"Did you know if you ejaculate inside of a girl you might get a baby?"
Oliver choked on the soda he hadn't quite managed to swallow yet. He sat up coughing, grimacing at the accidental carbonated flushing he'd accidentally given his nasal cavity.
"What?"
William nodded very sincerely, still watching the previews of the Disney movie they'd put in the DVD player. "Jake Stuckman's parents got him this book called Facts of Life and it all about how if a man and a woman do it, they can get a baby. But you knew that, right?"
Oliver made a mental note that Jake Stuckman was never allowed over. "I did know that. As you may or may not recall, you are my baby."
"I'm not a ba—" William froze and a few kernels of popcorn fell out of his mouth. He turned a horrified gaze on Oliver. "Wait. You… did… that with my mom?"
Oliver couldn't help but laugh. William was at that wonderfully confusing age where he understood general concepts but didn't necessarily apply them to personal situations. Because Oliver had never been in his life as his father at the same time that Samantha was there as his mother, William had apparently failed to make the very obvious connection. "You just said yourself that's how it works."
William made a disgusted frowny face. "Dude, that's gross."
"Dude, that's life," Oliver said, lounging back into the couch.
A few more previews went by and then the movie started. William sat quietly, staring at the screen. Oliver, having already seen this movie a hundred times as a kid himself, had almost dozed off when William's voiced startled him back to wakefulness.
"If you knew how babies are made, how did you not know you had a baby until last year?" William's eyes were now focused on Oliver and it was clear he'd been silently thinking about this for a while.
Oliver cleared his throat. "Well… umm… it's not like—like a vending machine where every time you put money in, you expect to get something out. Sometimes you get something. Sometimes you don't. Plus, most of the time, we used, uh, we used protection."
"Protection?" William asked.
"Protection. Stuff you use if you don't want… if you're not ready… if you're not planning to have a baby." Oliver winced at the words. William may have been a surprise, but Oliver didn't want to give him the idea that he was unwanted.
"Oh! You mean like condoms!" William chirped.
Oliver wasn't sure if he wanted to kiss or curse Jake Stuckman's Facts of Life book.
"Yes. Condoms. They protect you from diseases that you could get through sex and from having babies. Condoms are very important when you're ready to have sex." A thought struck Oliver and made him blink hard several times. He cleared his throat. "You—you're not ready, are you?"
William's eyebrows almost merged with his hairline. "What? NO! No. I—I was just curious."
"So there aren't any girls that have caught your eye?" Oliver prodded. "Maybe made you feel a little funny?"
William shook his head hard enough to make his hair fly. "No!"
Oliver sighed and relaxed. At least it was out there and William felt comfortable asking questions.
"I'm too young, any way." William squinted at Oliver and tilted his head. "How old were you the first time you had sex?"
"Oh look! I love this scene!"
