I don't own X-Men Evolution characters or the idea of mutants at the movies. Old idea I know, but it's always a lot of fun.

Movie Night Madness

"Ah my favorite Thursday night pastime," Pietro sighed as he plopped into his seat. "Sneaking in the movies."

"Yeah and there aren't as many people in line at the concession stand," Fred smiled his arms loaded with popcorn, candy and drinks.

"That's cause most of the students at school are all goodie goods who stay at home doing their homework," Todd snickered. "They don't know what they're missing!"

"Well there's one usher who will be stuck in the bathroom for quite a while," Lance smiled as he sat down. "Ah the joys of duct tape."

"Hey where's Tabby?" Todd asked.

"She wanted to check out that 'Pride and Prejudice' movie in the next theater," Lance motioned with his thumb.

"Chick flicks," Todd groaned. "I'm glad we're in this theater. 'Terminator Destroyer' is ten times cooler."

"Well most females don't appreciate the beauty of explosions like we do," Fred told him.

"I thought Tabby would like it," Todd said. "I mean she loves explosions."

"Only when she's the one making them," Lance said. "Hey give me some popcorn Freddy!"

"Here you go!" Fred snickered as he threw some popcorn kernels at Lance.

"Oh man Fred no!" Lance grumbled as he brushed some popcorn out of his hair. "Not another popcorn fight!"

"Yo Fred toss me some of that!" Todd piped up.

"Sure thing little buddy," Fred smiled and did so. Todd caught most of them with his tongue.

"Hey the movie's starting!" Todd said.

"No it's just the fifteen minutes of stupid previews," Pietro sighed. "Hey since when did they start showing car commercials in theaters?"

"Oh yeah this is gonna make me go right out and buy a Toyota," Fred quipped. "Call me old fashioned but I think movies should stick with previews and candy!"

"Finally a movie preview!" Lance said. "Oh look guys it's one of those dramatic movies who's only purpose is to win an Oscar."

"Couldn't they at least show a movie with car chases?" Todd grumbled as they waited.

The next preview came on. "Oh look a love story," Pietro quipped. "Boy meets girl."

"Boy falls in love with girl," Lance sighed.

"Girl likes boy and goes out with him," Pietro said.

"Boy kisses girl," Lance said.

"Boy gets eaten by girl when he discovers she's a mutant experiment gone wrong," Todd munched on popcorn.

"Girl goes on bloody rampage," Pietro said. "And destroys half the planet of Mars."

"In other words the same old stuff Hollywood puts out every year," Lance sighed.

"Have you ever noticed in these movies mutants are always the bad guys?" Fred said.

"Yeah," Todd nodded. "That's true."

"It's mutant discrimination pure and simple!" Pietro snapped.

"But most people don't know mutants even exist," Lance said.

"Yeah we're the urban equivalent of Bigfoot or somethin', Todd said.

"Exactly!" Pietro pointed out. "When the world does find out, how do you think they'll react? And why? It's Hollywood's fault for stereotyping mutants before they even know us. Blame the upcoming mutant hysteria on them! Not us."

"The what?" Lance looked at him.

"It's going to happen you know," Pietro said. "All Xavier did that night was delay the inevitable. What's the difference if they find out now or fifty years from now? The response will still be the same. You remember their faces at the soccer game? How they turned on even Jean? Those idiot X-Men think that humans will simply accept them? They have no idea."

"Yeah tell us something we don't know," Lance said. "We're all freaks. Big deal. It'll be easier for us. We've been outsiders all our lives. We're used to it."

"You think we're outcasts now," Pietro said in a soft voice. "Wait until the world finds out."

"Geeze Pietro why are you being such a downer?" Todd looked at him. "We just wanted a night out for fun. Not a 'Why Humans are Evil' speech. We got enough of that from Magneto and Mystique yo."

"Yeah and when you think about it they weren't any different than the 'human' foster families we lived with," Lance said. "They all dumped us."

"How did we get on to this conversation?" Fred grumbled. "School and life in general depresses me enough. I don't need this."

"You're the one who pointed out that mutants in movies are always the bad guys," Pietro said.

"Don't remind me!" Fred groaned. "Can we please relax and enjoy ourselves?"

"You're right," Pietro sighed. "Sorry. But that topic really gets to me."

"Hey no sweat," Todd said. "We all got our buttons you know? Things that really get us going for no reason."

"Like you and showers?" Pietro smirked.

"Ha Ha," Todd frowned. "Very funny. Now can we get back to the movie?"

"I see something much more interesting," Lance smirked. "Check out who's down in front."

"Who?" Pietro cranked his neck. "The geeks in the glow in the dark sweaters?"

"No over in the corner," Lance pointed out. "The couple making out."

"Oh man that isn't who I think it is!" Todd exclaimed.

"It is!" Fred's mouth dropped. "Oh that is sick!"

"I want to look away," Pietro said. "But I can't!"

"I should have brought the camera," Lance laughed.

"That is disgusting what they are doing!" Todd grumbled.

"You're telling me," Fred said. "I've lost my appetite."

"Gentlemen I think it's up to us to keep up the standards of morals and decency in America," Lance grinned taking out the flashlight he 'borrowed' from the usher. "Come on."

"Oh this is gonna be good," Todd snickered as they all got up from their seats and quietly advanced on the couple.

Lance waited until they were right upon them before shining the light on them. "Evening Principal Kelly," Lance smiled.

"What'cha doing?" Todd smirked.

Startled, Principal Kelly pulled himself off of Dorothy. "Alvers! Tolensky? Maximoff? Dukes?"

"Oh great," Dorothy groaned. "Busted by the Brotherhood."

"Shame on you Mr. Kelly," Lance smirked. "What kind of example are you setting for your students?"

"All right how much do you want?" Kelly sighed, pulling out his wallet.

"Fifty bucks," Lance said.

"Each," Todd said.

"And no Friday detention for this week," Pietro said.

"And how about extending our free lunch privileges?" Fred grinned.

"Fine!" Kelly grumbled, giving them the money. Embarrassed the two adults ran out of the theater.

The boys laughed all the way to their seats. "That was the coolest thing we have ever done!" Todd laughed.

"Hey I don't care how bad the movie gets," Pietro said. "It was worth it!"

"Yeah and it's about to start yo!" Todd said happily. "Explosion time!"

"Hey that ain't Arnoldo Swartzenkoff?" Fred said two minutes into the movie.

"That don't look like post-apocalyptic New York neither," Lance said. "Guys I think we're in the wrong movie."

"What movie is this?" Todd asked. " 'My Dinner with Andre?' What kind of movie is this?"

"Oh it must be a comedy," Fred said.

"Oh," Todd said. Ten minutes later. "Freddy if this is a comedy, how come they ain't saying anything funny?"

"I dunno," Fred told him. "Maybe we should get our money back?"

"Fred we snuck in."

"Oh," Fred said. "Why don't we try another theater?" He looked at Lance and Pietro. "Guys. They're out cold." Sure enough Lance and Pietro were snoring away.

"I think we just discovered the cure for insomnia," Todd said. "Reminds me of the time we rented that film 'Naked Lunch'. Talk about false advertising."

"Better wake 'em up and get outta here," Fred sighed. "Hey guys! Guys! Wake up!"

"Aw come on Kitty," Lance muttered as Fred shook him. "Can't we look at curtains some other time? I need to go grocery shopping."

"Lance will you wake up!" Fred shook him awake. "Get out of your Kitty daze! This movie's a bust! We're heading off to another theater."

"Yo Speedy!" Todd shook Pietro. No luck. "He ain't moving yo."

"I'll get him," Lance took his coke and threw it on Pietro.

Needless to say Pietro wasn't too thrilled about this. "Let me at him!" Pietro snapped as Fred held him back. "Let me at him!"

"Come on guys let's see if there's anything else we can watch," Lance said as they walked out of the theater. They were off to the next room when they heard a loud explosion.

"Um guys," Todd looked pale. "I dunno about this, correct me if I'm wrong but there aren't any explosions in 'Pride and Prejudice' are there?"

"No," Pietro looked over at the noise. "You think one of us should check it out?"

"Do it Pietro," Lance said. "You're the fastest."

Pietro did so. As soon as he went in several people ran out screaming. "Hey guys," Pietro zipped back. "I just found out the real reason why Tabitha went into the other theater. Turns out Blue Boy and his girlfriend were in there. Notice I said 'were' as in past tense."

"Oh great," Todd grumbled. "That means the freak teleported out and is gonna bring the Geek Squad running. I really don't feel like rumbling with them tonight. Can we get outta here?"

"Yeah I'm with you," Tabitha walked through the door. "I got my evening's entertainment. Besides, it's getting kinda smoky in there. I think I set the screen on fire or something."

"Okay time to go! You know just once I'd like to go to a theater and see an entire movie to the end," Lance groaned.