An Interview with the Bringers of Armageddon

Hosted by Inuyoshie, who owns nothing

Inu: Hallo hallo beautiful people!

Aja: Why do you always say that?

Ulquiorra: Trash…

Inu: Shush yourself or I shall put you in a frilly pink tutu, for I am the authouress of darkness and I have the power to do so!

Aja: You also have an ego about the same size as Aizen's…

Inu: Thank you.

Aja: … which is saying something.

Aizen: *glares at Aja* Weren't you here for a reason?

Inu: Yes. We're going to talk about the characters of Bleached Armageddon!

Grimmjow: Why?

Nikky: Why not?

Inu: Precisely! So, let's hear all about… Aja!

Aja: One! I am NOT crazy.

Grimmjow: I beg to differ.

Gin: I agree. Let's ask Granz…

Szayel: Hm… I'd say-

Aja: I'm INSANE get it right or I'll beat you to death with a tea cozy!

Inu: That's right.

Aizen: Didn't you have me say she was fragile?

Aja: I am not fragile!

Inu: Aja is fragile emotionally. She's easy to mess with. But let's do things in a proper order.

Aja: Who wants to do it that way?

Inu: Just go with it. Name?

Aja: Aja.

Inu: Age?

Aja: None of your business.

Inu: It's 16.

Aja: Rawr.

Inu: What do you look like?

Aja: Ugly.

Aizen: Tall and blonde.

Nicole: And she has big boobs.

Aja: WHAT?

Chloe: It's true. Of all of us, you have the largest breasts. I have the smallest.

Dakota: Actually, I do. I have none.

Maddie: It's true. Even Sophie has more than you, and she's half your size!

Inu: … How did we get off track here?

Grimmjow: I blame the boobs. And Nicole's are bigger!

Nicole: No, Aja's are.

Grimmjow: You're just being modest-

Inu: Carrying on… nickname?

Aja: Ashi, or Ashima. Maddie likes calling me Ashi, as does Nicole. Chloe, Dakota and Sophie generally call me Aja though. Maddie and Nicole are a little closer to me than the others are.

Maddie: Mhm.

Dakota: Yes, but we're just as cool.

Inu: Indeed, my gay friend. Indeed.

Dakota: What's that supposed to mean?

Inu: Nothing, nothing at all. So Aja, what do you like to do?

Aizen: Give me headaches.

Aja: Yes… and cause mischief… and listen to classical music, and cook and crochet, and read YAOI!

Nicole: Yaay yaoi!

Maddie: Indeed!

Chloe: Yaoi ish awesome!

Dakota: I know! Isn't my life great?

Aja: Neeh, you're on bottom though. Sucks to be you.

Chloe: Literally-

Inu: Carrying on…

Gin: My my, yer all such closet perverts!

Aja: The only one of us who is a closet pervert is Maddie. Lucky you.

Maddie: *reddens* Can we move on?

Inu: Yes. Aja's pairing is with Aizen, they just don't know it.

Aja: I hate him!

Inu: But he's hot.

Aizen: *twitches* I'm standing right here!

Inu: So? I've got lotsa pairings in store for you buddy boy. Once Bleached Armageddon is over…

All (minus Ulquiorra and Grimmjow): NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ulquiorra: Trash.

Grimmjow: FINALLY! THERE'S AN END IN SIGHT!

Inu: … I'll be doing an AizenXOC.

Aizen: Again?

Inu: Yes, with you in the Soul Society, 'cuz you and Gin are hot in your captain's haori. So says I.

Aja: We're off topic again.

Inu: Sorry. So…anything else y'all wanna know?

Nicole: What horrible things are you going to do to Aja?

Inu: Well, she's going to have a skirmish with Menoly and Lola because I strongly dislike those two.

Aja: What? Damn!

Inu: How that goes will remain a secret.

Aja: Damn you!

Chloe: What about her lemon?

Inu: It will be last. I'm making Aizen work his ass off for Aja.

Aizen: *glares*

Inu: Other than that, I haven't really planned hers out yet. It's the only one I haven't planned out/ written.

Ulquiorra: It disturbs me that you actually plan these things out…

Inu: I'm a disturbing person. Deal with it.

Aizen: Why do I have to put up with you? Aren't I God?

Inu: Yes, and I'm the fanfic writer who could write you in a crack-fic and pair you with… oh, someone horrible like Mayuri-

All: *shudders*

Inu: Or… Shinji! I'm actually fond of that pairing. And you'd be on bottom!

Aizen: But I've got him hypnotized the whole time though, so wouldn't I-

Inu: He outranks you. And if all of a sudden you turn into a seme which is totally against the personality you've set up…

Aizen: *glares*

Inu: So yes. I win.

Dakota: Why don't you look again… Light.

Inu: I'M NOT LIGHT AND YOU ARE NOT IN A DEATH NOTE FANFIC!

Dakota: Awww!

Szayel: Aren't I good enough for you? *stomps off*

Dakota: Wait, no Szayel Aporro-sama… *runs off*

Aja: Ooooh, even using his proper title… daaang.

Inu: Anyway, I think we're out of time.

Aja: Awww!

Inu: To all you readers, if you want to draw Aja, feel free to! In fact, I would be incredibly happy and write a drabble of any pairing with any intensity of hotness to anyone who draws our six protagonists. Just post them on a DevieantArt account or Photobucket and alert me of their presence. On DeviantArt I am InuyoshieOokami. And… please review!

Grimmjow: Please! So you can stop the torture!