A/N: This is the second plot bunny that I was bombarded by… It was going to be only one chapter, but I figure that just have a day of his ramblings at a time while I try to write the most important part of the second chapter…
Disclaimer: I don't own Tommy Oliver and Co… Nor do I own Power Rangers…. Even though I wish I owned Tommy…. He's such a hottie… author drools and Blackbird, her punk/rock/goth muse mops up the drool while singing S.O.S by Good Charlotte…
A look inside the mind of Dr. Tommy Oliver…
Here I am, relaxing after a week full of battling evil, just reading the Reefside Gazette, where there's another article about none other than the Power Rangers. Kinda brings me back to the old days when all you heard about on the news was about the most recent monster attacks in Angel Grove and about how the Power Rangers were responsible for saving the world almost daily. Haley is watching me closely, probably wondering why I haven't even said a word since the 'good mornin' I gave her when I walked in. But that's easy enough to explain. I'm stuck, stuck in my life. Nothing will ever be normal for the great Dr. Tommy Oliver no matter how hard I try to make it seem like it is. I'm a legend, at least in the eyes of every power ranger since I left for college. Even Connor, Kira, and Ethan think of me as some sort of super power ranger who is above all, someone who will always be there when he is needed.
Maybe it's the truth, maybe I'm not allowed to let go of my life as a power ranger and fumble through life, meeting women, marrying, even building a family of my own. How I wish I could. I bought the Spiderman 2 DVD yesterday and watched it. I watched how Peter Parker went through the same thing I'm still going through, the struggle to balance his life out. To make time for both being a hero and a 'normal' person. I guess that's why I'm thinking about it now. At least there was a good ending for him and a way to make a Spiderman 3 for Bryan Singer.
Sometimes I look back to the days before I became a ranger, when I was just an average teenager and I realize that it all was too happy. I mean, sure, it wasn't perfect, but still, it seemed that way. I remember longing for excitement in my life. For strange things to happen to me, like every other 'normal' kid in the world wants. And now, I realize that I don't want that anymore, that I want to just forget about ever being a power ranger, that I want to have my own life. I don't want to play the hero anymore. But of course, being put under Rita's spell that one day screwed that up right off. From there I guess my path of the hero started when Jason destroyed the sword of darkness.
Now Connor, Kira, Ethan, and Trent have come in. They say hi and I end up grunting in response. I'm not even reading the paper now…. Just staring off into space and thinking while sipping a cup of Haley's Best Coffee with cinnamon sticks and mint leaves, one of my favorites. Kira and Trent are looking at me. I can tell from the corner of my eye. I feel their gazes on me. They're probably wondering the same thing as Haley, even wondering if maybe the week of battling has been too hard on me and my nearly 40 years of existence. But of course it's not… I just want to have my own life again, that's all.
Not a minute after I finish my cup of coffee I set it on the table and decide that I need a walk, just a nice walk on the beach to clear my mind. Maybe when I retire I'll take up dog walking... I set a tip on the counter and fold up the paper and set it in the paper bin for someone else to read. I always end up doing that.
Not even ten minutes after my departure from Haley's Cyberspace, I've already walked to the beach and I find myself watching some young boys having an impromptu sparring match under the close supervision of who I guess is their Sensei. They're quite good and in reality they take me back to the times that Jason and I would spar after school. Man how I miss just being able to hang out with my friends. But know I know I'll probably never be able to do so again.
I ended up giving the boys some advice after talking to their Sensei for a while. They're only 11 or 12 years old. One day they'll prove to be great fighters. They ended up having to leave for because it got too chilly. Now I'm just sitting out here watching the tide come in as people walk their dogs, and elderly couples take their daily strolls. To them I'm just a nobody, just an unnamed guy sitting in the damp sand with a faraway look on his face.
Yeah, that's me alright, Unfocused, Forgetful, Thomas Oliver, otherwise known as Tommy, Doctor Oliver, and Dr. O., a man who has yet to build a family for himself or even indulge himself over the littlest things… Even my degree in Paleontology was influenced by being a Power Ranger. The sun is already setting beautifully shading the sky various shades of pink with hints of yellow, reminding me of Kimberly and Trini. Damn, why is it that I must keep dwelling on Kimberly. Even Kira reminds me of Kimberly, because of the zord. If only she knew how hard it is for me to stay focused on the battles when her zord comes flying in.
If only I could tell someone how I really feel and not have to worry about what they think of me. I think Haley knows a fair bit. She's seen the sad look in my eyes every time we get to fixing up the zords and I end up working on Kira's, just trying my best not to break down, the pain that Kimberly caused still there, the hole still only covered by a thin net and some leaves. I sure am something…
I don't even really know how to handle a relationship with a woman anymore… Haley's more of a buddy, someone you go to when relationships go wrong. I mean she's great, really nice and everything that a guy could ask for, but I just think of her as a friend. That all I allow myself anymore. No more romance, only friends. And Kat…. Well that never really worked out. She was nice but I just didn't have the time, and I still don't. I guess I'll go find a place to eat, I can't be waking up in the middle of the night and be pulled into a battle with an empty stomach.
I end up near some fish place, bumping into a brunette woman I'd guess to be about my age with a young girl of about 6 years old at my best guess, asking for a kid's meal with fish and chips, adding to my feelings of guilt about my past relationships with women. I guess I was meant to be a lone falcon flying above watching as everything happens; doing what he has to… And to think there was once I time I thought a certain crane would always be there soaring through the clouds with me.
A/N2: Please remember to Review… and don't forget, any flames will support my pyromania…
Blackbird: What the heck are you talking about Aprildawn, you haven't burned anything for the heck of it since last Fourth of July! I'm the one in need of a source of fire! I want to burn things tooo!
Author: Go put on some Heavy Metal, Blackbird… I want to do a songfic….
