January
Sixteen and in Love

Darling! My Darkling Dove,
Weeper of sweet dreams and bygones
How you've eluded me, these many years
Leaving me with your heart, your song

Shall I toil about my daily chores
Gaily, happily, for all the world to see?
Shall I ponder into the night, that should you not return,
what will become of me?

Shall I lose myself to the vermilion haze
And bare my broken heart to all?
Or shall I wait for you, every day by the door,
Forever faithful, after all?


It was a minute to midnight, and she was staring out the window, a glass of whatever her brother had mixed up for her in her hand. Behind her, the New Year's Eve party was in full swing, though she had excuses herself from the it a long time ago.

Attleboro hadn't been this merry in a long time, but she had been determined to make this season a festive one, partly to try and bring everyone together after the clue hunt, and another more selfish reason.

That reason was currently not to be found anywhere.

So she had resigned herself with watching all the festivities from the side, occasionally speaking to someone, but otherwise observing the crowd with a small smile on her lips.

Just then, someone announced thirty seconds remaining of the old year, and she knew she had to move and join the rest of them.

Twenty seconds…

What would the new year bring for them?

They had already lost so much, the past seemingly a nightmarish constant, but somehow, their hopes and dreams remained unshattered. She had seen members of her family putting aside petty differences all night to celebrate one thing: the future, burning bright and untarnished, ready for them to make something of it.

Fifteen seconds…

What would the future bring for her?

Faith, maybe? In a better world and the united Cahills to lead it?

Perhaps it would be the strength and courage to lead the way as they embarked on this new passage of their history?

What about love? A little voice whispered in her head.

The thought was tempting, as seductive as the idea itself, but no she would not yield, not now.

10…

So she hurried past a throng on merry-makers, ready to toast to the New Year, intent on making it back to her friends for the countdown. She felt herself breeze by the crowd and was headed right towards them when...

9…

She felt a warm hand grab hers and gently tug her towards its owner. She inhaled sharply,-

8…

-And found herself pulled into a familiar body.

Well, she'd finally found him.

Or to be more accurate, he had finally found her.

She closed her eyes for a moment, inhaling the scent of spices and musk that he always seemed to smell like.

7…

She then looked up to see his amber eyes twinkling in the dim light, her own wide and unblinking as she registered the position she was in.

What are you doing? She seemed to ask through her eyes.

6…

She could hear a boisterous crowd coming back from the bar to where the large flat screen was set up, and prayed to God that her friends weren't among them. The rush of noise was blocked out by their two hearts, beating together as one.

5…

His cologne combined with her perfume and the scent of hot apple cider and champagne was intoxicating, and she found herself feeling hazy and yet everything was so sharp and clear at the moment:

4…

There was only him. And her. And him. Him and her, their eyes connected as his arm fluidly wrapped around her and she felt his warmth penetrating what seemed to be her very soul. Perhaps she was being dramatic, but in the moment, all she could do was feel, and this was what she truly felt.

3…

It was too much. Too much… That was all her overwhelmed mind could think, and she almost wanted to skitter away, much like the coy heroine did in all those romance novels.

But she wasn't being coy.

This was so real, it was almost painful, and at the same time… beautiful.

2…

Her eyes seemed to show her distress, because his lost a bit of their intensity, and softened, the embers in his eyes now smouldering. I know, but may I? They seemed to say, and she let go of the breath she didn't know she had been holding, and she communicated a final word to him through her jade orbs.

Yes.

1…

Time seemed to slow, and it was as though she knew what was going to happen before it did, like some odd sense of being able to see the future...

"Happy New Year," He murmured, as jubilant cries of "Happy New Year!" were heard and couples around them locked lips. He leaned in, and kissed her cheek, lightly brushing against her skin, enough to make her flush with a child-like innocence she didn't know she still possessed.

0…

He let go of her, and for a moment, she felt oddly empty. She was in a dream-like state, and everything was blurred, out of focus, except for him. He was always there, through good and bad.

He was always there for her, and what he meant to her… no words would ever be able to express that.

Perhaps some day in the future, she would be able to say the words she longed to say, the words she'd always known but never could bring herself to reveal, not when she was the leader of a splintering family and their world seemed forever at stake.

Maybe it would be next year, maybe it would be in the next ten, but she had hope that one day, the morning would dawn as golden as her dreams, which would finally be fulfilled.

But for now, she would content herself with every look, every gaze and every touch, until the time came when she was no longer encumbered by duty.

So she smiled up at him through her heavy-lidded gaze, and when she spoke, it came out as a breathy whisper.

"Happy New Year to you too."


Darling! My Darkling Dove,
How I do so long to speak
Alas duty has encumbered me
Thus resigned to my fate, I must weep

I see you in my mind's eye
As brilliant as the morning sun, for all the world to see
I imagine you lonely, as pensive as the moon
Wondering what will become of you and me

I beg of you, don't lose yourself
To that vermilion haze and let sorrow befall
Wait for me, Darling, every day by the door,
As faithfully as I am yours, after all


Hello! So this is my submission for 39CluesFan-Star and Choclate's "A Year to Remember" Challenge, which for this month was to write something New Years themed. The title of this series is inspired by one of my favorite songs from "Rent" the musical, "Seasons of Love", which I thought was fitting.

I also added two poems that I wrote, which are supposed to be from Amy and Ian's points of view respectively (you can figure out which one is which) and the second poem is a response to the first.