[Author's Note:] The thing about this novel is it is a derivative, which means it's based on a longer series. I've been working my bum off trying to find the fans of this pairing since it's fans are so pressed upon by goofy non-canon stuff online to feel outnumbered, when the bottom line really is this is as canon as I could make it based on a plethora of evidence repeated viewers of Dark Shadows easily see. (If it isn't your cup of tea? There are hundreds of stories on this site which you might like more. Please enjoy those.)

I'm also sharing it to get discussion, find folks of like-mind, and because all I was trying to do is to get everything to work out with everyone in the Dark Shadows series. I've listened to far more venting about the problem in militant non-canon pairings fans than I ever expected!

This is based on a "rare" type of creation: Interruption Story. (NO Alternate Universe.) So, if you don't know "The Pit of Ultimate Dark Shadows" you might want to start from there but you don't have to. It is done with character voices and in podcast/radio format in which I've spent a great deal of money and effort to get all the voices and audio quality correct. I need help in commentary with this project as a human requirement, and because there are too many fandoms involved for me to get any supposed "rights". I wanted a relief series for Dark Shadows and after five years of searching I couldn't find one, so I began my own many years ago. As far as I could determine, when I went down the line of all of the characters, Maggie Evans, and Kitty Soames as the reincarnation of Josette Dupres was what Barnabas Collins wanted and she him. (And I aim to have all the other characters happy as well.)

Have iTunes? Have access to Archive dot Org? Have access to the podomatic site via my profile page? As I've desperately requested of all of these other fandoms and the "shy" fans of this pairing I've scoured across google search to find? Pitch in and get chatty! Thank you.

(By the way, I had some crazy pro-Angelique lady that bugged me for a couple years and trolling me. I've also had a ton other complete strangers being rude from some kind of insecurity or whatever. My best deduction is my work is so convincing that she and others have wanted to control what I'm doing. Seriously, they have all their stories already. It's about time we had ours isn't it? ;)

Fun commentary, what you might say to a friend if you like the radio drama? Posting that is going to create more. Make it a book club experience. (In other words: Stop being so constipated to celebrate this couple. This book-in-progress is your serving of dates, figs and prunes to express your delight. Have it with a big glass of water and let loose some detailed joy about what's going on in it!)


This will start in the T-rating but is *definitely* moving on to the M-rated section. I'm testing this novel out for any required changes as I'm already looking into its publication.

Many thanks to reviewers and especially Helena, Melissa, Lisa, Veritas and Osheen for helping so much with this revision. Brightest and darkest blessings to all struggling in this sad and vocally neglected realm of Dark Shadows re-creations.

And any previous guest reviewer to the older run of this story I also welcome. I do much better in temper with feedback over silence and I appreciate the courage of the smutty people greatly. I think that has more to do with love than with sex. ;)


"Life after death is as improbable as sex after marriage." -Mrs. White (Clue 1985)

"Once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." -Sherlock Holmes

And with these two quotes, I'd like to show that life after death, and sex after marriage, is both probable, plausible and extraordinarily beyond that… wonderful.


Chapter One: The Wedding Day

As many of my friends and family knew, this was not a day they needed to share with us, but I wanted them to. I wouldn't request it, I wouldn't promote it as my beloved so insisted, but they were more than welcoming. I believe they knew what was happening. It's good to know that through all the ages we weren't as lost anymore, nor as shallow as many outside us have believed. We were ourselves now and able to live the days in more matter of fact realms, and more importantly in love.

Somehow the nervousness that had reached me earlier wasn't with me now. Perhaps it was because my bride hadn't entered the chapel yet. I anticipated her. I knew they'd worked a long time on recreating Josette's wedding dress and considering its sinister history, I was happy for a re-creation… such as my bride, Maggie Evans was. Long of almost auburn locks, velvet of lashes upon her brown eyes, and aquiline of face, did I know my Josette in her? Oh, didn't I? The reconstruction of a new dress, with new fabrics, from the original design of the old. How fitting it was. And how lovely in all of this design, the dress, the rings Willie had done so well to create for us, the home we were rebuilding together, nothing so marvelous as this re-creation of a human being: Josette Dupres.

In The Old House we'd gone over the paper work and our ghostly relation, in all his stark sense of irony, had chosen this new name and her father had approved. Oh… what did I know of these times I'd awoken into? I must allow those around me more providence in understanding these things, and I did. As I've said continually, repeatedly, I would do anything to have her and give her… myself. I kept asking her if she was sure, if she was certain. As you know my history, the history of Barnabas Collins, many things changed and often for the worse, the dreadful, and the dead. I didn't want her to change her mind later. I didn't want to disappoint her.

She gave me that beautiful smile of old and new; A nod down, a look up at me. I marvelled at her answer, "After all we've been through, Barnabas? What if I were to disappoint you? Do you think that doesn't scare me, even a little?"

Well, if anyone knows this kind of love or anything close, you can easily imagine the length this argument went on for: "But I am not worthy… but what of I?" And on and on… until:

"What did I have to look forward to that could ever be close to this?" she said, in her abrupt, laughing manner… the same, so the same of all three women: Maggie Evans, Kitty Soames, Josette Dupres.

"Think long and hard about that, Maggie," I requested, "I've been very forceful and very horrible and very ashamed-"

"-and adoring," she interjected, "and looking for me in so many other women," then with a clack of impatience, "does no one remember me? What I want in all of this? Barnabas Collins… after all that we've been through… don't you remember me?"

A breath of assurance, "I do. You understand my caution, Jo—" I stalled at her name.

She breathed and used her tender voice, "Go ahead… don't be afraid. We all have more than one name… mon demón." She smiled. It was a loving tease and I would expect to be called it for years, decades and dare I say it, centuries? I supposed I ought to get used to it.

"Josette… what I want now, more than anything is … never… never to harm you… never to leave you. As I've been guilty of so many times."

"And that was all of your fault, was it?" she asked suddenly.

I looked down upon her, adoring her in all her renewed glory and appeal to me, "I am to blame… Maggie… you must understand why I want to be careful. I've wanted Josette for so lon—"

"I am Josette." Maggie almost shouted, quickly, sharply, "if you wanted to be cautious then stop referring to me in third person as though I'm not standing before you right here. Don't you think it hasn't been hard enough for me coming to terms with that and what I want? That I want you? That I want what was never to occur according to the fool actions around us in this place? Doesn't that matter to anyone other than Pop and I? Barnabas Collins?"

She said this as a question for me to answer.

"Yes?" I asked her in return, hopefully.

She stared hard into my eyes, "I've never been surer. And yes, I believe I deserve something easier and richer to handle… with you. Do you want me to incarnate myself endlessly just to have this? I understand… none of us have been kind; none of us has sheltered each other very well… I should know. I've gotten the brunt of most of it in the end…"

I stepped toward her, taking her hands, "And never deserved it."

"And have you? I remember how hard we fought to bring me into this. And why do you think that was? Because you cared about me. You were worried I'd say no, or that I'd said no. I admit I could be childish, Barnabas. But not anymore. Trust me… I want this…" she slipped her hands up my shoulders, and coursed fingers through my hair, "And… you're making it very difficult to wait until tomorrow."

I exhaled with her and responding to her embrace with my own, fed myself with her kiss as she fed from mine. Something there created an echo of the ocean waves so much farther than either of us could usually hear and I remembered what we'd been given to make it permanent: Everlasting Life. The possibility of joy beyond centuries of time, as we'd been waiting so long for this upcoming day. Her breath pushing on my face as mine did toward her. These sounds and moist expressions of love began to create a longing and I knew what she meant. To wait for tomorrow... We pulled apart and I heard myself say,

"Need we wait?"

"Yes," she said, with an ache, "but don't believe for a moment that temptation doesn't creep toward me. It's been coming on me for ages so long."

I looked upon her face, her brown eyes… her beautiful, giving expression and I wanted to combine myself with it. Her tears began and she flatted her cheek against my shoulder as I took her head in my left hand and clutched her tightly, our embrace becoming steadfast and strong. I dropped my lids, our hearts were so close in this standing warmth and we were both mournful, and desirous: fearing for happiness.

There we were, my Josette and I, standing once again in the frame of The Old House, once new that I'd been a young man in, once easier and might be again. But more with what we'd grown to achieve in all of our calamity, and this bride anew, released from her other paramours of the long and unforgotten past, we ready, willing and fresh.

"Could I ever be worthy of you?" I moaned aloud.

"You already are… but there will be troubles we need to work through," she told me, pulling away slightly and looking up. I kissed her fervently and she accepted, stroking my ear.

"What are they?" I asked, breathily.

"You know…" she tried to tell me, "you hurt me and that hurt still dwells deep inside of me and I could be forced to surprise you one night to let it resound and understand what I need to do… to release that pain… are you prepared for that?"

I answered immediately, "I'll do anything to have you, Maggie. I'll endure anything you need to bestow on me for my wrongs to you. Please know that."

"I do," she smiled gratefully, "I do… and don't worry, Barnabas Collins. I will say the same thing… tomorrow… to make you mine."


The chapel, now repaired of its ravages through time was consecrated and blessed by a holy man of a newer sect I'd only recently been made aware of: Unitarian. Mr. Evans suggested this as a way of showing example in the multi-faceted conditions we all came through together. Ah, what many things had changed as I lie comatose over a century. Consecration and blessing was insisted on by him considering all of the unscrupulous holy men and factions wandering around Collinwood through the ages, ghostly and otherwise.

Cousin Roger, much easier going these days took a quick nodded grin at my attire, "Well it does suit you, you know, Barnabas Collins. A double line of buttons and Maggie's insistence on black velvet. All the lapels and accoutrements are quite outstanding. Now that many of our cats are out of their proverbial bags around here."

I tried not to smile but I couldn't help it, "I think you said it best, Roger. What more shame do we press upon all our wrongs by dwelling in remorse and self-pity? It's true, this only perpetuates more ills to be bred among us."

"Mnn," Roger hummed, " or what Elizabeth's Leslie questioned when it came to sources of Witchcraft. Why be so guilt-ridden and judgemental over it? Let David play with a crystal-ball, and allow ourselves a smirk at old Countess Dupres' fiddling with tarot cards. Sorcery of any kind is only bad when it slights the good in us."

"Yes," I told him gratefully.

"Looks to be a packed set of pews, old man," Roger said with a glance over my shoulder, "I can see Julia let her hair grow out again."

"That's because the good Professor prefers it that way. What a woman can choose when given the encouragement required. I pray I'm well endowed with that grace for my own bride."

"Well, Barnabas Collins" Roger said, "if you're not, I'll eat my hat."

He left me in this bemusement to sit beside his sister.


We stood at the front of the aisle, Willie Loomis, my groomsman, as well natured as I'd never imagined and Carolyn awaiting her duties as bridesmaid. Victoria had been the first choice but she then reflected how she'd rather be able to sit from afar and enjoy the ceremony in all its splendour. No doubt she'd take to writing all the details down with her appreciation of our family's history, and of course, if you'll permit me a wink, her own.

There was my cousin David and my sister Sarah in her ability to reach this far with the help of others. How it created a mist to my eyes to see her dropping rose petals to consecrate the aisle. The glow on my family's faces to accept her and wink at her as she nodded back with a gentle grace, the grace I'd tried to teach her but never had to, for she possessed it on her own.

So there we stood. I almost didn't hear the music playing as my bride stepped forward toward me, as I'd always wanted. And the lovely enactment of the past playing tricks on us: her father walking with her, the same father in spirit as she was the same spirit of my bride from so long ago. I could have blushed with the thoughts that came into my mind as I looked at her dress and thought of her tonight… without it.

But judge me not too harshly. My heart also belonged in the realm of faith that we were to enjoy each other company. To have conversations we'd never had but longed to, to share each other's concerns and puzzles sitting in front of the fire. To comfort each other's troubles that would hopefully be far milder than they had been across the years, but nonetheless important. This was what we wanted and I was happy, glad of heart to see Maggie Evans looking towards me as Josette Dupres and not with that empty, hypnotized stare she'd had when I was doing her harm. She looked at me with all the love and desire and her own happiness; that kind face and the autumn eyes of who she really was.

When the Minister asked, "Who gives away this bride?" her father announced, "Neither do I lose nor give away my daughter, but present her to make her own choice."

Ah, would Andre Dupres have said that so many years ago? I think he wouldn't have, which makes this union so much more wondrous than it would have been. And so she took my hand and I'm afraid I melted within the warmth of her eyes while the Minister was speaking his pronouncements of what the Heavens might bring, no doubt including sermons and conditions we'd agreed to be spoken, it was that earthy light I looked into as she stared into mine. What glories awaited us this evening when we would finally complete each other and discuss the endless possibilities of that completion?

At last young David presented us with the rings. This was a new concept to me, but a welcome one. I wondered when it changed that we both would wear rings rather than only her. But that was what I had wanted: Change. And with her a change of the centuries, and with I, a change to my agonizing life. I slipped the band on along where her engagement ring already was. Next she slipped a ring upon me, an odd sensation considering the one I'd been wearing for so long. I'd placed the onyx on my right hand today. I didn't want it to mar what I would see when she brought this new ceremony to me.

It was asked if there was any objection to this union. There was silence at first and then a strange occurrence… laughter. It was low at first, but then the giggles seem to catch on among our friends who had been watching us, particularly Elizabeth. Objection, they seemed to ask. Hadn't there already been far more than enough?

At last my cousin Carolyn belted out the words, "HARDLY! Get the two of them married for Heaven's sake!"

The Minister announced the vested authority he bequeathed on us to bring us that much closer and I tasted her… but more than that, for she opened her lips and guided me into a world of unspeakable passion and memories flooding over us as the vocal reactions merely grazed our ears, loud as they were. Stranger still was a certain sharpness on her teeth, the cuspids that had given me the only bite of this kind I ever willing accepted. And yet the sun streamed in through windows both of plain and stained glass. A certain relation showed us how this was possible. I felt her in my arms and her hands about me and an echo of the merest thought flittered through my mind, "Are you happy now, my love?"

I was kissing her still, but wondering how she had done this. What had happened to us as we took this step into an eternal bond for what could last as many centuries as we'd been apart? I pulled away, looking into her softly smiling eyes.

"Yes," she seemed to be telling me, "the long wait… is over."


{A/N:}Don't forget, this next chapter will be going to the M-rated pile. (which means "Dude, it's adult.") If anyone remembers all the other chapters they are revised, and enhanced. For the most part it'll go over most peoples heads. I made sure to keep it away from vulgar language. When I channeled this couple I realized they would only make diaries of their lovemaking as Thackeray or Austen might do. If you are a romantic, don't be afraid. Thanks.

I had a listing of the non-erotic chapters here, but I've deleted that. All it seemed to do was have people go through the bother of writing down what to SKIP! I guess most folks prefer the erotic chapters only. Well, I'm tired of providing helpful pointers. Most people only come here to scarf, read, jack-off and leave without so much as a "thank you". Hehehe, guess it's like one of my pen pals told me, "Sadly, people are ultimately rather petty." Oh, well...

P.S. As, I think, Joe Bob says, "...there's no plot to get in the way of the story..." except for some elements you might have witnessed in the original Dark Shadows. But for this wonderfully long epilogue, which is what many individuals want without realising it, nah. No plot. Just love, discussion and more love. The curtain has closed, but now? We're peeking behind it!