It has been the worst New Year. Just the start of New Year and life has taken away one of the greatest people in her life.

Yes, I do, I believe

that one day I will be where

I was right there,

right next to you…

She knew how great they would be together, yet life has to be in their way. New Year and an accident has occurred. New year and the brake pedal wouldn't work. New Year and her loved one's trapped in unconscious state. She blamed herself on why did they have to go to this stupid date, and not just stay at home, have some good coco. But no. . . Life had to be in their way and took Chandler away from her.

And it's hard

The days just seems so dark

The moon, the stars

Are nothing without you

Fortunately, he's just in a coma; unfortunately, he is in a coma. Her happy days seemed over, for no one was their to give the joke of the day, no one to tell her how much she shines as bright as the moon and stars, no one to shine bright in her once-again dark world.

Your touch, your skin

Where do I begin?

No words can explain

The way I'm missing you

Day One (in the hospital) and she's already thinking of possibilities — overthinking. She missed their cuddles at night, at the Central Perk, at home. She missed his presence: the jokes, the little stupid-yet-cute actions, she missed a lot from him, yet she just can't identify which or what they are because she knew at some point, some of his actions annoyed her, but sometimes, she wonders what it would feel like if he does those actions again. Maybe she misses all of him.

All these feelings are crapping her up and she knew she couldn't hold it anymore. The only person she knew she can cry out all these tears is him, and yet, how can she? But who can stop her anyway? She sat on his hospital bed, careful with the rubbers connected to him, and lied down beside him, hugging is unconscious, pale body as she broke down, wishing he'd wake up and that all these is just one big joke. Wishing until she finally falls asleep.

Can I lay by your side?

Next to you, you

And make sure you're alright

I'll take care of you

I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight

Day 5 and it was very sweet of her to bring him flowers. She'd read him the book he wasn't able to finish, and tell her stories about how much the gang misses him. She'd tell how and when Joey cried in his audition because he wasn't there for him, how Ross is back with that depressing "hi", and how Rachel annoys Phoebe with "Has he woke up yet?".

I'm reaching out to you

Can you hear my call?

This hurt that I've been through

I'm missing you, missing you like crazy

Day 13 and she dreamt of him, so alive, yet so … unfair. She thought it was unfair that we can only have what we want only in our dreams. Why is it that it has been days and he still won't wake up? The doctors have been telling her "good news" that day by day, his healing gets better, and that he is in a good state… or better describe it as "slightly better state". What is the good in the news if it isn't what I wanted to hear? She thought.

She walked towards his bed and held his hand. Not so long later, she felt a tiny action… or maybe a twitch of some sort coming from her hand. Her eyes enlarged, her mind wakened a little more, and she shook his shoulder, calling out for his name.

But still, no response.

She doesn't know if she's going crazy or if her mind was just playing tricks on her, but maybe he's woken up. Maybe he can hear her, but he just can't respond, and because of that, she called the doctors again.

The doctors, though, didn't believe her. A doctor informed that maybe she just needed rest and that she needs to go home, take a bath, sleep for some hours, and eat a proper diet. She declined and held her lover's hand, calling out for his name, saying "Please, please, twitch or rub your thumb in my palm or jerk again. Please. Please wake up."

But still, no response.

You told me not to cry when you were gone

But the feeling's overwhelming, it's much too strong.

And because of that, she broke down. Once again. The doctors gave her the space she needed, and like what she mostly does, she lied down beside him, hugged his now-thinner body, and gave him a kiss on his cheek. And in that position, she faded to sleep.

Can I lay by your side?

Next to you, you

And make sure you're alright

I'll take care of you

I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight

Song: Lay Me Down by Sam Smith