Author's note: all the usual disclaimers apply.
This is intended as a bit of playful fun. It has been adapted from something I wrote months ago not intending to share when I had to miss a trip to see a play with my favourite actor I have followed for twenty-five years. When I found it on the weekend an idea struck...Any passing resemblance / polarity to people we know, fictional and real, is purely intentional...oh and Leonie - no mention of the H word.
The rain dampened more than Barbara Havers' spirits. It was a typically drizzly London night as she hurried along the West End footpath dodging the puddles that gathered around the metal utility covers and joins in the concrete. Rainbows of melting neon refracted around her scurrying feet as she pushed east against walls of trench costs and umbrellas heading back towards Charing Cross.
She was later than she had hoped but she had been trapped in the pub by her boss, Tommy Lynley, who had been in an effusive mood as they celebrated the successful end of another tricky case. She knew her DI was lonely and she disliked leaving him when he was drinking but she had waited weeks for this chance. She had followed Matthew Walker's career for nearly twenty years when he had played a dashing, enigmatic soldier on a serialised First World War drama. He was not the star but he had fascinated Barbara with his melodious, deep voice and expressive brown eyes that had perfectly captured the complex, nuanced reactions of a soldier at war. He had gone on to star as brilliant surgeon Dr Teddy Leyland in a hospital drama with Elizabeth Large who played his long-suffering theatre nurse Brittany Hebersham. Barbara had watched all episodes so many times she could almost recite the lines by heart. In the series the tension between them had been almost unbearable but the writers had never let them even kiss. Now both actors were reunited in a short-run play based on the series and the reviews promised that finally that issue would be resolved. She had a ticket for tomorrow night but she hoped that she might still make it to the stage door in time to see them leave.
Her excitement built as she rounded the corner but her heart fell when she saw the crush by the door. The crowd was fifteen deep and some men had hoisted their girlfriends onto their shoulders. Most of the crowd were middle-aged women like herself and she saw the same hopeful desperation in their faces as they waited. Barbara stood in the rain for twenty minutes. Some of the crowd drifted away but when the actors appeared the ranks closed tighter than a Roman cohort. Barbara knew she had no chance to see Matthew so she left, mildly dejected, dripping wet yet glad she had tried.
Lynley watched his sergeant from across the road. He was standing as nonchalantly as possible in the doorway he had ducked into when Barbara had stopped. Passersby would assume that with his coat collar turned up and his trouser legs soaked through that he was sheltering from the rain. In reality he was not sure what he was doing. When she left the pub with mysterious answers to where she was going he had, on impulse, decided to follow her. He had assumed perhaps there was a man who had distracted her all evening and he was jealous. He had been relieved to discover what she was doing yet it felt invasive watching her. Despite his manners and guilt he was unable to draw away. He followed behind as she walked to Charing Cross tube station and disappeared inside. He hailed a cab and went home wrestling a maelstrom of emotions.
He poured a whiskey and stood by his fire trying to dry off. Now that he knew she was waiting at a stage door for an aging TV star he felt slightly sorry for her. She had looked lonely, and slightly pathetic, standing in the rain for a glimpse of a man she did not know. He was no better; standing in a doorway watching her. Many times lately he had wanted to ask her out but he talked himself out of it. Barbara would never want to date him. She hated his social standing as Lord Asherton, Eighth Earl. She hated everything about his upbringing from his education at Eton and Oxford through to Howenstowe, his ancestral pile in Cornwall. He was simply not her type. They could be friends, good friends, but nothing more. He sighed, drained his glass and went for a shower.
As Barbara sat sipping her tea and warming her toes by the radiator she knew that her interest in Walker was in reality no different to that of the many other women who had jostled for position in the crowd. Some of them of course would be dazzled by his good looks and charm. Despite his youthful beauty having faded into a well-worn, lived-in face he was still incredibly sexy in an indefinable way. It was the eyes and the smile she concluded. He could be forgiven for anything when he smiled; a bit like Lynley really. Others would look beyond the surface to see a genuinely nice man. In all his interviews Walker was forthright and open and proved to be thoroughly delightful person, the type everyone wanted as their brother or friend. Unlike many who probably would like to sleep with him if the opportunity arose Barbara did not. Even the hint of it would ruin his appeal. Rare among his contemporaries he had been faithful to his wife and he openly spoke of his love for her and their two sons. Barbara admired that. His family values were a large part of his attraction.
The next morning Tommy noticed that she was dressed in her best suit. "Are you in court today?"
"No, I have something on after work."
"I see." Tommy suspected she was going to the theatre but he could hardly acknowledge that without admitting he had followed her. He was no fool. He was not going to play that ugly scene out in the office.
All day she seemed anxious and distracted. Tommy had assumed that she would go alone but as the day wore on he wondered if she might be meeting someone. An unpleasant knot of envy grew in his stomach and when she left he again followed her. He was horrified that he had stooped to tailing her but he needed to know if he had a rival, at least one that was obtainable. Tonight's weather was more tolerable and Barbara sauntered happily past shops and paused to gaze in the windows of others. Lynley was trying hard not to look suspicious but he knew to a trained eye he looked like a stalker who had sinister intentions. At the theatre she paused and looked around. For one horrible moment he thought she would see him but he ducked in time. When he looked up again she had her ticket clenched tightly in her fist as she headed up the stairs. Tommy glanced at his watch. It was seven thirty and the show would finish around ten. He debated his options then walked down the street to find a pub.
Barbara had saved hard to afford one of the best seats in the third row. It was a splurge for her but one that had been worth it. She was only a few feet from the stage and could see the action clearly. The details of their faces had surprised her. Large was far more beautiful than she had ever appeared on the series and Barbara could see tiny beads of sweat breaking through their makeup. It was almost as if she were part of the action. The old chemistry between the stars was there as if no time had passed since the series. In the scene where they finally admitted their love after an exhausting life-saving surgery on a small boy, the audience was silent. Everyone held their breath as they watched them kiss then burst into applause yelling 'encore, encore'. Barbara sat silently watching them. She was not concentrating on the play but thinking of her boss. Tommy was a lot like Leyland, a slightly flawed genius who was generous, kind and loyal. She smiled; her boss was actually rather hot too. She would not mind if one day he kissed her after a grueling case. She blushed and dismissed the thought as she stood and clapped and cheered the actors. "Woo hoo! Yay!"
Tommy knew Barbara would go to the stage door. As people streamed from the theatre he was already standing in his doorway. He spotted Barbara. She had a felt marker in one hand and her programme in the other and managed to secure a position near the front of the crowd. It was nearly thirty minutes before the door swung open and the actors emerged. Tommy had Googled the play and the actors last night. He knew the storyline and he had heard Barbara mention the show once or twice. He could not really understand why it captivated her but he imagined lonely nights in front of the television had a lot to do with it. He was lonely too but he had music and opera and literature to sustain him.
When Walker and Large came out to the crowd Barbara surged forward with everyone else. The actors waved and smiled. "My goodness there are a lot of you. Where do we start?" he said.
Walker turned away from where Barbara was standing while Large came over towards her. Barbara lost sight of Walker but after patiently waiting had the chance to quickly say hello to the actress as she signed anything shoved towards her. Elizabeth thanked her for coming and gave her a warm and genuine smile. Barbara was pleased but as the crowd thinned she looked for Walker. Just when she had elbowed her way near him the door opened and the actors were called inside. They put arms around each other and smiled then waved and disappeared. The crowd dispersed quickly leaving Barbara and a few others staring emptily at the door.
Tommy wanted to race across the road and hug her. He had seen her shoulders slump and could almost feel her disappointment. He knew his sergeant well though and as expected she pulled herself up and tucked away the programme and any regret under her coat and walked away.
He followed discreetly as she trudged down Charing Cross Road. Crowds were gathered in Trafalgar Square and instead of turning to the station she sat on the steps and watched the people bustle by. Tommy found a perch on the steps of St Martins from where he could observe her. She seemed fascinated by a small crowd of demonstrators on the terrace of the National Gallery being watched over by four mounted police. Tourists were chatting to the police and posing for photos with the horses whose manes were neatly braided.
Barbara was intrigued by the night. Everywhere people moved on ancient tracks seared into the subconscious and known only to the individual. Barbara imagined the criss-crossed patterns of movement in her head. As a policewoman she often saw the underbelly of the city; the back alleys where unfortunates were slashed with knives for a few pounds or prostitutes and rent boys were beaten to death by those with power over their lives. Tonight she was watching the normal people. Lovers strolled arm-in-arm by the fountains and nervous boys were waiting for the opportunity to kiss their girl as they gazed up at Nelson. Theatre patrons in suits and tailored dresses flowed from the Westend into swanky restaurants and hotels. Many more headed for the station to return to their humdrum suburban lives. All the paths were intersecting and diverging; touching each other only briefly but creating a totality that was London.
Tommy followed her gaze and began to scrutinise what she was seeing. The city was heaving as people moved around it in a rhythm that only made sense when you were part of it. He and Barbara were outsiders; interlopers looking for the worst potential in people rather than appreciating the small joys of the moment. Tommy saw addicts and thieves; muggers and rapists; people with vacant stares and lost hope. It was depressing and he was encroaching on their lives just as he was intruding on Barbara's. He groaned, took once last glance at her then walked down to The Strand and hailed a cab.
Barbara had been thinking about Tommy and what he would make of the crowd. She toyed with the idea of walking to Belgravia and knocking on his door but what would she say? 'Sorry just passing and thought I'd drop in to say I love you?' She smiled but snorted derisively. It was then that she looked up and saw him, standing by the fence of the church watching her. Her heart beat faster as she quickly looked towards Nelson's Column. No! It can't be. When she turned back the man was gone.
Two days later Tommy nervously called Barbara into his office. "Barbara I have a favour to ask."
"Yeah?" She was munching on an apple and he wondered if it was bad timing.
"Judith is hosting a dinner for and old friend tomorrow night. I was wondering if you would accompany me."
"Why?"
He had anticipated rejection and argument but not that question. "Because I would like you to come with me."
"Why can't you ask someone more suitable? Someone from your lot."
"I'm not ready for that," he lied uncomfortably, "I don't want people thinking I'm on the market and raising expectations. Then all the society desperates will appear from the woodwork with invitations I am not ready for." That was true but he could not tell her the real reason was that he had begun to realise that he falling in love with her.
"Where?"
"At her apartment. She is in town for the week."
"I'm not sure Sir," she said guiltily, "I'd probably use the wrong fork or something and embarrass you both. Why don't you take Constable Green? She went to Wycombe and is always staring at you."
"I don't like her. I want to take you. I guarantee you will find it worthwhile."
Barbara frowned at him. Worthwhile? Surely he's not! "I don't quite know what you mean by that but..."
Tommy realised the implication and put up his hand. "Sorry! I meant that I guarantee you will enjoy the evening. Her guests are fun I believe and Judith wants you there."
Barbara was highly suspicious but also curious. She liked his sister and could not imagine they were up to anything sinister. It would be good for her reputation too to have Lynley as a date. A date! No, I'm just his safe bet; his friend. "What am I supposed to wear?"
Tommy smiled broadly which made Barbara even more wary. "Your black suit would be perfect. I'll pick you up at seven."
"Just remember Sir, you asked me so it's your fault if this goes pear shaped."
Tommy arrived just before seven and straightened his jacket and tie before he knocked on her door. She was wearing her suit but with a softer, more flowing cream blouse that he had never seen before. "Good evening Barbara, you look lovely tonight," he said as he smiled and extended his arm.
She locked her door and warily accepted his gesture as she allowed him to guide her to his car. This was already feeling awkward. It felt more like a date than her helping out her friend. She tried to dismiss the idea but wondered if perhaps the evening might end in a goodnight kiss. She felt her face redden.
Tommy looked over and saw her smiling and blushing. He hoped this was not going to backfire on him.
