A/N: I have no idea how i came up with this...so enjoy! Angsty Nat!

Yes. I was listening to "Give Me Novacaine" when i heard this...

REVIEW PLEASE!

Disclaimer: Don't own anything!

My grandfather always told me that when he got older, he'd always look back on all the scars that he had and he'd remember those good times. But in my case, this is a whole different story.

When I started high school I got in the wrong crowd and I...how do I put this? I would cut myself. Like actually cutting. I always felt like I was just invisible. That I was a mistake, the make-up baby. And everyone knew it. I wasn't special. I wasn't even normal...

So when I put that blade to my wrist I felt powerful. I could cause such pain. I could take my emotions out on myself, a worthless piece of shit.

The scars from my cuts still haunt me. They mock me and remind me that at one point, I was worthless. No one wanted me...Not even myself...

But those scars have healed. I still have scars that are fresh. Not on my wrists but in my head. Every time my mom mentions my brother's name, the wound gets deeper. Every time they choose him over me, I feel pain. And the only way I know how to bandage it is the drugs.

It doesn't heal my scars, but it eases them. It's like Novacaine.

My own personal Novacaine...

So what'll happen years from now when I look back at my scars? Will I feel proud? Or ashamed? Only time will tell...

A/N: Poor Nat...=(

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