Water Child

- RK

Author's Note: Hello Fanfiction.net! Yes, I know, you must be getting sick of me. Maybe I should have just kept to myself as I had before? I feel really guilty that I post up all of these topics and yet find little time to update them. However, my summer load is gradually getting lighter and so I shall make due with the free time that my schedule permits. Forgive me if I don't post as quickly as you want me to, and remember that I'm always working on the stories little by little (if not on the computer file, then in my head). So yeah, I hope you enjoy this! -Sumi

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Disclaimer: As always, Rurouni Kenshin does to belong to me, yadda yadda. Though I do like doodling a bit and have my own -mini- manga, I'm still poor as ever so don't even try to sue me. Concerning those who wish to post my work elsewhere, please consult with me first. If I find you plagiarizing from me, and I do go on the web a lot -hell, my major is in web design-, your life is mine, haha. If I don't catch you, then know that you're a pathetic-pathetic-PATHETIC person who has stooped low enough to the despicable act of stealing another's work. Can you live with the guilt? CAN YOU? -insert evil laughter here-. Other than that, have a nice day! OH-hohoho.

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Water Child

Part One: Departure

Be like water.

Be formless.

There are no restrictions, no limits to what you can achieve.

For you are formless.

No matter the situation, no matter the place, you will succeed.

For you are water. For you become your surroundings.

You are the water child.

I awoke in a start, sitting up in my futon with beads of sweat lining my forehead. I clutched at my robe and took two deep breaths. My father's words echoed in my mind. Though he had died several years ago, my home felt no different than it had before. His clothes were well kept, his swords gleamed with polish, and our kitchen was stocked with his favorite foods. The only thing that was missing- that made it obvious to me that he was no longer with us- was his scent. He had a strong fragrance, bold with the slightest hint of hickory and perspiration.

But now the house held only the gentle aroma of jasmine, which had once belonged to my mother- but was now under my possession. It had been her favorite perfume, she would keep it in a small drawer, and the glass bottle would nestled in a bed of tissues. The liquid was the lightest shade of lavender, and around its top was a simple yellow bow. It matched my mother's kimono, I recalled. I would bury my face in her lap when I was tired, sad, or just wanted to be near her. With her long, tapering fingers she would thread her hands through my black-blue mane and begin to sing. Soft words, soft hands, and motherly warmth- she had it all.

I ran my hands beneath my eyelids, catching the few drops that had emerged. I sighed and leaned back into my pillow as the tears continued to fall. It was all over now. My parents, my loving parents, were gone. The dojo was in shambles and it had not had a student since Yahiko had left. I was aging, now. I was twenty years of age. I was to become married, Doctor Gensai told me. He said that it wasn't proper for a woman my age to live with only the company of a man whom was not her husband, nor her kin.

Kenshin, Himura Kenshin. The sweet, violet-eyed wanderer to which my heart belonged. If only he had understood me, if he had understood my emotions. For him, I possessed only love and compassion. He worried me so many times and silence always frightened me. If the dojo were to be silent, then it could mean a number of things. That Kenshin was out at the market, or that he had finally begun drifting again. It was always in the back of my mind, that consistent nagging. I never knew what to think of Kenshin. I loved him, and then I hated him. I loved him for the way he made me feel. I hated him for the way he made me feel. The worry, the tears, and the sleepless nights when I knew that he was only a door down from me- it was killing me inside.

If only he had accepted me. Then perhaps- just perhaps, I would not be leaving by Doctor Gensai's wishes. My father always told me to be formless, to take on any situation in any method required. I would give up on Kenshin and go to Kyoto in search of a new life. I would try to forget everything. The memories with Megumi, Sanosuke, Yahiko, and my dear Kenshin. They were no longer a part of me.

"I am Kamiya Kaoru," I murmured. "I am Kamiya Kaoru. I am Kamiya Kaoru of Kyoto."

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I undressed myself and ran a moist cloth against my skin. I could not take a bath, in fear that Kenshin would awaken. Once I had dried myself with a towel, I glanced at my loose fitting outfits before choosing a maroon kimono, which had emerald and golden flower prints. After tying on a yellow obi around my waist, I fell to my knees.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I had grown up as a tomboy. Cheerful, carefree, and strong. Just like my father. But if I were to change, then my appearance would be altered as well. I reached up with shaking hands and undid my azure ribbon, waves of raven hair falling on my shoulders. I picked up my comb and began slow, long strokes. It shone in the early morning sun until it was silky shag against my back. I pushed back my bangs, holding them in place with two decorative pins. I stared at my reflection. I looked almost like my mother.

At the thought, I opened the drawer to my right and pulled out the bottle of perfume, as well as a compact of rouge, and another of blush. I applied them with the gentlest touch. My lips took their shape with a shimmering pink outline. My eyes seemed brighter, almost bigger. My cheeks were a slight crimson, contrasting with my slightly tan skin.

The change was visible, clearly. I had never worn cosmetics, nor had I been given proper instructions from my past mother. But it doesn't matter now, I thought. I would have time to learn when I'm alone.

I rose to my feet, which were held in pure white tabi socks, and picked up my ribbon. I tied it to the nail on which my calendar hung from. It still said May 14, I realized. I let out a dry laugh and tore the page away. I turned on my heels and picked up my bag. Taking one last look around my bedroom, I slid open the shoji doors.

I kept my face down as I pulled on my platforms. I could hear Kenshin hard at work, doing the laundry.

"Ohayo- Kaoru-dono?"

I stepped out from the dojo and began walking towards the gate, my back to Kenshin. I heard his feet shuffling towards me, and then his hands held my elbow gently. He spun me around, his eyes traveling over me. I stared at him impassively, though my heart was pounding.

This is the last time I'll see you, Kenshin.

"Kaoru-dono, are you going somewhere? Why do you have your bags?" he asked worriedly. His grip tightened.

Don't forgive me, Kenshin, for I cannot continue. It hurts too much. It hurts.

"Kaoru-dono! Answer me!"

"I hurt because of you," I burst out, my eyes narrowing as I pulled away from him. He let his hand drop in surprise. He gaped at me, at a loss for words. "I hurt because of you, because of everybody. So I'm going to leave. I'm going to go get married, I'm going to go live another life, but whatever I do it's going to be without you so just let me go!" I screamed. I began to walk faster. Kenshin sprinted behind me.

"Kaoru!"

He didn't put -dono after my name, I thought vaguely.

"Kaoru! Please, don't go!"

I ignored his calls and continued forward. I could feel his hands grip the sleeve of my kimono and I spun around, my eyes blazing.

Don't ever forgive me, Kenshin.

With a resounding slap, my hand whirled against his cheek. He said nothing, his face tilted to the side.

"Goodbye, Kenshin."

I continued, tears coming to my eyes. I hurriedly wiped them away in fear that he would catch up to me once more.

But he did not.

A part of me wanted to run back to dojo, embrace him, apologize, and forget my decision.

But just as he hadn't, I did not.

"I loved you, Kenshin. I loved you."

With those words said, I persisted towards the harbor. I would not return to Tokyo. I would not turn back.

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Author's Ending Note: So? How was it? Should I continue or not? ^.^ Oh, and about To Which The Wind Blows, I think that I'll be posting for it sometime this week. Comments and criticism is much appreciated.