Disclaimer: I do not own any of the rights to Twilight and am not affiliated to Stephenie Meyer in any way. This is merely a fanfiction that was written for readers like you. Thank you.

Stone cold grip… Ice cold touch. Fires burning my throat, that crimson drop feeding the flames…

I lunged and wasn't stopped. In the split second that I had made my next move clear in my mind, neither Alice nor Edward moved quick enough to stop my teeth from tearing a fresh wound through her porcelain skin.

I felt a noise I would only recognize in combat as a sudden numb force smacked into my shoulder. Too weak…

Two strong arms gripped my shoulders and got me free, but I launched forward again and my teeth pierced a second wound. Not quick enough…

Six arms were now fighting with me to pry me off and it had only been seconds since I had tasted her delectable blood. The more blood I had taken in, the stronger I became, even if it was a small fraction of a difference. I devoured the power, the strength, the delicacy hungrily, readily, thirsty. The family of deer I had hunted earlier this morning was only an appetizer, no, a mere crumb compared to this rich tasting, amazing—

And then it was gone and I was devastated.

I tore through the grip of my siblings, ripping and tearing, fighting and seething. This wasn't my family… my family wouldn't keep me from this heaven. They were nothing to me right now. My mindset was on finding that heaven again.

My vision was blurred as I was shaking and thrashing violently between the three who were containing me.

"Jasper—Jasper—stop," a pleading voice begged and I wasn't sure if it was my conscious or Esme.

"The couch—a table?" Voices rushed around me as I continued to fight the arms that held me tightly. My vision was blocked off by Carlisle's back as he rushed in to move Bella away from me. I snarled and ripped toward Emmett, who forced me down.

"Carlisle—there's still blood on the—" Alice—my wife… my beautiful adoring wife—her panicked voice erupted immediately, but she was far away from me, unreachable.

"Emmet and Rosalie, take him outside. Esme, help Alice!" Carlisle's voice was rushed, but somewhat calm under the situation at hand and Edward was right by his side.

I felt an arm let go of my own as Esme ran to clean off the blood and Emmett and Rosalie worked together in forcing me outside through my torment as I realized what I had done.

I tore away from them and Rosalie hissed as she back toward the door.

"I'm—fine," I gasped out through my burning throat and fires of torment ripping through my chest as I took a step forward as if to run. Contemplating my options…

"It was inevitable, Edward knew that," Rosalie spat to Emmett.

"Rose, now's not the time," he replied with equal ferocity in his voice.

I stepped forward again and closed my eyes in frustration. Why had I been so easily tempted and that had been… too easy as if… Edward wanted me to…

A quick snarl of anguish and warning erupted over Bella's cries of pain and begs for the pain to stop and that is what stopped my thoughts from Edward himself upstairs.

"I'm a–monster," my words were barely above an audible whisper even for a vampire. I have done this before, I have been this weak before and we've fled, we've left, but Alice was practically on top of me warning me and reminding me that it was okay…

Sure this was her best friend that I had practically brutally murdered, but I'm not…

Am I truly thinking of blaming Alice for not coming outside and making sure I was okay? Bella was the one who needed to be okay, not me. I'm perfectly fine with a stomach half full of her blood.

"It's too late, the venom has already reached the heart by now—" I heard Carlisle's words as Edward's emotions wavered to certainty.

"This is what she wanted," Alice murmured.

There was silence for a few moments and the cries of anguish from Bella had ceased.

"She's going to be alright?" Edward managed to ask, his voice strained. There was a pause and his emotion went straight back to anguish. "Carlisle…" he seethed.

"She didn't lose enough blood for her to suffer a worse consequence. Anything broken from—well… it will be repaired with the venom."

"Charlie will have the entire town looking for her with pitchforks and shotguns by midnight," Emmett muttered, he was upstairs now too. I hadn't noticed that he had left. I glanced behind me and Rosalie was still there, bemused by the situation or by her reflection in the glass. Nothing seemed to faze her.

"Alice can—" Edward began, his voice still strained, but Alice beat him to it.

"Good evening, Mr. Swan," Alice began on the phone. "Oh nothing's wrong, I just want to borrow Bella for the night for a sleepover, you wouldn't mind, would you?" She paused at his comment and covered with, "just the two of us, no boy's allowed."

"It may be longer than one night," Carlisle began hesitantly.

"She can borrow my pajamas and we have a pull-out couch," Alice continued.

"For the venom to spread completely—she may not wake up for two days—one day, perhaps, but unlikely," Carlisle continued.

Her heartbeat faltered as Edward's silence continued. One beat skipped, then deadened and thudded dully. Alice hung up the phone and rejoined my family crowding around my latest victim. Heartbreak, anguish, anger, ferocity, worry, sympathy, empathy, and Rosalie's apathy tensely hung overhead.

That's when I ran.


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