Lately.. I can't write anything..
I can't even write a cute love story about VKook..
Why?
Because Jungkook not even let me lay a hand on him this entire month.. And that's not a fanfic, I write it as my diary when I do stuffs with Jungkook. But now I can't write anything because he won't let me touch him. NOt even a kiss.. I really want to pin him down.. And messing with him.. But I can't.. He said he want to focus on our comeback stage and our concert.. Aaaarrrrggg.. I really want to kiss him..
Lately I always avoid him. I don't want to suddenly attack him because of my frustration. For making it worse, we got stuck in one hotel's room just the two of us for our staying in Japan right now. It's been 3 days since we arrive at Japan and I always sleep after get back from practice to suppress my desire when we back to our room.
Now Jungkook is practicing our new dance for our new song. We are in a dance studio. Like a lot of studio, we have a very large mirror that cover one of the wall entirely. There, we have a dispenser, a long coach, speakers, and a laptop to help us when we are practicing.
What make me so frustrating is "Why he looks so happy when others touch him?" Lately he always hang out with Jimin and Jin Hyung. They are all over the place. Laughing right there.. there.. there.. and here..
"Yaaaaa.. Kim Taehyung.. Get your ass move from that sofa and start to practice.." Namjoon hyung kick me.
"Hai… hai…" I stand up and we start to practice our dance..
I can totally focus when I'm dancing.. but when we stop dancing, my eyes start to looking for Jungkook again.. He barely talk to me today.. Well maybe we are in a fight but he usually try to talk to me even if it just about the dance move or the song. But today, he even ignore me in our room. I'm not angry, I just don't know what he is thinking right now.
"Hoesoek hyung.. I'm hungry.. do you have something to eat?" I ask Hoesoek Hyung because I'm hungry and I need to distract my mind from thinking about Jungkook.
"Nope.. Do you want to go to convenient store?" He give me a good solution.
"Sure why not.. Let's go.." I grab my wallet.
"Hey.. Buy me an ice cream and 2 onigiri.." Yoongi hyung ask me to buy something for him too.
"Me too." Suddenly all the member want to buy a snack.
"I'll pay it for today.." Namjoon hyung give an irresistible offer.
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY... We really like it when our leader buy us foods.. He really like to treat us..
"If only…..." it's not a good sign when he said that word, "the maknaes who are going to convenient store." He really like to order us (maknaes) around. He always said that It's maknae's job to help their hyung.
"Okaiiiiii..." Jungkook stand up look so happy because he is going to get foods for free and Namjoon hyung always let us to get what we want when we run an errand for him..
"Yaaa… Taehyung… You are a maknae too.. Go with Kookie.." Yoongi hyung ordering me too..
"Why me? Jimin can go with him." I really don't want to walking alone with Jungkook right now.
"Just do it.. Jimin is practicing his special move for our next concert.. Hurry.. I'm hungry.." Yoongi hyung won't let me rest if I don't do what he want.
"Neeeeeee hyung.."
I stand up and walking with Jungkook to convenient store. We walk alone.. just the two of us.. I didn't say anything on our way and I walk in front of him.. The convenient store is not so far, yet it feels like we've been walking in hours..
"Hyung.." Jungkook call me.
"..." I pretend not to hear him.
"Hyung... HYUUUUUUNGGGGG..." He called me and jump on my shoulder.
"WOAAAAAAAAA... WHy you are shouting like that?!" I smack his hand from my shoulder and It's not on purpose.
"You are the one who didn't answer me when I call you." He say it with sulking face.
Hey.. hey.. this is should be me who is sulking right now. Why you are the one who make those cute sulking face.
"What do you want?" I ask him.
"Why don't you slowing down for a bit.. You walk like we will get caught after stealing something.." He said.
Well maybe he's right.. I think I walk a little bit too fast..
"I'm hungry.." I answer it without look at him and start walk again.
Back to silent.
We arrive at convenient store and buy what our hyungs ask us.. We buy 7 ice creams, 20 onigiris, 5 cola, 2 oolong tea, and some snack. We pay it with Namjoon Hyung's card.
"Hyung.. I want gummy bear.. Please.. Please.. Please…." Jungkook ask me like a little kid going shopping with his mother.
"What? Are you a kid?" I pick a pack of gummy bear and pay it with my money because I already pay the other snacks with namjoon hyung's card.
I throw the gummy bear to him and he say thank you with a happy face.
After that we walk out from the store in silent.. This silences is killing me. Why should I walk alone with him.
"Hyung.." He's calling me from the back..
"What?" I say it without turn my back..
He didn't say anything.. Just following me from the back.. He is completely silence.. What is it? I thought he want to say something?! I just keep walking..
But..
"Hyung...Do you hate me?" It was like an electric shock when Jungkook say it.
What do you mean I hate you?!" I shout at him because I'm always angry when he said something like that.
He keeps his head down. Not even look at me. I'm pulling him into a dark alley.
But.. It shocked me even more..
"Why are you..." I couldn't finish my word..
He is crying.. What should I do?! My heart is pounding.. All my anger suddenly disappear like bubbles.. He is so cute when he is crying.. Kind of awaken my sadistic side…. Aaaaahhhhhhhh... I want to kiss him right now.. I can't believe Jungkook is crying.. He never crying outside the house except when we won those awards.. I hug him and put his face into my chest to suppress my desire to kiss him..
"Why are you crying?" I ask him when I hug him.
"Because.. you hate me.." he is sobbing.
"What? How could I hate you?!" I care his head.
"You wouldn't touch me or even look at me this entire month.. I thought you hate me now and get tired of me.."
"WHAT?" This is crazy.. He was the one who ask me not to even kiss him, "Are you crazy? You are the one who didn't want me to touch you!" I think I yelled at him just now..
"What are you talking? When did I say something like that?" Jungkook look at me with a confusing face.
"Whaaaaaaaaat... Joon Jungkook... You are really something.. Yaaaaaaaa... You're... Heol..." I shout at him..
Dunno why.. I want to punch him right now.. After I'm holding back my desire for this entire month.. Now he blame me for not touching him and don't remember why.. I don't know how to express my anger right now..
I push him to the wall and walking to the main street. I think I'm too rough just now. But I just so angry.
"Yaaaa... are you still crying?" I ask him to make sure and he just shake his head but still won't look at me.
"Let's go back.. Namjoon hyung will yell at us if we didn't get back soon.. The ice creams start to melting too.." I pull his hand.. "We'll talk about it later.."
We arrive at practice room.. As soon as we arrive, we got yelled as predicted.. I said we got lost.. But when we got yelled, Jungkook just keep silent and didn't say a word..
We keep practicing.. but Jungkook still in silence.. When we rest.. Jungkook stand up in front of the mirror.. Yoongi hyung approach him and ask him, "Jungkookie.. Are you sick?"
When Yoongi hyung touch Jungkook's shoulder, "Yaaaaaaaa... Yaaaaaaaaaaaa... Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... OIIII... Are you alright?!" Yoongi hyung's voice make us jump.
What we see is Jungkook pass out and Yoongi hyung catch him before his head hit the floor.. We run to Jungkook and Yoongi hyung..
"What happen?" Jin hyung ask..
"I don't know.. I just touch his shoulder and suddenly he pass out.." Yoongi hyung explain it..
"Let's go to hospital.." Jimin said.
"Yes we need to get him to the hospital. Namjoon. Hurry called an ambulance.." Jin Hyung ask Namjoon Hyung.
"Okay.. Wait.." Namjoon Hyung and pick his phone.
"No.. I'm fine.." a whispering voice said no.. It's Jungkook voice. "I just need some rest.." He continued and tried to sit..
"Are you really okay?" Namjoon hyung ask him again.
"I'm fine hyung.. Really.." he smiled..
"Then just go back to hotel with Taehyung.." Namjoon hyung's order.
"But.. how about the practice?" Jungkook keeps arguing..
"What practice?! Just go back to your room.." Jin hyung yell at Jungkook..
"Taehyung.. pull him and pin him down to bed.. If you need rope to tie him then tie him so he can't run away.." Now Hoesoek hyung ordering me too.
"Why me? I need to practice too." I complain. Not that I don't want to. But It's still awkward to be alone with him after I saw him crying and angry to him.
"Why?! You're in the same room!" Hoesoek hyung said.
"Neee..." I stand up and start to carry Jungkook.
"I can walk by myself.. Put me down.. I'm not a girl.." Jungkook keep struggling..
"No.. If I put you down.. They are going to nag me.." I said.. Then Jungkook didn't say a word.. He just put his head into my chest because he is embarrassing.
I carry him into our car and go to our hotel where we are staying..
