for the now dirty rag in my hands, and I hand it to her. She put both our rags in the washing basket, then turns to me. "Okay. Nice try, but you aren't getting out of making breakfast!" She giggles.

I am mortified. She thought I did that on purpose? No. She can't think that, because she said it was an accident, and that those happen. She is joking with me. But is that good, or bad?

"Cachexys?" Kaija says gently. I must have gotten that look on my face again, the one she tells me worries her. I shake my head, clearing it of the destructive thoughts that threaten to overwhelm me.

"Yes. I'm okay. I'm fine. Let's...cook." I attempt a smile.

Kaija shows me how to whisk more carefully, and soon the eggs and milk are frothy and bright. She tells me to add salt and pepper to them. I do so, careful not to add too much.

"So, I like to make omelettes, but since you're just learning, let's make these into scrambled eggs. We can add the ham and cheese once the eggs are done, and it will be delicious!"

Kaija is looking for a response from me, it seems, so I say, "Yes." I grimace a bit. She didn't ask me a question. She made a statement. Why am I so stupid?

Kaija doesn't seem to notice my stupidity. She smiles once more, and exclaims, "Great! Grab those eggs, and pour them into the frying pan. We'll stir them around every minute or two so they don't burn, and so the eggs cook up into little pillows."

She is terribly enthusiastic about this process, so instead of dragging myself around like I usually do when she wants me to do something silly, I just grab the bowl and do as she says. This might be a little bit fun, I guess. I pour the egg mixture into the frying pan.

"Now what?" I say.

"You have to stir it until the eggs become solid. They'll clump up, and start looking dry. That's how you know it's time to add the cheese and ham. Adding them too soon will make the pan difficult to clean afterward, and adding them too late will mean the ham isn't going to be warm. I'll take care of cutting up the ham and cheese while you stir the eggs, okay?"

I nod in agreement, and turn my attention to the frying pan. As Kaija said they would, the eggs being to solidify and dry up. A thought strikes me, and I get a little angry. This is actually very easy to do. My servants used to make this dish for me often. Elias was so angry about the treatment of the servants, and how hard they had to work, but this cooking thing is so easy. If this is all they had to do, I feel like we could have kept them doing it, and not have been considered awful tyrants or whatever. I jab at the eggs, sending a few bits flying out of the pan and onto the floor. Kaija didn't see this, so I stoop down to grab them, tossing them into the sink. I might be angry with Elias right now, but Kaija is, I guess, trying to help, so I swallow it down.

"Ham and cheese done!" Kaija says cheerfully, holding a plate with said nourishment piled on top. She once again seems to require a response from me, so I make an "mmm" noise. Usually she likes it when we make "mmm" noises at dinner, so I figure this is a good response.

Kaija grins and giggles again, holding the plate out to me. "Those eggs look ready for the mix-ins. All you have to do is dump them in and stir them around with the eggs. Super easy."

I take the plate from her and do as I'm told. I watch the cheese melt into the eggs, binding them with the ham chunks. It really does look and smell delicious. I smile. I am glad I didn't pitch a fit. It is nice to have helped Kaija.

Kaija's head pops up over my shoulder, her hand resting on my arm. "Looks done to me! I'll go get Elias."

She disappears around the corner, and soon returns, Elias in tow. We all sit down at the table, and Kaija dishes the food out between the three of us. I glance at both of them. They have their heads bowed. This is the thing Kaija has told me is called "praying". She says they sometimes say the prayers in their heads, and sometimes out loud. I hesitate, but then I mimic them. Kaija says sometimes prayers are just thoughts, and that God hears them, so I think about Kaija, and her kindness, and how she has never hurt me. From what Kaija has told me of God, He will like that.

I pop one eye open, and see that Elias is still praying, his eyes closed. Kaija, though, is looking at me, and she looks very, very proud. I cast my eyes down, and begin eating. Kaija does not press the matter, and we finish our meal in silence.