Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who, or Torchwood

Not Again

He was a changed man these days.

It had been thousands and thousands of years since he'd gone by the name 'Jack Harkness', and even more years since someone could have possibly recognised him as such.

He wasn't as flirtatious these days, that was for sure. And it had definitely been a while since someone had called him 'cheesy' as Mickey Smith had all those years ago. As the face (and yes he'd heard all the jokes before) of a major intergalactic company, he was more likely to be described as 'enigmatic' nowadays.

But there were some things that never changed.

When he'd heard the news that long ago, his eyes had almost popped out of his skull, and he'd sworn that it would never happen again.

'You take the pill and flush it away, it enters the water cycle, feminizes the fish. It goes all the way up into the sky and then falls all the way back down onto me. Contraceptives in the rain. I love this planet. Still, at least I won't get pregnant... never doing that again.'

So when one of his servants came with the results from the doctor. One thought went through the Face of Boe's mind. Of course, he didn't voice it at first, he was far too enigmatic for that. As a front he merely murmured unintelligibly and closed his eyes.

But unbeknownst to the leaving servant or anyone else, Captain Jack Harkness was still very much there in his new persona. And had the servant waited, he would have heard something he would never have forgotten.

The Face of Boe had opened his mouth and said emphatically, "Aww, crap... Not again!"

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A/N: yeah... I have no excuse for this other than I'm intermittently revising for an exam, and revision combined with procrastination does strange things to my brain... Please review!