Disclaimer: I don't own True Blood. But I do own Elsie.

So, I have been reading a butt load of True Blood and Vampire Diaries (specifically OC-centered) fanfics, and I just absolutely had to write one because I absolutely cannot understand the rationale behind these OCs…especially if they are self-inserts/girl-from-another-world. I know I need to get on my HP fanfic, but I was attacked by this little drabbly-plot bunny that just would not leave. So, enjoy!

TBTBTBTBTBTB

Elsie woke suddenly with a large gasp of air, her heart beating weakly, struggling to breathe, tasting copper on her heavy tongue, and pain stemming from everywhere in her body from the tips of her toes to – seemingly – even the dead cells of her hair. The pain seemed to stem not just from her physical body but also from the deepest reaches of her soul, which she didn't even know was possible until then. She could just barely make out the arms holding her up and the hand gently clasping hers. Her eyes rolled around as she lay on the ground, debris digging into her back, terrified and in pain. She struggled to open her eyes to see where she was and what could have possibly have led to such soul-aching, encompassing pain when last she knew, she had been getting ready for bed in her college dorm (which had so many security measures it was ridiculous). She finally succeeded in just opening her eyes, catching the site of total destruction and a worried face, before she succumbed to the pain and fell back into unconsciousness.

TBTBTBTBTB

The next time Elsie awoke, she was blissfully pain-free; there was just the slightest – and the oddest – feeling of somehow being stretched and out-of-place, a feeling that transcended any physical sensation. Her eyes still closed, she lay in the softest, most comfortable bed she's ever had the pleasure to be in, and tested all of her muscles and limbs, delighting in flexing her muscles with no hindrance. She sighed in content, pushing back the rising anxiety and confusion of where she was and what in God's good name could have happened to lead to her previous experience. She was going to enjoy the comfort and peace for as long as she could before she had to face the world.

Then suddenly, she remembered her roommates. If she had ended up in such a situation, what about her roommates, who had been with her at time? Had they been harmed? Her eyes shot open and she nearly jumped out of bed before buckling at the weakness of her knees.

Searching the room for any clues, she was surprised, confused, and slightly fearful to find herself in a completely foreign bedroom. What was going on…?

After stabilizing herself, she walked to the connecting door, which she assumed led out of the room. Taking a deep breath, not knowing what she would find on the other side, she opened the door and stepped out to find herself in a lavishly but elegantly decorated living room in which two people – a man and a woman – were talking on the couch. Elsie stopped and observed them, unsure how she should handle the situation. On the one hand, they could be kidnappers discussing all sorts of nefarious plots and diabolical plans for her. On the other, they helped her when she was hurt and in pain, and left her in comfort.

What to do, what to do?

Feeling intense curiosity and the need to know about her roommates, Elsie forwent her normal indecisiveness and embraced the recklessness that she often vainly tried to suppress.

"Excuse me, but where am I? And where are Rachel and Gina?"

The two on the couch looked up startled, before the blond-haired woman leapt up with a cry and dashed over to the startled Elsie while the man stood up and walked over with a smile on his face.

"Oh Elsie, I'm so glad you're alright! We were so worried, you know? For a second, it seemed like Godric's blood hadn't worked," the blond-haired woman exclaimed as she enveloped Elsie in a warm hug.

"Elsie, do not do that ever again. You gave us a right scare," the blond-haired man said as the woman stepped back to allow him to give Elsie a hug and a ruffle of the hair.

Elsie looked back and forth between the two with a bewildered expression on her face.

"I'm sorry, but who are ya'll again? Have we met? And, please, will you please tell me how Rachel and Gina are? Did they get hurt in whatever accident I was in? Can I –"

"What? What do you mean 'who are ya'll'? How can you not know your own brother and sister, Elsie?" The blond woman interrupted with a concerned expression as the man's smile fell right off his face.

"Elsie, it ain't nice to play those kinds of jokes, especially after a near-death experience," Jason interjected sternly.

"I'm – I'm sorry, but I really don't recall ever having met you guys before. And what did you mean 'near-death experience'?!"

A moment of silence passed as they all looked at each other, the blond couple worried as they realized that Elsie sincerely had no idea of who they were while Elsie became increasingly frightened and worried. She started shaking and her breaths started coming faster and faster.

Oh dear Lord, I'm surrounded by some crazies who kidnapped me and expect me to believe that I have amnesia and am related to them. I don't even look like them, for goodness' sake! I'm not even white! Elsie thought, as she looked at the worried faces of the two before her .

"Hey, hey, calm down Ells. It's gonna be okay. We're the Stackhouses; we'll figure something out. We always do," the man attempted to soothe. Elsie just stared at him incredulously. She couldn't figure out if this man was being serious – and if he was, what are the odds of her meeting a real person with the actual last name of "Stackhouse" – or if he was insane.

The woman, seeing her expression sighed. "Oh dear. Let's sit down as we talk before you have a panic attack. Breathe. We'll figure this out," she said as she gently grabbed Elsie's shoulders and guided her to the couch where Elsie collapsed. "Now, what is the last thing you remember?"

"Hm…pain. Lots and lots of pain," Elsie replied hesitantly, unsure if she should trust this woman and play along or not. She decided not, and embraced the recklessness again. "Look, that doesn't matter. I know I'm not amnesiac. I know my name is Elsie Pak and I remember my family and background. Frankly, I think it's ridiculous and pathetic that you expect me to believe that I'm related to you when I'm not even white! Now, here's the deal. You're going to tell me where Rachel and Gina are, you're going to let me go and give up on whatever convoluted and evil kidnapping scheme you have going on here, do you understand?"

Stunned silence followed her speech before the man and woman seemed to get even more concerned.

"Elsie, sweetie, calm down now. We're not kidnappers, sweetie, and we're not trying to lie to you. I think, before we continue this conversation, you should go to the restroom and wash up, don't you?" The woman said softly, worry and fear seeping into her tone of voice. Elsie sighed. Unbelievable. They're still going along with the amnesia scheme. That's so ridiculous. I know who I am, and some white girl named Elsie Stackhouse is not it. Shrugging, Elsie got up and headed to the door that the woman gestured to. She slipped into the bathroom as the couple in the living room exploded into a whispered conversation.

TBTBTBTBTB

"Jason! What are we going to do? Do you think she healed improperly from some type of brain trauma? I mean, our sister thinks we're kidnappers! And that she's Asian! What the heck?!" Sookie whisper-shouted at her brother.

"Look Sooks, I'm in the same boat as you: clueless, worried, and terrified for Elsie. We'll have to wait for your vamps to wake up to see if they've seen anything like this. Meanwhile, we'll do what we can to jog her memory," Jason replied shortly, stressed. "By the way, good plan with the bathroom. Maybe her seeing for herself that she's not who she thinks she is will help."

"Lord, I hope so," Sookie sighed, her blue eyes fixed on the door with worry.

TBTBTBTBTB

As Elsie headed to the toilet, she passed by the mirror with unseeing eyes when she noticed something out of the corner of her eye. Her hair was blonde. It was a very pretty, natural blonde, but that was not the point. The point was that it should not be blonde. It should be black, and wavy, and short. Her kidnappers must have dyed her hair for whatever reason…but that didn't explain the sudden length. Or the sudden change in her eyes and face that she could see at first glance. She looked like a completely different person. In fact, she didn't even look Asian anymore.

Suddenly, she felt an unease in the pit of her stomach that had nothing to do with pain, the worry over her friends and her own situation, or her kidnappers.

Hesitantly and uncertain of what to expect, Elsie slowly turned to look in the mirror fully and gaped in stupefied disbelief. Not only was her hair long and blonde, but she was – some way, somehow – white. And her body was the body she was familiar with. She appeared to be in someone else's body…

Shaking her head in disbelief, she tried to rationalize it away. Maybe there was a woman on the other side, and the mirror isn't really a mirror, like in those prank videos on YouTube she liked to watch. She tested her reflection, lifting one hand then the other. Slowly, then faster. She jerked to the left suddenly. Then jumped and leapt forward. But no matter how hard she tried to shake the image off, the girl in the mirror flawlessly followed every single movement.

Okay, so she now had long, blonde hair. And, if her mirror image is to be trusted, is now a white girl.

Oh my God (and if there ever existed a time in which she could use the Lord's name in vain, now was it)! She's in someone else's body! She was a body snatcher!

Elsie once more shook her head, pinched herself, slapped herself, splashed her face with cold water, rubbed her eyes, and nothing changed the image before her. Instead of the curvier, chubbier, and taller figure she was expecting, she was short (5'3" was her estimate) and slim. Her brown eyes and pale skin had been replaced with blue eyes and tan, sun-kissed, freckled skin. Her face was all wrong; she had a cute, slim nose and high cheekbones. Her face was – can you believe it? – delicate! Everything about her was delicate! She looked like she could be knocked over by a strong gust of wind, whereas before she had been sturdier.

Worst of all, she could see the resemblance between this image and the two people in the living room.

What in the world was going on?! How was any of this possible? Was she dreaming? Is this real life?

And with that, Elsie fell over in a dead faint with a thump.

TBTBTBTBTB

So, I don't know if I will go anywhere with this, but I had to at least get the beginning of this out of my head. Elsie is not based on me, aside from one major point: if I were in the TB-world I would leave Bon Temps ASAP and avoid vampires for as long as I could. That's something Elsie and I both share. Oh, a secret desire for mischief and fun, which Elsie would actually put into play and act since she thinks she's dreaming/hallucinating.

Yes, TB is full of hunky supernatural characters, like Eric and Alcide, but I honestly do not think a romance with sex-on-two-legs is worth the drama and pain that Sookie gets pulled into.

Also, GO READ BITS OF SUNSHINE by Terans-DinosaurCostume! The story is amazing and funny and so, so sweet. You might find bits of Clarissa in Elsie, but I'll try to minimize that.

Cheers!