A/N: Chapter replaced due to error.
Chapter One
Her eyes took in the sight, widening in apprehension.
It was not supposed to be this way. Bodies littered the ground, soaking in their own pools of thick crimson blood. Children, young adults, and even the elderly had been slaughtered so unmercifully.
She wanted to bring a hand up to her face, to cry for them, but it would have been completely useless. There was no way that she would be able to help them.
And she hated every single moment of it. She was supposed to protect these people, to help them even if her life was on the line – but instead she had been gone, trying to live a normal life and have a normal family.
She thought that she had put this entire life behind her – but she knew that he did not want to put this to rest. And she truly did not understand.
She had given him what he had wanted not too long ago – the ultimate power was in his grasp, so why was he still torturing her? She had done nothing but give into what he had wanted. He had promised her a normal life – a normal existence, and as soon as she had gotten that, he turned around and threw it in her face.
If anything it had made her blood boil.
She would not let him get away; she would make sure that he would pay for everything that he had done.
He had betrayed her.
There was no way that she was going to allow him to get away with that. And the decision she had made within that moment was final. She would simply call it back to her.
Intertwining her fingers, she closed her eyes allowing a soft sigh to escape her lips. If she were going to do this she would have to be calm, after all it would not respond to the hatred that was already running through her body.
As her thoughts cleared, she allowed the hymn to flow throughout her veins, nurturing her – giving her the knowledge that she had so willingly given away for her own selfish pleasures.
From blood to blood
Burning through the soul
A purity long forgotten
Returning the dark depths of what once was
And what will always remain
Return to Me
Passion untainted
Spirit unused
Return to Me
So that it may become one, once again
Her blue eyes fluttered open almost instinctively as a pale pink light illuminated the air, alerting her of the fact that her soul was reaching out, attempting to contact it.
It searched, looking for the purity that was most definitely tainted. She had felt empty, soulless and lifeless throughout the entire process, but that was not what mattered. She had to find it.
Long infuriating moments passed with her soul reaching nothing – but just as she had started to give up, just as she as she was drawing in her soul, something powerful – tainted and evil struck it, causing her eyes to widen and a loud whimper of pain to escape her mouth.
She immediately fell to her knees, grasping her chest tightly as her soul flew back into her body knocking the wind from her. Her eyes watered considerably, as that same dark aura swarmed within her soul, trying to fight its way out.
But she could not let it.
She had an obligation, and as soon as she was able to purify the object that was within her soul – she would continue to feel as though she had only part of her soul.
But she did not expect it to be so tainted, so evil. The aura that he had to have channeled throughout it seemed to be the cause of this agony that was fiercely spreading its talons throughout her body – it was so dark and full of hate.
Her body immediately lurched as she felt him trying to pull it back from her, trying to remove it from her soul. But she could not let it happen. If she did then he would come and attempt to kill her. She immediately clutched her hand to her chest tighter and gritted her teeth.
"Not this time Naraku." She muttered determinedly, doing her best to cleanse her soul of all impurity.
And just as she had started to do this, her soul calmed, finding the center of what was once tainted.
To her relief he did not seem able to taint the entire object. The object's soul itself was still pure, and if only she were able to seal the impurity deep within it, everything would be fine.
But that would mean – her eyes snapped open at once as she thought about what would come to be.
And for the first time she was scared.
She knew that it should not have been that big of a deal, after all she would not be able to remember anything about what had happened, and it would be a permanent part of her soul.
If she did not remember any of the mantras, any of what the scrolls had taught her, then she could be hunted and killed. She would not remember the family that she had started to make – or the peaceful life she had grown to have. She would be hunted, and without remembering anything about herself – she would not know how to use her magiks effectively against her enemies.
Cursing inwardly she closed her eyes and concentrated. She simply had to do this. There would be no room for argument. Even if she had to run in fear of her life, it had to be better then allowing him to hold the most powerful weapon that could wipe out an entire race if he commanded it to.
Closing her eyes slowly she reached within its soul, drawing out its purity, working to get it to wrap around its impurity. And as she did this, she slowly felt herself falling within the white abyss that was soon to become her memories.
And as the purity coiled around the evil – she could not help but cry.
She would not be able to remember a single thing – it would almost be as if she were losing her life that she had worked so hard to build.
The hot blinding tears streaked down her face as she felt every single last memory that she had acquired disappear, as her soul turned inside out along with that of another's.
It just wasn't fair. But she knew that she would not be able expect anything more. Her soul was being turned around – as though starting over once again – as was the simple object that had been the cause of all of her problems.
That blasted jewel that she had worked so hard to protect only to give it up and then take it back.
If only she had not been so impulsive as to put herself before the needs of others – this would not be happening. And although she would not have had the family that she wanted, that she had attainted only months before – it was for the best.
And even though they would not be able to have her anymore – the tears immediately ceased as she felt her entire soul flip around, and completely start all over again and fall into a beautiful white abyss of nothingness.
And if she had remained conscious she would have heard the voices that had immediately surrounded her – and she would have been able to feel the pulsating of her own soul, as it became one once again.
~*~
Alone.
She felt so terribly alone as she drifted through the completely empty void, trying to remember what part of her was missing.
But all she was able to draw was a complete blank.
She did not know anything about herself or who she was, all she knew was that there was some part of her that was missing – and she had to recover it. No matter what lengths it took for her to regenerate that part of herself, she had to know what it was that was missing from her life.
She felt sad, as though some part of her had been wrenched from her reach so completely.
And even though the beautiful white serenity continually attempted to calm her, she could not help but feel saddened. The part that was missing was part of her soul –
Was she really able to say that she had a soul? She knew that somewhere within her being memories were apart of the soul, and if she had no memories then was it really safe to say that she had no soul?
The thought itself perturbed her greatly.
And as if sensing her distress, the white serenity reached out and wrapped itself around her, calming her.
And at the feeling the comfort it was trying to bring her, she smiled and allowed her eyes to drift close, feeling that calming spirit flow through her body – though her blood until she completely slumped – her body going limp.
She wanted to believe that she had never felt so relaxed in her life – but that would be untrue – because she did not remember.
She hated it.
She hated everything about it.
She did not know how long she was going to be stuck in this empty white void, she did not know if she would ever remember anything ever again.
All she knew was that she was stuck a very calming, very serene white void with no memories. That and she felt extremely depressed.
She wondered inwardly what had been the cause of her loss of memories, and why exactly it caused her to loose any and all memories that she had of her past life.
But something inside of her told her she should not have to worry about what was in the past because – the past was the past and there would be nothing she could do to change that. All she would be able to do was to look to the future, and hope that it brought her peace and prosperity.
She could not help but let out an undignified snort at the notion. For some reason a peaceful life did not seem in the least bit appealing to her.
Almost as though there was something inside of her that she had to remember. Almost as though she had to recover an important piece of her soul that needed to be grasped in order to live life properly. But would she truly be able to live her life properly if she ever got out of this void?
Then a thought struck her that caused her body to go rigid and heart to stop beating momentarily.
What if – what if she could not wake up from this deranged form of sleep? What she was dead?
She could already feel the strange prickling sensation behind her eyes as that thought raced through her mind. She never knew that when one died they lost every single memory that they had acquired throughout their lives.
And even though she felt that strange feeling coursing through her veins, alerting her of that fact that her notion was not true – she still could not help but cry. If she did wake up, she would not have any memories.
And she absolutely hated it.
It just wasn't fair. She didn't do anything to deserve getting her memories taken away from her – or at least she thought she didn't do anything.
She could practically feel her blood start to boil as these thoughts ran through her mind, causing her be ripped to shreds inside. And once again the serene white void that she floated through wrapped itself around her being, attempting to calm her once more.
And as if realizing this for the first time it was almost as if it were talking to her – letting her know that she should not give up because – once she woke up from this simple dream everything would be all right. Whether she had her memories or not she would be able to handle it because, she was strong, and all she had to do was believe in her self.
Smiling brightly she and sighed crossed her arms over her chest, hoping and wondering that when she did make it out of the void that she would be able to retain her memories again.
That thought in itself made her happy beyond all belief.
But there was still the fact that she was alone and floating within a white void that she knew nothing about.
'Come to think of it – how did I come to be in here? What is this place and how will I be able to get out?'
And as though some higher power were focusing simply on her, something called to her, reassuring her that everything would be all right. Her ravenous thoughts calmed considerably and she slumped once again, allowing her body to float freely among the never-ending void.
'Now, all I need is something to do,' the girl started looking around the empty void, 'or better yet, something to think about.'
~*~
She did not know how long she had been floating within the void, but the only conclusion that she could allow her mind to come to was that she was completely and utterly bored.
She had realized that there was nothing even remotely interesting to think about – and whenever she did think, all she was able to do was to think about what would happen when she escaped from the void, and what occurred in her past.
But she had soon found out that it was hard to think about what would happen when she thought about the future, and that it was twice as difficult to think about the past. And the more and more she thought about it, she knew that quiet frankly, she did not have a past anymore – and she would never be able to retrieve it.
So, she had simply allowed herself to slump forward and just stare into nothingness.
But the more she stared, the more she wished that the void was some sort of different color other than white. Even black would have sufficed, after all she would not be able to actually see anything, and it would be more like she was sleeping.
But then – if it had been black, she wondered if it would have been as comforting. Usually black meant something dark and desolate, and it most likely would have made her even more depressed than she already was – but at least it would have been less boring.
'I feel like eating myself alive.' She thought as she twirled a piece of hair around her finger. Or at least she thought that was what she was doing. During the time that she had been floating throughout the void she had found that she did not exactly have a body either – but she could feel something there.
She honestly wished that she could see it as well – but she knew she shouldn't have hoped for much.
Sighing inwardly, she felt the void wrap around her once again, expecting it to bring some sort of comfort to her once again – only instead she was rewarded with pain.
Immediately she shrieked, slapping a hand to her hip, and clenching her eyes shut.
"Damn that hurt." She muttered, aware of all the pain that was now coursing through her body. She rubbed her side furiously, attempting to rid herself of that sharp pain. Whatever had caused it to happen she didn't know – but it hurt like hell.
As she opened her mouth, a sigh escaped her lips, and she urged herself to open her eyes. And as she opened her eyes, she had expected to see that never-ending white void that she had spent – however long it was – floating within it.
But instead, all she saw was blurry blotches of green.
So she did the first thing that came to her mind – she screamed.
Almost at once she heard scraping and a high shrill voice shouting something, but she couldn't quite make it out. And quite frankly she just didn't care.
All that she really cared about were the colors. There was green all around her, blue, white, yellow, and brown. It was absolutely enchanting.
Her breath had caught in her throat at the sight, and as her vision slowly began to clear all the colors melted together, becoming clear once again. It was then that she was aware she was in a forest – a clearing to be exact.
She sat up slowly, looking around at the trees, the sky, and the dirt – at everything around her. And she could not help but smile.
Everything was just so enchanting – and it was definitely more beautiful than that white void that she had been floating in earlier. But then – a frown appeared in place of her smile, as she thought of how she still did not remember anything about her past.
She sighed audibly, running her hands up and down her arms. It felt as if a huge chunk of her was missing – as though there was a huge hole in her heart.
And she immediately felt tears well up in her eyes – and for the first time since she had been within that void – she heard her own choked sobs. Did she honestly sound pathetic when she cried?
"Calm down. It's not the end of the world, normally people see that everyday." A gruff voice from in front of her stated
"You don't know what I'm feeling." She immediately responded, not even realizing that she had about a dozen eyes on her.
"Keh. Like I care anyways."
Immediately her eyes narrowed and looked up, glaring into the eyes of man that said that. Only they weren't exactly the eyes of a man because – most men did not have golden eyes, or silver hair.
Or – furry ears?
The woman-child cocked her head to the side, looking at him with interest now. It was definitely male – if his gruff voice was any indication, but it was strange how this male had long hair, and furry ears.
"Why the hell are you staring? Never seen a hanyou before?" He asked rudely, crossing his arms over his chest as though offended.
"If I did," the girl started kindly, " I wouldn't remember."
The girl sighed sadly, looking down at her lap and twirling a lock of hair around her finger. She now found herself even more depressed than she had been before. She didn't mean to seem rude to the guy – it's just his appearance just struck her as odd.
Sighing audibly, she looked back up at him and smiled apologetically, before attempting to stand. But as soon as she did, pain shot up her side and she cried out, causing everyone around her to shrink back in shock.
"Damn it woman! Do you have to be so loud?" The man hissed flattening his ears against his skull. But she didn't hear him. The pain that had been shooting throughout her side had not allowed her to. Tears fell from her eyes, streaking down her pale creamy skin.
At the sight of her tears, the man immediately forgot his hurting ear drums and knelt down beside her, watching her frantically as he tried to do something – anything to get her to stop crying.
To his companions it must have been a humorous sight because as soon as they saw the hanyou fall his knees they immediately started laughing.
"Hey, hey calm down – there's no reason to cry." He stated as she clutched her side in pure misery.
"But it – it hurts so bad." She whimpered, taking in long shaky breaths.
The hanyou sighed, shaking his head slowly before helping her sit up without causing any damage to her body. The sharp intake of breath was the only indication that she had felt any pain, but other than that she just seemed a little shaky.
After she seemed to initially calm down, the hanyou sighed in relief before helping her stand. She seemed a little wobbly at first, but as she was finally able to stand again, she smiled warmly at him, nodding in appreciation.
"So, what's your name?" She asked quietly, eying everyone around her.
And as she looked at them all, she could not help but notice the striking resemblance that each of them held with each other. They all had long silver hair, bright golden eyes, and strange colored markings upon their faces.
The markings themselves changed with each of the persons that stood around her, but it was still so beautiful. And for a brief moment, she found herself wishing that she could have hair as long and as beautiful as theirs.
"Inuyasha." The hanyou said suddenly, after a brief moment of silence. The girl jumped almost once, but immediately regretted it as that same sharp pain coursed through her side, causing her to latch her hand onto her side once again.
"I'm sorry what?" She asked through gritted teeth, trying her best to remain standing and not look like a complete weakling.
He merely scoffed in annoyance.
"You asked me what my name is and I am telling you. My name is Inuyasha. What's yours?" He asked almost irritably. But as he asked that question, she felt all of her pain leaving her body, replacing it with the heavy sorrow of depression.
'Of all the things he could have asked – why did it have to be my name?' She thought sorrowfully, trying her best not to cry. It hurt her to know that she would not be able to remember a single thing about her past – not even her name.
And she couldn't just make one up off the top of her head, because it wouldn't be her. It would still feel as though part of her were missing, and if she wanted this guy to know her – she would want him to know the real her, her real name. And if she said anything else, then it would be like a lie.
So she would simply settle for the truth. After all, even if she didn't know her name, it was certainly better than lying to him.
But – as she had opened her mouth to tell him that she did not know, that she had no memories whatsoever of her past, she immediately closed her mouth and smiled at him once again.
"My name is – Kagome."
She didn't know what exactly caused her to say that, but as she did, she could not help but notice that a small piece of her soul seemed to fall back into place.
Thus – she smiled again.
