Author's Notes: Based off the song "The Leslac Version" by Mercedes Lackey. You can find it at Firebird Music.

Summary: Nick and Audrey have a little conversation over dinner...

"Miss Timmond's Version"

Audrey: The HEAT Team and Tatopoulos were bound for Portland, Maine.
For they'd heard there might be mutants there and pledged to stop their reign.
Some crab was grabbing beach-goers and chopping them to bits.
Nick: It was a lobster, and it was just eating too much fish.
Just… eating too much fish.

Audrey: They went to find this lobster and prevent its doing harm.
Nick: We tried to borrow a fishing boat. Its crew went up in arms.
Audrey: Once Nick explained the danger there he found some volunteers.
Nick: Monique exchanged some words with them. We commandeered the pier.
We… commandeered the pier.

Audrey: Armed with a fleet of fishing boats HEAT prepared to net the beast.
Nick: We barely cleared the fishing docks when Godzilla showed to feast.
Audrey: Godzilla showed to lend a hand and make that crab a dish.
Nick: Again, a lobster, not that the lizard cared. He came to eat the fish.
He… came to eat the fish.

Nick: Once Godzilla had his full, he turned then to the crab.
Audrey: You said lobster.
Nick:
I know.
Nick: We cleared the docks and fishing boats before he made a jab.
Audrey: And in a breath the deed was done, Godzilla had it boiled.
Nick:
As well as half the bay's supply of fish, which had the people roiled.
Which… had the people roiled.

Nick: Randy got the bright idea to have a festival.
And have with well-cooked lobster all the fish the town could haul.
Audrey: Oh, now you're just exaggerating. That crab's Godzilla chow.
Nick: I'm a scientist, Audrey. I deal in facts…
We're eating it right now.