Disclaimer: I do not own Glee

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By: Cheerios Brittany

Guest articleer... it's like a balladeer….right?

Jacob, I was surprised when you asked me to write an article for the McKinley Gazelle. I always thought that was a deer, even though our mascot is the Titans, but actually it's the newspaper? I'm really happy you chose me to be in your April First issue although I don't know why you'd dedicate a whole gazelle to that wacky lady they named the auditorium after. But I guess not too much goes on in Lima, so hopefully there will be a Brittany First issue! I bet a lot more people would read it than April's issue. I think she was only popular 'cause she's old and my mom says I'm supposed to be nice to the elderly. She was kinda dumb though. I knew the right answer to the question she missed in Spanish. Santana helped me study. Lotsa people in glee club like April though. I guess I do too. She must be super awesome to have her own roller rink, auditorium, and gazelle.

Jacob, what do I do now? You told me to write a 250 word article and at first I thought that meant I got clothes, but I looked it up in the dictionary. And I thought recipes were confusing! I don't know anything else to say about April. It's March right now… April starts on April first. Oh! I remember April 1st is April Fools Day. Santana's got something planned for you, Jacob. Cow pies, yum! She's so sweet! 247, 248… The end!