Once upon a pond

There was a prince.

"PRINCE FROG!"

They called him.

"HAIL PRINCE FROG!"

Too late they realized their mistake,

With no time left to hide in the lake…

"MY NAME'S HERBERT!" Froggy said.

A migraine coming to his head…

His advisors stood in shocked silence.

His mother, though, more prone to violence

She grabbed him by a puny ear

(Do frogs have ears, you ask? --- Yes they do, but we can't see them)

And yelled at Herb "LET'S GO SON Dear!"

And when at home there was heard a loud, loooong clatter,

ALL advisors knew what was the matter…

"AHHH!"

"OOOO!"

"EEEEEEYOWCH!"

"Jeez mom…

Stop being a GROUCH!"

"You know what KID, YOU need to get

MARRIED!"

( This issue has already come up in previous fights… read on to find out more)

Herb's mother, when mad, was really scary…

But Herb, whose mind, on the issue, was VERY firm

Yelled right back, "YA! WELL, YOU NEED A PERM!"

"YOU KNOW WHAT, SMART GUY, YOU NEED A WIFE!

THEN, MAYBE MY LIFE WOULD BE DEVOID OF STRIFE!

SOMEONE MUST TAKE YOU OFF MY HANDS…

THEN MY LIFE WOULD END RULING THESE LANDS!

(It is implied that she means she would rather die ruling her kingdom than die trying to deal with Herbert…)

She then commenced to stomp down the hall

Scattering advisors, one and all

"Mirror, Mirror,

On the wall,

What princesses are available for marriage this fall!"

Hounding the Mirror, whose answer was slow

At the mirror, even taking a blow

Made the mirror scared and upset

So, he hurried to start reading his answer set…

"The girls I've found are only three…

I'll hurry through this, so you won't hurt me...

"Princesses Freya, Froginda, and Princess Frogette,

Have not been proposed to as of YET.

Pick a princess of the three,

And a quest shall ensue, for marrying one to thee."

Herb looked for a second, and made his choice

But before him, a much louder voice

Yelled, "Go! Go! Go! Get moving Herb!"

(The louder voice being Herb's mother, the queen)

And with that Herbert, quite literally, was kicked to the curb

So…

Kicked out of the house, alone without friends,

Prince Herbert took out the keys to the Mercedes Benz

But at the royal garage, taking it out was a whole other matter…

There was a guard in the 'Benz and his name was Bill Batter

Known for his strength with a club and a bat

If he took a swing, he'd hit more than your hat

So, with no other choice and nothing to drive

Herb took off down the road; thanking God he was still alive