Wounded
By: *Heather*
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from the show ER.
Author's note: This fic happens right after *the kiss* in "Lockdown". Don't get frustrated if you don't like the way the story goes- I assure you, it IS a carby, I just really, REALLY like angsty Abby... And I did not review my own fic, my sister was logged on under me when she read and reviewed it... lmao...
Chapter 1: This is not happening...
*~*~*~*~*
This is not happening.
How could it be? This is the kind of thing that happened only in dreams, in fantasies. This is the perfect moment that everyone on earth dreams about, that moment when time seems to simply expand.
And for Abby Lockhart, it was happening in a quarantine room at County General... In a hot, sticky, disgusting hospital room, probably inhabited by a fatal disease. Her moment...
Then it all came crashing down. It all became a blur after that moment- Was it me? Was it him? All they knew was that in one moment, they visited heaven, and it was suddenly over.
She broke away.
*~*~*~*~*
"I can't..."
After such blessed silence, words rushed in like an invader. Their foreheads leaned against one another in mutual shock. Carter turned Abby's head upward at his own with a heartbreaking look upon his face. She had to turn away. His eyes were too much to bear.
"What's wrong?"
Carter's voice wasn't convicting, he spoke with pure and beautiful concern.
"I can't do this..."
"So you say,"
"...not here, not now."
"Don't do this to me Abby..."
The statement went straight from his lips to pierce a deep hole in Abby's heart. He had no idea how much it hurt her to do this. But she couldn't let this happen. She cared so much for Carter... How badly she wanted only to kiss him one more time... But she couldn't bring him in; into all her hateful issues, her pathetic and angst-filled pit of despair. The thought of hurting him like that kept Abby strong as she pushed him away now.
His hands slipped away from her body as Abby backed slowly away. She had made such a terrible mistake, letting her guard down in such a moment of weakness for the both of them. She had made things so much worse, completely beyond repair. There was no going back, or forward.
"You should go see if Susan needs you... the vaccine clinic..."
Carter said the words with absolutely no emotion, no feeling. He looked at Abby the same way. She could feel the tension in the room, and it was feeling more like hatred with every advancing second. She crossed the room to the door, and her whispered, tearful "I'm sorry," went completely unnoticed by an anguished Carter.
*~*~*~*~*
"Abby! I was just coming to get you! We're ready to begin..."
Susan's expression changed rapidly when she saw Abby's moist eyes.
"What happened?"
Abby had to take a moment to recover from her desperate shock, and focus on the person standing in front of her.
"Oh... Oh, I'm fine really... I guess the heat is really getting to me."
Susan looked cautiously back at the room from which Abby had come.
"You don't have a fever do you?"
Abby smiled her world-class fake smile. The smile that never really fooled anyone.
"I'm fine. Let's get started on the vaccine..."
"I'll be right there. I'm gonna go check on Carter..."
Abby did a double take at the sound of his name. The last thing he probably wanted right now was company.
"I uh, I just checked his temperature, actually. He's fine..." She choked a little recalling the events.
Susan looked at Abby, then back at the door. She reluctantly followed Abby towards the vaccination room, her mind buzzing from exhaustion and curiosity.
Abby fought in vain against herself to keep from thinking entirely.
By: *Heather*
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from the show ER.
Author's note: This fic happens right after *the kiss* in "Lockdown". Don't get frustrated if you don't like the way the story goes- I assure you, it IS a carby, I just really, REALLY like angsty Abby... And I did not review my own fic, my sister was logged on under me when she read and reviewed it... lmao...
Chapter 1: This is not happening...
*~*~*~*~*
This is not happening.
How could it be? This is the kind of thing that happened only in dreams, in fantasies. This is the perfect moment that everyone on earth dreams about, that moment when time seems to simply expand.
And for Abby Lockhart, it was happening in a quarantine room at County General... In a hot, sticky, disgusting hospital room, probably inhabited by a fatal disease. Her moment...
Then it all came crashing down. It all became a blur after that moment- Was it me? Was it him? All they knew was that in one moment, they visited heaven, and it was suddenly over.
She broke away.
*~*~*~*~*
"I can't..."
After such blessed silence, words rushed in like an invader. Their foreheads leaned against one another in mutual shock. Carter turned Abby's head upward at his own with a heartbreaking look upon his face. She had to turn away. His eyes were too much to bear.
"What's wrong?"
Carter's voice wasn't convicting, he spoke with pure and beautiful concern.
"I can't do this..."
"So you say,"
"...not here, not now."
"Don't do this to me Abby..."
The statement went straight from his lips to pierce a deep hole in Abby's heart. He had no idea how much it hurt her to do this. But she couldn't let this happen. She cared so much for Carter... How badly she wanted only to kiss him one more time... But she couldn't bring him in; into all her hateful issues, her pathetic and angst-filled pit of despair. The thought of hurting him like that kept Abby strong as she pushed him away now.
His hands slipped away from her body as Abby backed slowly away. She had made such a terrible mistake, letting her guard down in such a moment of weakness for the both of them. She had made things so much worse, completely beyond repair. There was no going back, or forward.
"You should go see if Susan needs you... the vaccine clinic..."
Carter said the words with absolutely no emotion, no feeling. He looked at Abby the same way. She could feel the tension in the room, and it was feeling more like hatred with every advancing second. She crossed the room to the door, and her whispered, tearful "I'm sorry," went completely unnoticed by an anguished Carter.
*~*~*~*~*
"Abby! I was just coming to get you! We're ready to begin..."
Susan's expression changed rapidly when she saw Abby's moist eyes.
"What happened?"
Abby had to take a moment to recover from her desperate shock, and focus on the person standing in front of her.
"Oh... Oh, I'm fine really... I guess the heat is really getting to me."
Susan looked cautiously back at the room from which Abby had come.
"You don't have a fever do you?"
Abby smiled her world-class fake smile. The smile that never really fooled anyone.
"I'm fine. Let's get started on the vaccine..."
"I'll be right there. I'm gonna go check on Carter..."
Abby did a double take at the sound of his name. The last thing he probably wanted right now was company.
"I uh, I just checked his temperature, actually. He's fine..." She choked a little recalling the events.
Susan looked at Abby, then back at the door. She reluctantly followed Abby towards the vaccination room, her mind buzzing from exhaustion and curiosity.
Abby fought in vain against herself to keep from thinking entirely.
