"Fushimi-chan?" Izumo's voice had a surprised undertone when he finally took the call from his former clansman—he had no idea why the other was trying to contact him, and he only picked up by the third time. "Moshi, moshi? What's the matter, ne?"

He heard some shuffling in the other line, several sighs. Was Fushimi hesitating…? Or was this just a failed attempt at a joke?

"Oi… Fushimi-chan… I'm quite busy t'day, so would you please—"

"—Lieutenant."

The simple word got the blonde pausing with his speech as he caught the other's last word, his head tilting on the side as he pressed his ears against his PDA harder. "What 'bout her?"

"…The lieutenant… She's…"

"Fushimi-chan. Say it 'lready, ne. Or I will hang this up—"

"—She's gone."

The bartender's eyes narrowed when he heard the phrase, wondering if he misheard something—but his knees were suddenly weakened, he had to lean against the bar for support.

"This gotta be a joke…" His breathy voice came out as the reply, almost unidentifiable from the normal tones he usually use. "…Don't joke like this… onegaishimasu."

The younger man on the other end just gave a prolonged sigh before he spoke, hesitation clearly evident on his voice.

"Why… should…I? Kusanagi-san… she's really… gone."

Dead silence followed after his last statement, both him and the bartender trying to comprehend things, and it will be a while before the Scepter 4 junior would break the void.

"Kusanagi-san… I… I thought you… must…. know."

Izumo heard Fushimi's voice breaking by the end of the sentence followed by a sharp intake of breath, then by the beeping from the other end as the line went dead— and he seriously thought he heard a sobbing before it happened.

Why, this gotta be a fucking lie, right?

He just couldn't believe it. No, no, no. It can't be real.

How could she die, when they were supposed to meet later? When they were supposed to have dinner? When they were supposed to go out and have fun?

How could she die, when he's about to tell her something important?

How… could she?

His just doesn't know anymore. Mikoto, Tatara… now Seri? What could he have done for life to take the people he cherishes the most… was he that bad of a man…?

And to think that he didn't even get the chance to tell this people how much he hold them dear…

Izumo felt himself slowly retreating as he crouched down behind the bar hidden from the outside world, his whole body trembling— his mind going on overdrive. A hand slowly covered his mouth as he began shouting soundlessly while the other continued to punch on the floor. His eyes cannot even bear to tear up because of too much grief, nor his body would respond to the orders of his brain.

It's killing him inch by inch. It's consuming both his mind and spirit. It's turning him into nothing.

And he thought he was numbed already by the things that happened in the past, by time, yet now, here he was drowning in an inexplicable pain.

No one knows, not even him, if he will find the strength to move or even surface in the sea of agony.

.

.

.

Or maybe he'll just lie there forever. Maybe it's for the better— so that no one he loves will be killed anymore.


A/N: I don't even know why I'm writing angst when I'm not good at it. XD Drabble done for my Izumo RP account. Hope you liked it! :3 Read and review!