Title:The Fight Between Naruto and Sasuke
Summary: A fight in wich we see who has the better insults of the two.
Warnings: This is a crack story with some cursing. Also this story ends up being yaoi so if you don't like it the DON'T READ!
Disclaimer: Neither the anime/manga Naruto or the insults belong to me.
A/N: I got this idea when I read the insults on the internet. As to why it had to be turn into a story about Naruto and Sauke is anybodies guess. My guess is that I'm obssed. --;
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Listnen up every body as I tell you the story of The Fight Between Naruto and Sasuke.
It's a great story and it starts as team seven meets up for there missions for the day.
Team seven is once again waiting for Kakashi at the bridge who is (suprise, suprise) late again.
"Yo" Kakashi said as he puffed on top of the bridge pillar.
As was custome both Naruto and the pink thing ...err I mean Sakura yelled out the usuall your late, followed by the lame excuse Kakashi always had and the always annoying 'liar' from Sakura and Naruto.
"So whats our mission for today," Sasuke said in his cool voice that made two passing fan girls wet themselves.
"Damn you Sasuke!" Naruto yelled out.
"What it's not my fault my mere voice makes girls wet themselves."
"You know what Sasuke you're a bitch."
"Ooooooooooo!" Both Sakura and Kakashi said at the end of Naruto's insult, "Bitch fight!"
Suddelny out of nowhere all of Konoha came to the bridge and started chanting "Bitch Fight! Bitch Fight! Bitch Fight! Bitch Fight! Bitch Fight!"
"Fine Uzumaki, we will have a bit... err fight," Sasuke said and made the rest of the fangirls that had gathered wet themselves.
Upon seein such display Naruto responded with a 'fuck yea, we will'.
"Okay the rules for this match are simple," Kakashi anouced over a microphone while he took his famous book out. By this time the bridge had transformed into a stage and every one was seated in stands cheering. " The rules for the match are very simple ... no killing. The winn.."
"Wait" Sasuke said, " I changed my mind. I decided not to fight Naruto"
"Booooooooo!" went every one in the stands.
"Insted I decided to have another kind of battle with Uzumaki." He continued.
"What kind?" every one said.
" Well ... a battle of insults." He said with a smirk, because we all know he is the king of insults.
"WHAT!" Naruto yelled, as the whole crowd started cheering again.
"Well as Sasuke said we will have a batlle of insults but just to make it more interesting the insults have to rhyme." Kakashi annoced over the microphone and still reading his book. " Now start the bitch fight." He finished as a bell rang from somewhere.
"Well dead-last ladies first," Sasuke said as Naruto glared at him. This was not his kind of battle. I mean in a fight at least he had hope he could beat Sasuke. Aww what the heck. Naruto Uzumaki did not give up.
" Hmmm, " He said " I got one,
Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide youre face.
Ha! Beat that Sasuke" he yelled while beaming.
Sasuke meanwhile gave him a 'that was lame look' "Fine,
Kind, Intellegent, Loving, and Hot,
That describes everything your not." he finished with a smirk.
" Yeah , well ... I got a better one,
You may think your funny, intellegent, and witty
Also did you know your insults are shitty?" Naruto said with an even bigger smirk than Sasuke.
"Moron. You can't beat me with a stupid insult like that." Sasuke said cooly.
" Shut up and tell your insult already." Naruto said standing in that one cool pose. You know, that one cool pose in that one epesoide where he fights that one guy, for that one stupid reason to prove that one point he's always trying to prove. Yeah.You know. That one.
Good times, good times.
Ahhh anyways back to where we were.
" Fine here's my insult." Sasuke says infuriated by Naruto's 'cool pose',
"Rose are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet and so are you.
But the rose are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head!"
Upon hearing this Naruto started giggling "That was it. That was your big insult. Sasuke you suck." Naruto said as he starded laughing out loud.
"Yea well I don't think you could do better you idiot." Sasuke said getting angrier. I mean you would be pissed too if some one else was doing a cool pose that might be better than yours. Stupid Naruto and his cool pose that might be better than yours.
"Stop calling me an idiot." Naruto said getting angry himself
" I can call you whatever I want" Sasuke said " I can even call yo-"
"SHUT UP!" went every one in the crowd who were already bored with what was going on, " AND GET BACK TO THE ORIGINAL FIGHT."
"FINE!" went both Naruto and Sasuke.
"It's your turn dead-last." Sasuke semi-yelled at Naruto, becuse Sasuke doesn't yell. Some of you might argue that he does yell but he doesn't. He screams not yells.
"Stop calling me 'dead-last'!"
"Well then tell your stupid joke."
"Fine
My feelings for you no words can tell.
Except maybe 'go to hell'" Naruto yelled (yes he does yell),
who was now waaaaaaayyyyyy pissed off.
"Yeah well I have better one," Sasuke said who was also pissed and didn't know what he was saying,
"Love may be buetiful, love may be a bliss,
But I only slept with you becuase I was pissed!"
The end of Sasuke's insult was followed by a collective gasp from the crowd then with an "OOOOOOOOO"
" You...you only slept with me becuase you were pissed." Naruto said in that sad hurt voice that makes you want to go hug him and tell him every things all right, "Is that true...Sasu-chan"
"Ah..." Sasuke says as he is left spechless by his own stupidity.
"YOU FUCKER!" Naruto screamed at Sasuke.
"No wait Naruto I didn't mean it."
"I DON'T CARE ! GO TO HELL!"
"But...but"
"I SAID GO TO HELL!" Naruto screamed for the last time and left the stadium.
"But ...but. But."Sasuke says numbly "Shit" and then he followed Naruto out of the stadium.
"That was a sucky ending." some one said from the the crowd.
'Yes it was.' Sakura thought to herself, 'I better go see if Naruto is ok becuase if he isn't I can finally have Sasu-kun to myself. Yay!' and she left the stands.
Evil pink thing. Seriously.
Any ways Sakura jumped from a roof top to roof top until she rechead Naruto's apartment where yells can be heard from. She got closer to the his apartment where their words could be heard clearly.
" I already said I was sorry" Sasuke said.
"Fine. I accept your apology." Naruto's voice followed.
"Really?! A-hey why are you smilling that devilish smile?" Sasuke asked.
"Because it was my turn to say something at the fight." Naruto said
"Yeah and?"
"Well I want to say it."
"Hmmm fine you can say it."
"OK!" Naruto said hapilly but then his voice got all quiet and sexy so Sakura had to strain to hear what he ws saying even though in her mind she wasn't eves dropping,
"Sticks and stones may brake my bones,
But whips and chains excite me,
Throw me down, tie me up
And show me that you like me."
Sasuke was speechless again but then said with his own sexy voice," It will be my pleasure"
Of course that was all Sakura heard before she ran off. What she ran off to do is anybodies guess.
And so ends The Fight Between Naruto and Sasuke.
I'm hungry.
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A/N: And that was the story. Thanks for reading and if you can, leave a comment. -
