A/N So here is an angsty fic from a normally happy person. I've just been reading so many angsty stories I couldn't help it! This piece was inspired by DiandraandSnape and her story 'There Goes My Life'. I hope she doesn't mind! Anywho, here is the story! YAY!


The first day I saw him with that girl my blood turned stone cold. He told me that he loved me. He said he couldn't live without me. Yet here he was, hands all over this gorgeous girl. Their limbs were a tangle and he had her pushed up against a tree. His bare chest was gleaming from the heat of the glorious summer's day. I had planned on some reading that afternoon and I was met with this image.

I stormed over to them, my face contorted with rage. Sirius looked up when I tapped him on the shoulder. He was grinning. And that was what made it even worse, the fact that he wasn't even ashamed that he was cheating on me. Bastard.

He moaned slightly as the girl sucked on a tender spot. I should be the one making him moan with pleasure! The anger was threatening to spill out so I grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him away.

'I've just got to talk to your boyfriend for a minute,' I said, glaring menacingly at the girl.

I dragged Sirius round the corner and I turned the glare to him. He frowned, 'What the fuck was that for?' He asked angrily.

'You're meant to love me!' I practically screamed making him wince, 'Yet I find you all over some tart with no care in the world for me!'

He put his hands up defensively, 'God! What's wrong with you! We never said our relationship would be exclusive! You can't expect me to date one person until, god knows!'

I was taken aback by his answer. What Son on a Bitch would think that way? 'Well that's how relationships where the two people love each other normally work!'

'Can't you get over yourself for a second and stop being such a selfish git?' He shouted, an angry glow in his eyes, 'Are you so fucking selfish that you can't even share me?'

'SHARE YOU!' I screamed in outrage, 'YOU WANT ME TO BLOODY SHARE YOU!' My voice came down to a menacing whisper, 'Are you so bloody self centered that you think I'd be happy to share you will all the bloody whores populating Hogwarts?' He rolled his eyes and snorted. 'Besides, I don't see you sharing me?' I questioned him.

He grinned, 'That's because there's no one to share you with.'

If looks could kill Sirius would be shattered into tiny little amazing good looking pieces. He was being such a bastard but I couldn't stop loving him. And when I calmed down and really thought about it, I realized it was better to share something amazing than to not have it at all.

'Okay, I'll share you if you stop putting on such a display in front of me and stop being such a bastard.' I said, finally giving into his fantastically handsome looks.

He grinned again, yet this one was much more light hearted. 'Deal,' he said and shook my hand. Then he pulled me close to him and kissed me ardently. And even though, somewhere deep inside me, something was telling me that he didn't love me at all because someone who loved you would never ask you to share them, I ignored that voice and told myself that that kiss just showed me how in love with me he was.

xoxoxoxoxox

I sat in the Gryffindor common room, trying to read my book. I had read the same page over and over again, the information never sinking in, due to the outrageous public display of affection that was going on on the sofa opposite me. No matter how many times Sirius had promised me he was going to avoid making out with his numerous girlfriends in front of me, he still went back on that promise almost every night in the common room.

It killed me that those hands – that touched my body so pleasurably and stroked my hair so soothingly – were softly caressing her body right now. And that those soft lips – that had been pressed against mine so passionately that I couldn't think straight – were now sucking at sensitive spots on her body and making her moan.

But I let him do this to me, I let him break my heart daily, because I knew, if I did, then, late at night when James and Peter were asleep, I would feel Sirius creep into my bed and place a silencing charm around it and make me feel pleasure I didn't know existed. But not tonight I had had enough.

As I told myself this a mysterious power, that was too strong for me to resist, was taking over my body and I was powerless to its demands. My emotionless face was as stiff as stone as I dropped my book and walked over to Sirius and that tart. Some people looked up from what they were doing obviously thinking 'Why does quiet shy Remus look so angry?' and 'What is he going to do next?' Many pairs of eyes watched me as I made my journey over to the two offending people who still had no idea what was going on.

I stood over them and they both looked up, from doing something I really don't want to see, as if they sensed my presence. And as soon as this unexplainable power saw Sirius' ruffled hair, red raw lips and creased clothes, it reached boiling point and I couldn't hold it in anymore.

'I CAN'T FUCKING SHARE YOU ANYMORE!' I shouted, 'IT'S IMPOSSIBLE WITHOUT GETTING MY HEART BROKEN!'

Sirius looked taken aback at this outburst and as I walked away I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head. I collapsed onto my bed when I got into the dorm, a few seconds later someone else entered.

'Well that was quite a performance wasn't it?' An annoyed voice said from the doorway.

I looked up, tears streaming down my face, to see Sirius leaning lazily on the door frame.

'I meant what I said. It was the truth,' I assured him, 'I can't share you, it's too hard for me to see you like that. It breaks my heart.'

Sirius walked over to me now. He sat on the bed next to me, his face emotionless, and leant down. His lips were so close they were almost touching my ear and were sending shivers down my spine.

'If you can't share me,' he whispered, 'then you can't have me at all you selfish bastard.'

He smirked cruelly against my ear and stood up. That smirk never left his face as he said, 'I'm sorry but I'll have to go, you see there's someone downstairs who is going to come back up here with me and shag me senseless.' He said still smirking, his intention, of course, to torture my heart, not because he wanted me to give into him and get back together with him, but for his own sick enjoyment.

He left the room and I curled up in bed trying to shut out the sounds when, minutes later, Sirius brought up his girl and 'forget' to put up a silencing charm so I heard every moan and every cry of pleasure and I knew none of them will be directed at me again. But I didn't care and I still don't because I know now that no one who really loved me would ever ask me to share them.


A/N I know everyone says it but please review! PLEASE! I will love you eternally and I always reply to comments left! Please! I'm just so polite. :D