Title: Sins of the Past
Author: E. Kathleen Roper
Pairing: Gil Grissom/Nick Stokes
Warnings: Slash, Violence, Language
Rating: R
Summary:When Nick goes missing, the team searches for him, discovering disturbing facts about his past.
Disclaimer:I am in no way connected to CBS, CSI, or anyone who actually has any real claim on the show or its characters. This is written entirely for my own enjoyment and I am making no money off of this story. I just steal the characters to torture them.
AN: May contain spoilers up through season four, but departs from canon before the end of fifth season.While this story is slash, there is far more emphasis on the case than on romance.
Sins of the Past: Part One
"Damn it, Nick, what the hell is going on with you?"
"I told you, it's nothing! I'm fine!" "You're not fine! Just tell me what's wrong and maybe I can help." "No. No, there's nothing you can do. I don't want you getting involved in this." "I'm already involved!" "Ok. Ok! We'll talk on Monday. Just go to your conference, and when you get back we'll talk. But right now, please, just go. I need some time to think." "Monday. I'm holding you to that."
He flipped open his cell phone and hit send. This time it didn't even ring before the voice mail kicked in. "Hey, this is Nick, I'm not--" Slamming the phone shut, he threw it into the floorboard. The worry he had been feeling for the past week was now edging into full blown panic and his attempts to keep it in check were failing. Pressing the accelerator to the floor, he swerved to avoid the slower traffic.
He didn't bother to slow as he pulled onto the exit ramp and the Tahoe tilted alarmingly as he navigated the sharp turn. After a heart-stopping moment he got the SUV under control again, and checked his speed slightly, though he was still going far over the legal limit. Skidding to a halt in front of the Crime Lab, he left the engine running and ran for the entrance.
Catherine was standing in the hallway, speaking with Warrick, her face angry. They looked up in surprise when he slammed through the door.
"Gil! What are--"
He cut her off. "Where's Nick?"
"That's what we're trying to find out," she said, frowning. "He didn't show up for his shift today, and no one's seen him since he stormed out of here on Friday."
"Friday? What happened Friday?"
"We'd just got back from a scene," Warrick said, "and he flipped. He was angry, yelling, not making any sense. For a second there I actually thought he was going to pull his gun on me. Then he just threw down his badge and left."
"And you just let him leave?" Grissom asked harshly.
"Hey, don't look at me," Warrick said defensively. "What was I supposed to do, tackle him?"
"Yes! If that's what it took!"
"Grissom, man, chill out! You're freaking me out."
Ignoring him, he rounded on Catherine. "One of your CSIs has been missing for three days and you haven't even bothered to find out why?"
"Now just a minute," she said angrily. "I've tried calling his cell, but he's not answering. I tried his house but the phone's been--"
"Disconnected, I know. Did you at least send someone by to check on him?"
"I thought he just needed some time to cool off. I can send a car by now, if you think I should."
"Don't bother," he said curtly. "I'll go myself."
Catherine gave him an appraising look. "Ok, but I'm driving."
"No--"
"Don't, Gil," she said warningly. "I'm worried too, and I really don't think you should be driving right now."
He didn't answer, just turned and strode quickly towards the door, not looking to see if she was following. When he reached his car he paused for a moment before climbing into the passenger seat. She was right; he was really in no condition to be driving at the moment. Getting in a wreck would be of no help to Nick.
When Catherine got behind the wheel, he didn't even glance over at her. Picking up his phone from the floorboard, he punched in Nick's number again and listened anxiously as it connected. When the voicemail picked up again he muttered a curse before shutting the phone off again.
Giving him a wary look, Catherine asked cautiously, "What's going on?"
"I don't know," he answered truthfully.
"These past few months Nick has been happier than I've ever seen him. He wouldn't tell me, but I assumed he was seeing someone. Then two weeks ago he changed. You've been closer to him than anyone recently. What happened to him?"
"I don't know," he said again.
"Problems with a woman?"
"No. There was no woman," he said in frustration. "Damn it, Catherine, can't you drive any faster?"
"Yes sir," she muttered, but she did increase the speed slightly. "Can you at least tell me why you're so upset about this?"
"I just have a bad feeling."
"A bad feeling?" she said incredulously. "You don't act on feelings."
"This time I have to," he said quietly. "This time I have to."
Catherine had never seen him this agitated. Gil Grissom had always been a rock, someone solid and dependable who always looked at the evidence first and never let feelings get in the way. And he had a bad feeling about this. It made her nervous. She pressed the gas pedal closer to the floor, wondering vaguely when she has slipped into the Twilight Zone. First Nick blows up, then Grissom starts acting on 'feelings.' What's next? Warrick taking up ballet?
They had driven in tense silence for the past several minutes; the only sound was that of Gil opening his cell phone to dial Nick's number repeatedly. It was obvious that he no longer expected an answer but he focused on the task with a single-minded determination.
When she pulled up in front of Nick's condo she scanned the lot automatically, looking for Nick's car. It was nowhere to be seen. Before she had even pulled the keys from the ignition, Gil was out of the car and sprinting towards the door. She hurried to catch up. When she reached his side he turned to glance at her, his usual implacable expression firmly in place. Somehow this disturbed her more than his earlier panic.
Raising his hand, he knocked sharply on the door. "Nick, it's me. Open the door." After a tense moment, he knocked again. There were no sounds from behind the door.
"I can go see the super," Catherine said. "Get a key."
Gil shook his head impatiently and plucked his key ring from her hand. Flipping through the keys, he found the one he was looking for and inserted it into the lock.
She looked at him sharply. "Why do you have--" she broke off when he raised his hand for silence.
He pushed the door open slowly. Even though it was only mid-afternoon, the inside of the condo was almost pitch black, only a faint hint of light coming from behind the thick drapes that were pulled shut over all the windows. The silence was oppressive.
"Nick!" Gil yelled, his voice shockingly loud in the silence. "Nick, are you in here?" When, after a moment, there was still no answer, he reached through the doorway and flipped on the lights.
The first thought that flashed through Catherine's mind when her eyes had adjusted to the sudden light, was that the condo was neat, almost too neat. She knew that Nick was a tidy person, but this kind of order bordered on the obsessive. The carpet in the living area was freshly vacuumed, lines still visible in the thick pile from where the vacuum cleaner had passed over it, marred only by a series of footprints. On the coffee table a pile of magazines were stacked neatly and aligned perfectly with the edge of the table. The tile floor in the dining nook shone as though it had been freshly waxed.
All this only served to make the signs of chaos stand out in harsh relief. The overturned chair by the table. The half-eaten plate of food, flies circling lazily above it. The small table by the door that had been knocked to one side, with the bowl that had obviously sat atop it lying nearby, coins spilled around it. And Nick's cell phone, open, abandoned in the middle of the floor.
"Signs of a struggle," Gil said distantly. "He's not in there, probably not since Friday. We need to get a team in there, check for evidence..." his voice trailed off and he turned from the door. He only made it three steps from the door before he dropped heavily to the ground and buried his face in his hands.
"Drink this, it will help," Catherine said, pushing a steaming cup of coffee into his hands.
"Don't, Catherine, please," he said wearily. "Just don't."
"Don't what?"
"Don't try to handle me. I'm fine." But still, he took a sip of the coffee. It was too hot. But she was right, it helped. On some idiotic level, it helped.
"You didn't look fine a few minutes ago." She stared at him searchingly for a few moments. "How long have you and Nick been...involved?"
He considered denying it but eventually just shook his head. "Three months."
"Three months?" she asked, surprised. "You've been dating for three months and no one noticed?"
The corner of his lip twitched slightly in a half-hearted smile. "Five months, actually," he said with a trace of bitter amusement. "He just waited a while before telling me that what we were doing was actually 'dating.' I had just thought...I don't know what I thought."
"So, what did you think of the movie?"
"The premise was interesting, but they took some truly indecent liberties with facts and history." Nick was obviously fighting back a laugh. "Come on, Gris. If you want history, watch the History channel. This was quality entertainment!" "I'll just take your word for that," he said, smiling slightly. They had reached the door to his townhouse and he unlocked it before turning back to Nick. "Coming in for a drink?" "No, not tonight. I've got an early day tomorrow." Despite his words, he made no move to leave. "You know, Gil, I've been thinking. At first I was mad when Ecklie took me off your team, moved me to a different shift." All trace of laughter was gone from his voice and his eyes were dark and serious. "I'm not mad anymore. In fact, I'm very happy that you're not my supervisor anymore." He realized just how close Nick was standing and a voice in the back of his mind pointed out that he was missing several vital clues. He stubbornly chose to ignore it. "Why's that?" he asked, somewhat annoyed that his voice came out sounding rather breathless. "Because, if you were still my supervisor, I couldn't do this." Suddenly the space between them was gone, and Nick was kissing him. 'Case closed,' the voice said, before he firmly told it to shut up. The kiss was soft, cautious, and over far too quickly. After a moment, Nick stepped back and looked at him questioningly. "Okay?" he asked. "Yes," he agreed, wondering distantly why the kiss had stopped. "That was...okay. It was just rather unexpected." "Unexpected?" The laughter was back in his eyes and his face creased in a wide grin. "I see nothing unexpected about it. I've been dating you for months now, Gil Grissom, and if you haven't realized that, then I would say you've been most unobservant. In fact," he said, his voice dropping down to a sultry purr, "I would say that I've been quite restrained by waiting this long." "Yes," he said carefully. Regularly scheduled dinners, conversations, phone calls, the occasional movie...it was quite possible that this could indeed be considered dating. "I think I'll have to be more observant in the future." And he pulled Nick in for another kiss, this one of a much more acceptable length.
Catherine smiled slightly. "Courted for months and didn't even realise it? Actually that does sound like you." She sighed and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "We'll find him, Gil, I promise."
Sara was surprised when she got the call asking her to come in; her shift didn't start for another four hours. But, never one to turn down overtime, she grabbed her gear and headed to the address she'd been given. The address sounded vaguely familiar, but she couldn't quite place it. It was possible she had worked a case there before.
Pulling into the lot, she scanned the scene. Two uniforms were standing outside a door marked with crime scene tape. She spotted Warrick standing over to one side, by Catherine and Grissom. Four CSIs? It must be a bigger case than she thought. Walking up to join them, she lifted an inquiring eyebrow. "So, who's our vic'?" she asked by way of greeting.
The three fell silent at her words and Grissom slowly clenched his fist, crumpling the paper coffee cup he held, the coffee spilling out and over his hand. Throwing down the cup, he turned and stalked away, his jaw tight and his expression unreadable.
Sara stared after him, her eyes wide. Turning back to Catherine and Warrick she asked cautiously, "Someone want to tell me what's going on here? And where's Nick, I thought he was working this shift?"
Catherine hesitated a moment before speaking. "Sara...this is Nick's condo. He's missing. No one's seen him since Friday, and there are signs of a struggle. Shit..." she muttered, staring after Grissom. "Listen, Sara, Warrick will fill you in on the details. I'm going to go drive Gil back to the lab. The scene should be cleared anytime now. Call me the second -- and I do mean the second -- that you find anything." She turned and hurried off after Grissom.
"Nick's missing?" she asked Warrick disbelievingly, her eyes still wide. "Does this have anything to do with him blowing up on Friday?"
"You heard about that?"
"Yeah," she said. "Everyone heard about that. Not exactly the kind of thing that goes unnoticed." She shook her head slightly and tried to reach for the cool detachment she felt with most cases. She wasn't finding it. "What do we know?"
Warrick looked just as disconcerted as she felt. "Not much. Not enough. We'll know more when we can get in there and start processing the evidence." He frowned slightly and shook his head. "He left work on Friday, halfway through his shift. He was angry, about what, I don't know. He didn't answer his cell, but we didn't know anything was wrong until he didn't show up for his shift today."
"Any chance he came home, trashed his own place, and went somewhere else to cool off? Girlfriend's maybe? Catherine seemed to think he was seeing someone."
"No, doesn't look that way. I've seen Nick mad, not often, but enough to know that if he was going to get mad and trash his place, he'd do a good job of it. Not like this."
"Any idea who it was that he was seeing?" she asked, still holding on to the hope that he was just lying low somewhere. "We'll need to talk to her."
"I don't even know that he was seeing anyone. If he was, he was keeping it real quiet, never said a word to me. Just because the guy's happy all of a sudden, doesn't mean there's a woman involved."
Just then the officers by the door signalled that they could go in. Sara stared at them for a moment and then swallowed nervously. "Ok. I guess this is it. You ready?"
"No," he said grimly. "But let's do it."
TBC
