Note: Uh-oh! Another weird one! Read at your own risk, and NO FLAMES!
Commercial Break!
Disclaimer: Slayers does not belong to me...CRUDDUMS!
"We'll be back after these messages," the typical narrator voice drawled as the mountainous landscape currently on the TV screen faded to black.
"Can you believe that, Zelgadiss-san!" Ameria protested, forcefully stuffing a handful of sun chips in her mouth.
"Believe what?" Zelgadiss asked calmly, taking a cautious sip from his steaming mug of coffee. His cheeks were red with blush, hoping Lina wouldn't catch him watching a childish cartoon in front of the TV with Ameria. It wasn't that he WANTED to be watching a "Hero of Heroes" marathon at this moment- but Ameria had been mercilessly nagging him for the past three hours- and he had given in.
"You know!" Ameria insisted, her mouth full of sun chips, "They can't cut off for a commercial break right HERE! I need to know if Hero-san will triumph over evil or not and I can't WAIT for commercials!"
"Ameria, you said that you've already seen this episode," Zelgadiss sighed, exhausted after dealing with Ameria's ultimate unreasonable-ness. "Besides, heroes ALWAYS triumph over evil in these typical shows!"
"I know that I've seen it, but I STILL can't wait!" Ameria dug her hand into the oversized chip bowl, staring at the screen impatiently as she added in an offended , "And this show is NOT typical Zelgadiss-san!"
"I give up," Zelgadiss groaned wearily, rubbing his forehead with a stone hand. He had many other things he wished to be doing, rather then sitting stupidly on this saggy couch with Ameria, watching shows that had to be MADE for Gourry's IQ level. Like...uhm... okay! He had nothing better to do! Zelgadiss moaned in defeat, taking another much-needed sip of coffee.
"Hey! Isn't that... G-Gaav-san?" Ameria squeaked, pointing at the TV screen. Zelgadiss jerked back into focus. Gaav? Why would GAAV be on TV! He looked back at the screen and found to his surprise that it WAS Gaav.
The dragon king's abnormally large nostrils were taking up over half of the screen as he roared in a loud, almost angry sounding voice, "Is normal cereal too boring for breakfast?"
"A cereal commercial!" Zelgadiss gaped at the TV screen.
"Shhh! I'm trying to watch this, Zelgadiss-san!" Ameria hissed, her interest sparked by the commercial.
"Do you need something new in the morning?" Gaav bellowed, "Well, now you can have it!" A loud chorus fanfares echoed from the TV. A mysterious looking figure appeared on the screen, surrounded by flashing yellow lights. It turned out to be none other then:
"SEIGRAM!" Zelgadiss and Ameria screamed in unison.
"-SAN!" Ameria added, her voice rising to a shrill shriek that made Zelgadiss's ears ring with painful noise.
Seigram was surrounded by a rain of little brown squares of what looked like cereal. Then, to Ameria and Zelgadiss's surprise, he began to dance. The two of them could only watch in a horrified silence as Gaav's voice began to sing in a off-key voice as the commercial continued.
'Seeeeeigram! With a graham cracker face!
His sexy little figure shakes (?) for all to see!
From what better guy could a breakfast cereal be?
His awesome tasty face comes in little sugary squares!
"Seigram Bites" are a better breakfast then pears! (NO WAY! IMPOSSIBLE!)
Seeeeeeeeigram! With a graham cracker face!
Those yummy little snacks taste so darned great!
There isn't possibly a person in the world who could hate!
"Seigram Bites" are nothing to fear!
So all around the world, let's give a cheer!
Seeeeeeeeigram! With a graham cracker face!'
The mug of coffee was frozen halfway to Zelgadiss's mouth, his face an unhealthy shade of purple as his eyes slowly expanding to the size of... PANCAKES! Ameria had a mouth packed full of chips, but was not chewing. An awful silence filled the room. Finally, it was broken.
"Pfffffft! AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH!" Ameria shrieked with laughter, spitting her entire mouthful of sun chips all over Zelgadiss. She fell off the couch, dropping the bowl of chips so they spilled everywhere. Tears formed in her eyes as she lay rolling helplessly on the ground, painful gasps of laughter escaping from her mouth.
Zelgadiss just sat on the couch, twitching slightly. Ameria laughed for the next five minutes before finally calming herself down enough to choke out some understandable words.
"Ha ha ha... Zelgadiss-san... heh heh... Wasn't that FUNNY? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!" Ameria launched back into her laugh attack, now holding her sides.
Zelgadiss shuddered, a chill shooting up his spine. He silently stretched his hand over to the remote and clicked the 'power' button. The picture on the TV screen faded from view. Ameria was still shrieking with annoying laughter.
Finally, tears streaming down her cheeks, she stopped her fit. Grunting painfully, she regained footing. Ameria put on an innocent grin and managed to speak in a voice that didn't quiver with laughter.
"Zelgadiss-san... Do you think-?" She began in her cutest voice, blinking her eyes.
"No!" Zelgadiss firmly interrupted her pleas before she could finish, picking bits of sun chips from his wiry hair, "We are never, EVER buying 'Seigram Bites!'" There was a loud 'thump' as Ameria hit the floor, unable to control herself once again.
End Note: Where DO these ideas come from? Aw, well... I made up that song myself, AS YOU CAN SEE (from its horrible-ness). Apologies for those of you that I scared- But N-O on the flames! Anyways, I like sun chips. Yeah. Uh... I guess i should stop talking::shuts up: Bye!
