Title: Perfectly Normal, But Not Quite Safe
Summary: A happening like Oz has never seen…
Rating: T
Archive: Yes.
Disclaimer: I own the clever plot devices, Benzir and whoever else I bring in later.
Author's Note: I got this idea from The Pixess and Lost Ozian. I am no where near that funny, but I am really bored. The cure? Right about CENSORED, and it's always funny. I do enjoy crack fics (not crack; that is quite disgusting; I also have a fear of things flying at my nose). As a prerequisite to reading this I suggest that you go watch Reefer Madness the movie musical on youtube. Alan Cumming is a god among men (he has his own fragrance which will make an appearance sometime). Just go watch it and laugh. I love it. Some of it will be in this. You have been warned.
I really hope this is funny to other people and not just me. Ozian and Pixess, I bow to you.
Chapter One: 4:20am
The screams, shrill and painful, began at 20 past 4 in the morning. Windows open and facing the courtyard, the room devoured the sounds until they overwhelmed the sleeping prince. One deep breath before the next scream, and he shot out of bed.
"What in Oz is that?"
Fiyero Tiggular, a stunning spectacle in his loose pants and lack of shirt, threw his head out the window. With his roommate absent, but wandering the courtyard below in the fog, he felt no need to sport additional clothing. The fan girls agreed.
"Benzir, what are you doing?"
"I heard some screams and I thought I'd investigate."
Had movies and clever plot devices reached Oz yet, Benzir would have realized how idiotic that sounded. However, movies and clever plot devices had not reached Oz yet, and Benzir thought that it was perfectly safe…and by safe I mean normal; perfectly normal.
"That's sounds perfectly normal. I'll come help you."
Had movies and clever plot devices reached Oz yet, Fiyero still would not have realized how idiotic that sounds. Fiyero was in fact, quite dim at 20 past 4 in the morning without coffee.
"No, it's okay. I'll come up." The footsteps echoed in the fog until Fiyero heard a very unmanly scream rise up form the ground. Benzir ran to wall of the dormitory desperately scrambling up until the petite form of ShenShen threw him back to the ground. Three screams; then silence.
"Luriline, Benzir, she has a boy friend."
…To Be Continued…
