The Cheshire Puppet
All right, let me say first that this is a one-shot ABSOLUTLEY…I mean you know unless everyone likes it…then I'll do more. Either way it's up to you isn't it?
Crazy today, the Helpless Romantic
Alice had always enjoyed venturing out into the woods by her home, but she had never done so at night. Now every branch, every bush, every breeze through the trees offered a new experience. She was not scared, oh no not Alice, for she knew way around the woods…or so she thought. As the minutes progressed of her moving slowly through the dark forest, it was not long till she came to a spot that was totally new. Rather than the normal leafy trees that grew high and straight, the trees here were a dark shade of purple and some red, and they grew in twisting and spiraling motions. Neon colored bushes grew berries of indescribable shape. The usual barley seeable path through the woods, which should only have been treaded upon grass, was replaced by a winding trail of cobblestone where no stone was the same.
Alice walked this twisting trail that seemed to take her farther and farther from the normal forest, till the path diverged in two, where it would have hit a horribly mangled black tree. Alice stood there at the fork wondering which path to take. Each looked equally odd and seemed to go to no place she recognized. Suddenly she heard an odd noise. She was used to the sound of wild Pokemon. Growls, hoots, buzzes, howls, screeches, singing, grunting, calling, all familiar to her, but never had she heard a sound like this before. It took a while for her to realize what it was. It was the sound of laughter, mixed with the sound of a zipper going up and down.
She looked up at the twisted black tree and as she did so, from out of the thin night air, a zipper appeared. Its golden rims curved as it zipped closed, zzzzzp, forming an arc. As Alice continued watching, two red eyes appeared above the zipper, one after the other, making a sinister smile. Finally a gray, cloth form appeared with the smile, the full form of a Banette.
It laid on one of the branches of the tree, arms supporting the back of its head, and giggled as it looked at Alice. After a few moments of shock, Alice spoke to it.
"Banette," she began timidly, not knowing how to address a demented puppet, "would you please tell me which way I ought to go?"
"That would depend a great deal on where you want to end up, my dear." The Banette replied smiling.
"I don't much care where-" Alice began.
"Well then, my dear, it doesn't really matter which way you go." The Pokemon replied closing its eyes and touching where its nose would have been.
"—so long as it's somewhere." Alice finished.
"Oh, you're sure to do that, my dear." The Banette replied, now standing on its head (literally, its head was separated from the rest of its body). "If only you walk, long enough."
"Please, just tell me which way leads to where." Alice said with minor annoyance.
The Banette returned its head to the proper place and smiled more. "Very well my dear." It said. "To the right lives the Mad Haunter," he said gesturing to the right.
"Mad?" Alice questioned.
"Quite." The Marionette Pokemon replied. "To the left is the March Sableye." now pointing to the left.
"Well I suppose I'll go left then." Alice said making toward the path.
"Of course," the Banette interrupted without looking at her, "he's mad too."
"But I don't want to go among mad Pokemon!" Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that." The Banette explained tilting his head. "We're all mad here. I'm mad, and you are too my dear."
"How do you know you're mad?" Alice asked.
"Years of practice." The Banette laughed.
"And how do you know I'm mad?" Alice asked again.
"You must be, my dear, or you wouldn't have come here." As the Banette spoke, his gray body began to fade into the darkness. Soon, all that remained were his two red eyes and zipper smile.
It laughed, truly madly, and the eyes flew past poor Alice, creating a gust of air that blew by her. The smile however, stayed for a few moments, and continued to laugh and zip back and forth before it too faded away. Poor Alice was left alone in the woods, the Cheshire Puppet's laughter echoing after it.
We're All Mad Here
