SO, Here you go Starr!

Friend of mine and I decided to have Bleach Fic Challenge. We both choose a character, a song, and a genre the other could use to write with. Not really sure what'll decide the winner. (If your interested, go read her's too, Her Handle is SecretStarr) Anyways, I got stuck with Western as a Genre, Yumichika as the main character, and the song is Wow I Can Get Sexual Too by Say Anything. (look it up, you'll see just how hard it is to write a western with that song.)

They were intended to be one shots, but because I have limited access to a computer for the time being, It's gonna be a one shot broke up into two chapters. The juicier bit will be in the second half!

Well, here's what I came up with.

Oh Yeah, time for a fantastic disclaimer.

I don't own Bleach (Disclaimer)


The town was choked with sand. It was kicked and swished along by a fierce wind coming in from the east. The citizens looked on through windows, hoping the shallow pane of glass would be enough to keep the Chaos outside at bay. Many of them were praying that the brawl of the two men would just end, so they would be absolved of the worry.

One of the men spoke, "Bunch of no good cowards, neither of us are after them, yet their still too chicken shit to even stand and watch a great duel…bahahahaha."

The other man, stood across from him, just steps away, "Perhaps it's not the duel their afraid of, but your ugly face?"

"Shut up you rat bastard, don't think I've forgotten the reason were out here!" He placed his hand on a pistol strapped to his waist.

The other man followed suit, resting his right hand down on his own pistol, "I'm sorry, but she's far too beautiful for me to let you have her…"

"Draw!"

Three days Earlier…

The night was bright, illuminated by the moon as three men, all drunk, all obnoxious, made their way down an alley, barking about how big their bite was, "Did you see the look on that guys face when I stood up?"

Another replied,"Yeah, What an idiot, he was about to piss his pants, hahahaha!" They all began to laugh boisterously, when suddenly they heard a shout, causing them all to stop and pay attention. "What did you say? I'll kill you, you bastard!" Another voice rang down the alley as it replied, "I only spoke what was true, that you are unbelievably hideous." All that followed was the sound of a gunshot, the three men seemed shocked and ran down to the end of the alley to see for themselves what had happened.

As they rounded the corner, they were surprised at what they found. A crowd of people stood in awe as one man had a gun drawn, smoke rising from it, and another man lay dead on the ground with a gun in his hand, a single bullet through his heart. Murmurs from the crowd had begun to say things such as "The other man did draw first, so he was in the right."

As the crowd looked on, the man who was still alive spun his revolver and placed it back in it's holster, then he turned towards the alley the three drunks stood in and began to approach them. As they watched his approach, one of them had a startling revelation, "Look guys, his hat!" Another of the men replied, "Your right, colorful feathers…that's…that's…" The last of the three finished his sentence, " Yumichika Ayasegawa! He's got a 5,000 dollar price on his head!"

"What 5,000!" The once cocky boasters were now shaking with fear as they watched the man approach them. As he came upon them, he stopped in front of one of the men, sending a jolt of paralysis down the man's spine, he spoke, "You…" The man managed a forced reply, "Yes sir!" Yumichika grinned, "Your quite the pretty boy like myself, you deserve to live a very long time." As he finished, he walked on past them, disappearing from sight in the depths of the alleyway.

The three men all watched as he left, they're fright had shifted into a bit of surprise as they all spoke in unison, "What the hell was that?"

The Following Day...

The night had been unseasonably cold, cold enough to freeze a man if he was unprepared for such harsh conditions. The cold began to wane as the sun started to bring a new day to fruition, it's light revealed a deep canyon which was host to a man sleeping soundly on the cold ground. It all seemed quite peaceful until the loud sound of horses came echoing down the canyon walls.

It roused the man, he groggily spoke to himself out loud, "What the hell is that…," he stood before he continued, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, "Wait, is that, YES, it sounds like a caravan, I can hitch a ride!"

A family of five were headed west by means of a caravan, everyone but the father was sawing logs in the back. The man had wrapped himself up in a couple wool blankets to cut the chill of the morning. He had directed the horses down a road trampled out by previous pioneers, it lead down into a canyon, and moreover, it lead to a huge surprise. There was a man, all alone, no horse, no equipment, standing next to the remains of a tiny campfire, waving his arms rapidly trying to hail him down. As he approached the man, he brought the horses to a stop, "Damn son, what the hell are doing all the way out here like this?"

The man managed a reply through chattering teeth, "L-L-L-ong story short, I L-L-Lost my horse and had to walk, can I hitch a ride?" The man just grinned, "Hop on up!"

"Thanks!" He wasted no time, he was on the caravan and sat down next to the man. "Here," the older man unwrapped one of the blankets he was wearing and handed it to his new passenger. He took the blanket without hesitation and wrapped it around himself, "Thank you very much sir!" The older man gave a quick reply as he gave the reins a whip, provoking the horses to move again, "No problem, so what's your name son?"

The caravan had regained full speed as the younger man replied, "It's Yumichika, and you?

"Dan, it's nice to meet you…so where you from, where you headed, what do you do?"

Yumichika didn't really give it much though as he just started talking away, "Where I'm from, was an ugly place, maggots pray upon the living dead, filthy."Dan laughed at the statement as Yumichika carried on, "I'm really not headed to any particular place, next town will be fine…gotta replace the horse I lost, and I can't afford another night out here to die in this dreadful cold." Dan spoke up, "Speaking of which, how the hell did that happen?"

"Well, I kind of got chased out of the last town I was in…no time to gather my things"

Dan gave him a look of inquisition, "Why'd you get chased out?"

Yumichika grinned, "Might have something to do with the bounty on my head."

Dan questioned, "Bounty?"

"Yes sir, but I've never killed an innocent man in my life," Yumichika's reply was sincere.

"Fair enough for me," Dan replied as he gave the horses another whip. Both men grew silent as the caravan sped on through the frontier.

A few hours later…

The sun had only been up for a short time, Dan's family still slept in the back of the caravan. For nearly the entire ride, Yumichika had interacted quite lively with Dan, they spent most of the ride chatting each other up. That was until they came upon a town, Yumichika looked up to read a big sign announcing the name of the town, it read Amber. "Hey old man," Yumichika inquisitioned, "This town, Amber, it's a trading town right?" Dan had to think for a minute, "Yes, I believe it is."

"Right, then I'll get off here."

Dan pulled the reins and brought the horses to a stop, "Alright then."

Yumichika unwrapped the blanket he had borrowed and placed it down in the seat, then proceeded to climb down from the caravan, "Thanks again old man, you take good care of that family of yours."

"I will, good luck in your hunt for all things beautiful!" Dan got the horses moving again and rode on out of sight, leaving Yumichika standing alone in the street. He thought to himself, "What a dusty place, filthy, I'm gonna have to wash my clothes twice…guess I best find someplace I can stay for the time being… " He bagan walking through the mostly empty streets, and as he did, he took in his surroundings. It was a fairly large town, he expected it would be bustling with life by the time noon rolled around. It had more tall buildings than any town he'd been to in the last couple of years. "Ha, maybe I'll find some decent accommodations here, I'm sick of all this dust," and with that he went off in search of an inn.

On the other side of town…

Two men sat talking in a what seemed to be a bar when a voice called to them, "You guys thirsty?" One of the two men gave a quick reply, "You know it, bring us something hard bartender!" The bartender gave a slight chuckle from behind the bar as he spoke, "Ha, how many times do I have to tell you guys, this is not some common bar, you will just have to take something without alcohol with your breakfast." The man who had requested the liquor whined, "Come on Kisuke….just one?"

The man now revealed to be known as Kisuke approached to table where the two men sat, "No way Shunsui, just shut up and take the coffee." Shunsui whined, taking the coffee in his hand as he did, "Aww man, whatever." Kisuke motioned to hand a coffee mug over to the other man, "Here you are Joshiro."

"Thanks Kisuke."

"Sure," and with that, Kisuke began to walk back towards the bar, but before he could get back to it, someone came in through the front door. He was surprised when he didn't recognize the man, usually only regulars came in this early in the morning, yet he still beckoned the man, "Morning sir, what can I do ya for?"

A few minutes prior…

Yumichika had been making his way quickly through the streets, as it was still cold and he had little protection from it. "Damn, how long till I find a some place with a beautiful room to stay in!" He glanced around, seeing nothing but a few people walking around and some tumbleweeds rolling along. Angered by the situation, he had grown impatient and began to shout even louder, "Damn it, how am I supposed to fix my clothes and take a bath if I can't find a stupid hotel!" He closed his eyes and screamed in frustration, "GAAAGGHHH!"

Just then, he jumped with surprise when someone tapped his shoulder and a beautiful voice came along with it, "Excuse me?" Yumichika quickly opened his eyes and was immediately stunned at the sight of this person, he thought to himself, "She's gorgeous!"

Before he could get any words out, she started to speak in a tone meant to mock, "If your looking for a hotel, all you have to do is turn around, you idiot." She chuckled and walked away, and as she did, Yumichika watched her long blond hair flowed in the breeze, "Thanks Miss." She just waved a hand to him without turning around and turned a corner, moving out of sight.

"I have to find out who that was; she may be the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen…" As he thought, he turned to look at the building behind him and read the giant sign on the front aloud, "Urahada's…what the hell is this place?"

He noticed how the building seemed run down, "Awful, this building is ugly…but I guess I'll have to deal with it." He motioned to open the door and proceeded to walk in. He looked up to see three men, two sat at a table and one was standing directly in front of him, but what struck him was how brilliant the inside of the place looked, "This place is so fancy, perfect for one as beautiful as myself." His thoughts were interrupted when he looked upon the man who stood in front of him. He was tall and slender, he had messy blonde hair and bore a green and white stripped bucket hat. The man lifted a hand to push his hat up a little, "Morning sir, What can I do ya for?"

Yumichika grinned wildly, "I need Information about what may be the most beautiful thing I've EVER seen."

"Well then," the man with the hat pulled out a chair, "If its information you're after, you came to the correct place…why don't you have a seat and order something?"

"I think I will."


SO what did ya think?

Remember, that's just the first part, it was more the character intro I suppose. (Second part's much longer as well)

I listened to a band Called We Were Promised Jetpacks a lot while I wrote this, Give em' a listen!

Thanks for reading!