.HackLUNCH

Very little comic violence…and maybe gross food

I don't own dot hack sign, and I don't want it either! MWAHAHAHA! This is a completely random idea that I randomly chose the dothacksign characters for! Please R&R!

One day Sora, Bear, Mimiru, Tsucasa, and BT were hanging out for lunch. Bear was having a penut butter and ketchup sandwich.

Mimiru-Ewwww you eat that?????

Bear-I really like ketchup, I'll eat anything with ketchup on it

Sora has an evil grin on his face-Anything?????

Bear- oh yeah, anything

Sora grabs a bottle of ketchup. Tsucasa is staring into space and doesn't notice it when Sora squirts ketchup all over him.

Tsucasa looks at himself- Ah! I'm bleeding!

Before Tsucasa knows whats going on, Bear eats him

Bear licks his fingers- Tsucasa ala ketchup…very tasty

Sora has a really evil grin on his face now. He advances on BT

BT- Oh no, don't you come near me with that

Sora squirts ketchup all over BT and Bear eats her too

Sora- Do you want revenge on Mimiru for saying your sandwich was gross?

Bear-not really

Sora pauses for a second- well too bad!

He squirts ketchup in Mimiru's direction and she gets covered in it. Bear starts moving towards her.

Mimiru- Bear! I didn't mean that! Don't eat me!

Bear- Ooooo, ketchup!

Bear eats Mimiru. He lets out a burp and pats his stomach- I think I'm full now

Sora- Okay! Now that I've had my fun, I know how to defeat you!

Sora squirts ketchup all over Bear. Bear calmly licks the ketchup off himself

Sora- how did you resist eating stuff with ketchup on it?!

Bear- why would I eat myself?

Sora- hmm, true

All of a sudden Elk pops up and squirts ketchup all over Sora

Once Bear was done eating Sora he goes and eats Elk- I never said there had to be ketchup on anything to eat it

The end! Hooray for the sucky ending! You can have humor without swearing!

Bear's advice- Never Eat At McDonalds, it gave me food poisoning, like, three times!