Not Meant To Be

12

Aideena and Ryuuto would be in their early 20's in this.

Aideena gets a surprise, one of them is fairly good and the other brings everything crashing around her.

Putting the kettle on she made her way to the living room, feeling rather restless as she had just had her scan of the babies that she was carrying. She had to go alone, given that Ryuuto was away for work and wouldn't be home now for another week or two.

He wasn't aware that she was carrying twins and it was a bit of a surprise to her as well, even though she was a twin and the aunts were also twins.

Tsubasa had offered to go with her, as had Kenta and Madoka, but she didn't want anyone there apart from Ryuuto and if he wasn't there then she could go alone. It didn't bother her, or at least she didn't think it would since it was just a scan; but she was wrong, she needed to have someone with her.

She had looked at the screen and the doctor had pointed out the two little blobs, she felt her heart tug a bit and wished that Ryuuto was there, knowing how excited he would be with the news.

She got her tea made and sat back down on the sofa, deciding to just called Ryuuto even though it was early over there she just didn't want to wait any more and knew he would be happy with the news too. She took a deep breath, gathering the courage to tell him on the phone, full of trepidation at the thought of telling him that although they were having not one baby but twins instead. She was certain that it was easier to tell him that it was pregnant than it was with this.

She listened to the ringing, hoping that Ryuuto would just ignore it and try and sleep again, she just wanted this over with.

"Mh… Aideena… It's early," Ryuuto said with a yawn and she smiled, picturing his tousled hair and half closed eyes.

"I know Ryuuto, but I have something to tell you,"

"What?" He opened his eyes fully and sat straight up on the bed; "What happened?" he asked her, all traces of sleep gone.

"We're… I'm… It's twins," She said quietly and he frowned.

"I didn't get that, this line must be funny…"

"I'm pregnant with twins," She said more clearly, though her voice was still shaking, having waited for this moment to actually tell someone the news.

"Twins?" He repeated dumbly and realised something else; "Like you and Ronan,"

"The doctor says it's too early to tell whether they are boys or girls yet," She curled up on the sofa, glad to hear his voice again and knowing that it was the hormones that were making him more than normal, but she had to tell him this one thing as well; "Ryuuto I'm… I'm scared,"

"Huh? Aideena I'll be home in a few days," He told her softly, trying to sooth her.

"I know but... I'm still scared," She admitted and sighed; "I just wanted to tell you first… I don't know if I can cope with two babies,"

"The aunts…" Ryuuto began to point out and she smiled.

"There were two of them,"

"I'll be…"

"You need to work,"

"I can get a proper job," He said firmly.

"You love what you do; I don't want you to take a job that we both know you will hate."

"I love you," He told her forcefully, trying to get his point across and make her understand; "It's for our family, Ryuuga did the same thing for…"

Ryuuga used to go off and train for a few days at a time without any notice. Now he doesn't. She thought to herself, seeing the big difference in the two brothers; "We can talk more when you come back home,"

"Right," He said, knowing that the conversation was cover; "Love you," He told her and heard her soft reply back, knowing that she was blushing in her reply too and hung up.

She smiled hoping that everything would go well, hoping that she would not be like her mother and that she would do better…

XXX

A month later though she was back in the hospital as Ryuuto was once again away on a business trip and Tsubasa was the one who took her in to see the doctor to get seen to. She didn't believe there was a problem, but she was in discomfort and as Tsubasa was there for tea he didn't want to take any chances.

As she had another scan she tried to focus on breathing, not looking at anyone even trying to ignore the doctor's words that still came to her.

"I'm sorry; you appear to have had a miscarriage…"

She began to move, wanting off the table, wanting to go somewhere and just… Scream out her heartache and disappointment when she felt Tsubasa's hands on her shoulders pushing her back and shaking his head at her.

"I want to…" She began to growl out.

"You've only lost one of them, the other is still…" Tsubasa began to repeat what the doctor had tried to tell her but she had been so focused on getting out of the room she hadn't paid any attention.

"I… What?" She looked at the two of them; lying back down at the doctor showed her that one twin was still alive.

She starred at the little shape, unable to believe that she was carrying two babies, twins and now? Now she only had one.

Is this to atone for my mother's sins? She wondered to herself as Tsubasa took her home and made sure she was all right. The thoughts kept on coming, even though the Eagle blader tried to distract her.

"Tsubasa, thanks for…" She began to say and trailed off, feeling the tears fall and she began to cry, her shoulder shook as everything that had happened throughout the day hit her.

She had been pregnant with twins the day before and now there was only one. She had never really paid much attention to her Catholic upbringing but she did wonder if she was paying for the sins of her mother, if they were being passed down to her and she was cursed to deal with them.

Tsubasa pulled her into a hug, gently rubbing her back but saying nothing, letting her get it out of her system until she was softly hiccupping.

"It's okay,"

She just nodded and wiped her eyes from the remaining tears that continued to slowly drop; "It's just…" She trailed off.

"Just?"

"I don't think I can do this…" She admitted, feeling guilty at her words, knowing that she still had one baby in her belly, but another side of her just wished that it had been both of them, instead she had to live with the guilt that one baby died because of something that she did or something…

"How? You might have lost one baby but you still have one," He tried to make her see the positive side but she shook her head; "Aideena?"

"It's just… If they had both died I could grieve for them and then possibly move on… But one is still alive," She touched her belly which was showing a slight bump now; "I know it's disgusting that I think that way but…" she felt the tears begin to rise up and fall; "I just wish he was here,"

"He'll be back in a few days…" Tsubasa told her, rubbing her back again; "I can call him and get him to come back sooner?"

She said nothing, wanting Ryuuto to come home and just have him hold her and another part of her just wanted him to stay where he was.

"Come on, the doctor said you should take this," He said, deciding that when she fell asleep he would call Ryuuto and get him home; Just can't say anything about why.

Aideena said nothing, just took the medicine that he gave her and made her way to bed, falling asleep instantly and he frowned, wondering if she would be all right with some time and Ryuuto being back home.

One way to find out I guess. He thought to himself as he called up Ryuuto to get him back home, to have him held Aideena through this when the rest of them were out of their depth.