In this story Will and Sonny live together. Will gets an opportunity to study at New York University. I have taken some clues from the TV story line, but taken it into a different direction. I hope you all like it!
(…Will's POV…)
While I wait for the spaghetti sauce to cook I stare at the letter on the table. I don't read it as I know it by heart after reading it eight times. I look up when the door opens and Sonny walks in. He throws his keys on the table and I smile as I have come to love that sound.
"Hi."
"Hi."
His hands lock around my neck and his kiss is soft and sweet. He leans his head against my forehead and I have to close my eyes as his chocolate brown ones seem to look straight into my soul. While he whispers I feel his breath on my face:
"I missed you."
I pull him close and hide my face against his neck, unable to answer him. I hear him sniff in the air and moments later he pulls back and peeks in the pots and pans:
"Spaghetti… now I love you even more."
"I love you too."
My answer is soft and suddenly breathing seems hard. I reach over to grab the letter from the table and I fold it quickly and stuff it in my pocket. He turns around and walks past me towards the shower:
"Give me five minutes and I am ready to eat."
I nod and watch him walk away. The letter seems to burn in my jeans. I pull it out again and sigh while I unfold it. Should I tell him or should I wait a little while? Will he understand or will he be angry? I am lost in thought when I feel his arms around my waist while his wet hair drips into my neck:
"Let's eat, I'm hungry."
The letter is lying open next to us and I know he is reading it because his body seems to tighten. We just stand there against the kitchen sink. His chest flush against my back and his arms around me. I am not moving, waiting for what he has to say. He suddenly lets go and coughs before he asks:
"What's that Will?"
I don't turn around and try to find the right words to explain this. But before I start he speaks again, louder now than before, and I hear the anger locked up inside the words:
"New York...?"
I bow my head and suddenly I feel how his hands turn me around:
"Look at me… what is that about?"
"Sonny, can we please sit down and just talk about this?"
He silently sits down on one of the kitchen chairs and I pull mine next to his. I reach out to grab his hand but he pulls back, his eyes black while they seem to shoot daggers my way.
"Sonny, this is an amazing opportunity. I will have the best supervisors and it is the best university for English studies. This will be an amazing start of my writing career… Sonny…"
I whisper his name as his piercing eyes seem locked onto mine. He shrugs and asks:
"So you are actually considering this?"
I nod:
"Please try to understand what this would mean for my future, Sonny."
"Your future… YOUR future…."
He is shouting now and stands up from the chair so he can pace through the kitchen. I stand up as well, unsure what to do or what to say. He stands still and asks with his back towards me:
"The course is three years Will, you do know that right?"
My answer is a quiet whisper:
"Yeah."
He turns around and nods:
"So that's it? This is it? You are leaving and I don' get a say?"
He walking to the door but before he can open it I turn him around and push him with his back against it:
"Sonny, please listen to me…"
He raises his eyebrows but doesn't move. I look into his eyes which are usually a perfect liquid brown when they look at me, but now they are black and I miss the sweetness I have gotten used to:
"Sonny, this is a unique opportunity and I really want to go. It will set my career of in a great way. And I love you and of course I want to talk to you about this. I would love for you to come with me, you can open a bar there and we can start an amazing life in New York."
I suddenly feel how he pushes me away, while his hand reaches for the door knob:
"I can't move to New York Will, my life is here, my business is here, my family…. Everything is here in Salem. Why can't you study here at Salem University…"
"Because Sonny… in New York are some of the greatest professors, there are great opportunities there, the program is the best in the world in this field, and they asked me Sonny, so they believe in me and they think I have talent…"
It is quiet and he looks away. I take a deep breath and hear him say:
"So you made your choice…"
His eyes look up and I feel mine tear up, and although my voice is shaking I answer:
"Yes… I have."
The moment these words leave my lips he is out of the door and all I hear is the sound of the door banging closed behind him.
(…)
The airport is busy and I try to find my way to be in time for my flight to New York. I asked everyone to let me go on my own as I could not have handled everyone being here except Sonny. The night of the fight is now three week ago, but I relive it every so often. He did come back that night, but only to ask me to leave the apartment as soon as I could. So that night I packed my stuff and left, and since then I stayed at my grandmother's house. We haven't spoken anymore and I didn't think I could miss someone so much. I know this was my idea, but I had hoped he would be willing to come with me. I was planning on doing this together, not on doing it alone. And even though I am very happy with this opportunity, I am unhappy. For a moment I consider to stay in Salem, to find Sonny and make it up to him, but then I hear the lady on the intercom announce my flight and I take a deep breath while I walk towards the gate.
(…Sonny's POV…)
"Hi Sonny…"
"Hi Dr. Evans."
She sits down on the chair next to me and I try to pretend I am actually busy with paperwork. But she just waits and eventually I give in and push the papers away while I look up at her.
"How are you, Sonny?"
"I'm great."
My eyes look away from her kind face and I know that she knows that I am lying. She waits again for me to continue and I remember a conversation Will and I had about how she always did that. My hand goes through my hair and I sigh:
"Well… great might be too big a word."
She nods:
"He left this morning."
The moment she says that I feel the knife in my heart slowly turn around. I lean my elbows on the table and hide my face in my hands trying not to break down in the middle of the coffee house. I feel her hand on my arm and after a while I put my hands down and look at her:
"I miss him so much…"
She nods again and squeezes my arm before she lets go. We just sit there quietly for a while and then she asks:
"Would you like my opinion?"
"Yes please…"
"I think studying at New York University is a great opportunity for Will and I understand he wants to take it. But I think you two should have talked about it… I heard what happened and I think you haven't really discussed it… I understand you want to stay here, this is your business and you work hard to make it all work out, but if you would have talked about it, perhaps you could have found a way…"
I am suddenly angry again:
"To go with him? Does anyone realise what you're asking of me? This is my life and my career we are talking about…"
"And Will is talking about his career, honey?"
She always says honey to Will and since we started dating she is also using it to address me.
"I know… I know… it's just… it's just complicated."
She nods and reaches out to hold my hand:
"Sonny, I am not judging you… or Will. But he stayed with me for the past weeks and he is not happy. He left this morning because he believes it is good for him, but he is not happy about any of it. And here you are and you keep biting your lip and blink your eyes to keep the tears locked up inside. You are not happy either and I wish I could help both of you…"
I hold her hand between mine and take a deep breath:
"Me too."
(…)
I walk into the apartment and try not to feel the emptiness of the rooms. I decide not to eat as I am not hungry these days and curl up on the couch while I zap through the TV channels. I try to make myself comfortable and while I am arranging the cushions my fingers feel something stuck in between. I pull it out and stare at a little stuffed animal that I recognise as Snuffy. About four months ago Will's mum brought two boxes with Will's stuff that was still at her apartment. As he was moved in here with me she thought he would like to keep it here. It was packed with old report cards, and things from his youth. I remember how he went through it and said to me:
"I told you I had quite a difficult childhood, these things are just bringing back memories I don't really need to have back."
I remember sitting down next to him and pulling him against my chest while saying:
"You don't have to go through it, we can just close the boxes and hide them in a corner somewhere."
But then he found Snuffy and he teared up while whispering:
"We have been through some messed up times together."
Eventually, little Snuffy was the only thing he took out from the boxes before we stuck them in the corner of our closet. This little stuffed animal had been his little friend when his mum and dad where not able to give him a safe and comforted feeling, and it just found his place in our living room. And of course I had to find it today. The tears I held in all day at the coffee house are now rolling over my cheeks while I squeeze Snuffy against me. And for hours I just lie there, staring blankly at the TV without seeing anything, reliving happy and sad moments I spent with Will. And I decide to sleep on the couch again, as sleeping in our bed where we made so many memories, is still too cruel.
(… Will's POV…)
I hug my grandmother while she pulls me close:
"Hey you… I missed you."
I let her kiss me and smile when I let her know I missed her too. And I really have. Her advise is always so valuable to me and even though we Skype regularly I am happy to spent some time with her face-to-face. In the car on the way home she orders me to tell her everything and I tell her about the amazing program at university, the friends I made, and how much I need a break after six months of studying. And while I am talking I feel my heart pounding in my chest as we pass the coffee house… Sonny's coffee house. I suddenly forgot what I was talking about and when I look at my grandmother she smiles:
"The coffee house is doing well…"
"Oh…"
I really want to ask how Sonny is doing, but I don't know how to ask it without sounding desperate. But as always she knows what to say:
"Sonny is still running the place…"
"Oh…"
"T is working for him now and they seem to get along very well."
"Oh…"
I hate myself for not knowing what else to say. I don't know whether to be happy or sad that Sonny seems to be doing great. Wasn't this what I wanted? I left, didn't I? We pull into the drive way, but before I can get out of the car my grandmother grabs my arm:
"You are not over him yet, are you honey?"
I bite my lip and then I whisper:
"I don't think I'll ever be."
That's all we say about it and then we move on. I get settled and we go over to my mum's for diner. I am so happy to see everyone again, and over and over again I tell people about my life in New York. But every now and again my eyes meet my grandmother's and we both know everything is not as great as I say it is.
(…)
My break is already half over and I decided to just go for a walk. And now I find myself in the park, staring at the blue sky, trying to stop myself from going over to the coffee house. I finally convince myself it is better to go home, and I quickly stand up and turn around. I immediately feel someone walk straight into me and we can both barely stay up on our feet.
"I'm so sorry…"
The moment I hear those words my heart skips a beat. And when we look at each other I see how all the colour in his face disappears.
"Will…"
"Sonny…"
Then it is silent, a slightly awkward silence, where I am trying to think of something to say but my brain seems to stop working completely. And then I realise this is the man I always felt comfortable with, with whom I could speak about everything. He is the first one to speak again:
"You're here…"
"Yeah… holiday break."
He nods and his fingers go through his thick dark hair. I realise I still have a soft spot for his hair and try not to stare at it.
"You OK?"
He asks me the questions but looks away, as if he is afraid to hear the answer.
"Yeah… you?"
He just nods, staring at the ground. My eyes wander over his body and I can't help thinking he has lost weight. And his eyes are different. In my memory they are deep brown, and they would sparkle all the time as if someone lit a candle in them. But now they seem dull, and they are slightly too dark. He seems to get uncomfortable by my stare and shrugs:
"I have to go… shift at the coffee house."
I nod, unable to speak as there is so much I want to say. Before I know it he is gone and slowly I walk back to my grandmother's house.
(… Sonny's POV…)
My heart is pounding in my chest as I try to find my way to my office. I close the door behind me and sit myself on the floor with my back leaning against it. I knew he was back in town for a few days as Abi told me yesterday. But I was not prepared to see him. And yet there he was, and I realise I am just as in love with him as I have always been. His eyes are just perfectly blue, like the sky on a summer's day, and his perfect face still makes me breathless. Why didn't I tell him how I feel? Why didn't I beg him to work this out? To go back to my place? Why didn't I just kiss him right there in the park?
"Sonny…?"
I quickly wipe my eyes and stand up from the floor.
"Sonny… are you OK?"
I open the door and Abigail stands in front of me.
"I saw you run passed me while I was ordering my coffee and you looked terrible."
She walks into my office and closes the door. I just shrug and bite my lip.
"Sonny…?"
"I saw Will…"
Her big eyes tell me she understands everything even though I just spoke three words.
"Oh Sonny."
I wrap my arms around her waist while she pulls me in for a hug. She strokes my back trying to comfort me and I whisper softly:
"I love him so much Abi…"
"Where did you see him…"
I try to calm myself down and take a few deep breaths. Then I pull back and we sit down on the couch in the corner of my office.
"At the park, I bumped into him…"
"So… what did he say?"
"Not much… I wanted to tell him how much I love him and how much I miss him, and it just didn't come out… you know?"
She nods and I sigh:
"I'd give anything to have him back, Abi…anything…"
(… Will's POV…)
After my ten days in Salem I am back in New York. And even though I am busy with my course work and I am trying to spent time with my friends, I feel empty and the city seems dark to me. For some reason I was hoping for Sonny to come and find me before I would leave for New York agaon, and we would make up and everything would be fine again. But unfortunately, he didn't show up and I left Salem on my own. I cannot get him out of my head. I keep remembering our meeting in the park and now I know exactly what I should have said. I feel an elbow against my ribs:
"Will…?"
"What?"
"Are you OK? You seem distracted basically all the time…"
I look at Jason, a good friend, whom I met during the course.
"Sorry."
"That's OK, but it is not an answer to my question though…"
I smile and shrug:
"What do you want me to say?"
"Anything you like, but I think it has to do with a guy and I think he lives in Salem… am I right?"
"Yeah."
And then I find myself telling Jason about Sonny. About how happy we were, about our live together, about how we met, and how lucky I was. And I also explain him about our fight and how it all ended. He nods understandingly and takes a sip from his beer:
"Even though it has been six months you still love him, don't you."
I stare into the little candle flame on our table and let the silence be my answer. Then I feel my phone ring and I reach to pick it up. I quickly find my way out of the noisy bar and answer the call:
"Hello?"
"Will, honey is that you?"
I recognise my grandmother's voice and I know her well enough to hear that something is wrong.
"Grandma… what's wrong?"
"Will, honey, something happened…. Are you alone?"
"Yes… no… I'm at a bar with a friend… just tell me."
"Sonny"
And then my phone is dead. I scream in frustration and then for a moment I stand frozen. Something is wrong and it must have to do with Sonny. Jason walks out of the bar and looks at me. I point to my phone and stumble:
"It's dead… Sonny… my grandmother."
"Will? Can I do something?"
I am not sure what to do myself. Their phone numbers are in my phone so I cannot get to them. And all I can think off is going to Sonny… going home. I look at Jason and I wave at his car at the opposite side of the road:
"I need to get my passport and then I need to go to the airport."
In about an hour I am checking in. No suitcase, no clothes, just me. And two hours later I am standing at Salem airport waving for a taxi. A driver picks me up and I ask him:
"To the coffee house Common Grounds please?"
The driver turns around:
"Can't do I'm afraid. It is burned to the ground and no-one is allowed near while the police and everyone are trying to sort it out."
I look at him and feel slightly dizzy while I process that in my head. Sonny… I need to find Sonny.
"To the hospital please…"
The driver is quick and about 10 minutes later I find Cameron at the nurses' station at the emergency ward:
"Cameron…"
"Will… what are you doing here, I thought you were in New York…"
"Sonny… where is Sonny."
He looks at me slightly puzzled. And I have to grab the desk to remain standing up.
"Where is he?"
"He is not here Will… I haven't seen him here."
"Then where is he…"
I raise my voice as I feel the hopelessness take a hold of me. Suddenly I hear a voice:
"Will…"
I turn around and throw myself in her arms:
"Where is he grandma… my phone died… and you said something was wrong and then you said Sonny's name… and the driver said the coffee house burned down… I can't find him."
She strokes my back, but I don't want to be comforted, not yet. I pull back and look at her waiting for her to answer me:
"I thought your phone went out… and I was worried because I thought you would find a charger and call me back."
I look at her bewildered:
"I didn't think of that… I just… I just have to see him, tell me where he is."
She grabs my arm and pulls me along:
"I'll take you to him."
(… Sonny's POV…)
I look at my father who is talking on the phone to one of the policemen on the site. My mum and Maggie walk in with tea and Uncle Vic comes out of his office to join us. For a moment I hide my face in my hands, while the realisation that my business burned to the ground sinks in. My father squeezes my shoulder and says:
"Luckily no-one was hurt and you have a very good insurance."
I nod and try to swallow the lump in my throat. I stand up and just stare out of the window and suddenly I remember how Will and I enjoyed a barbeque in the garden once. I remember how in love we were and how, when we thought no-one was looking, we kissed under the big tree. I remember feeling safe and suddenly I can't stop the tears and I wish he was here to hold me and comfort me. We are all startled by voices and the sound of doors. I turn around and that is when I feel as though everything moves in slow motion. He is standing in the door opening, his grandmother and Hendersen right behind him. Hendersen starts apologising:
"I am so sorry, he was adamant to come in."
"It's OK Hendersen…", I hear Uncle Vic say.
It is quiet, everyone is staring at Will and at me. His blue eyes are focused on me and finally he speaks:
"You… you OK?"
I nod, still not sure why he is here, and how he got here. He takes two steps towards me and suddenly my father says:
"Let us move to the dining room."
Everyone leaves quickly and slightly nervously, while we just stand there, looking at each other. He takes another few steps until he is standing in front of me.
"You really OK?"
"Yeah… Will… what… why are you here?"
He shrugs his shoulders and sighs:
"I don't know… I just…"
And suddenly I am in his arms and he is squeezing me against him so tight it hurts. But I close my arms around his neck and hide my face against his shoulder, feeling better than I have in months.
He whispers against my ear:
"I love you…"
I can't speak and I just try to pull him even closer. I can feel his heart pound in his chest at the same speed as mine.
"Sonny… I love you."
He pulls back slightly to look into my eyes. I read the question in his baby blues and I nod. I have to clear my throat and then I say with a shaking voice
"I love you so much."
He smiles, and I am in heaven.
"Sonny, please let us work this out… I don't want to be in New York if it means I don't have you…"
I smile and I feel how his hand hides in my hair:
"And I don't want to be here without you either…"
"Please tell me we'll make it work… together."
His eyes are damp and he is biting his lip waiting for my answer. I cup his face with my hands and say softly:
"I am never ever letting you out of my sight again, Will Horton."
And then I can no longer wait and I lean forward to catch his lips with mine. It has been more than six months since we kissed, but the moment I feel the softness of his lips the world seems alright again. When his tongue touches mine I feel my knees get weak, and my arms hook over his shoulders so I can lean on him. When he lets go he sighs contently. His forehead leans against mine and his blue eyes shine as they used to. And just before he kisses me again, he whispers:
"I am holding you to that…"
Suddenly had inspiration again. Hope you all like it. Thanks to everyone for reading and liking my stories, it means a lot. Please review, I look forward to hear what you think about this one.
