Disclaimer: I'm merely using the characters from the show, 'RWBY', for this fic. RWBY is owned by Monty Oum & Rooster Teeth.
"If everyone fought for their own convictions, there would be no war." - Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace
Chapter II: Catharsis
Jaune's POV:
Jaune Arc was understandably confused when he was gazing at the skies: It was a while since he had seen a launcher pad. They were once used in the wars - but they were too inefficient for the fight against Cinder and Salem.
Was he dead? Jaune looked around him - his fists tightening with his gloves - looking down, he noticed that his armour hadn't been fused with Pyrrha's armour yet.
Jaune denied the reality around him - thinking it was impossible to exist in such a state. He had sacrificed himself to delay Cinder and Salem; a tactic that worked, causing RWBY and JNPR to stop them: 'The world was safe! How long has it been?' He could feel a feeling of cognitive dissonance; in a futile attempt to explain his circumstances: 'Why was this happening? Why is Ozpin, Glynda, Weiss and Pyrrha here in the same place? Why?'
So why was he here? Why did he come back? How did he go from sacrificing himself, losing Crocea Mors, to seeing Ozpin and Glynda again?
"Mr Arc - are you alright?" Ozpin, to be frank, looked concerned. It was bizarre how Jaune froze up after a moment of nonchalance, as if he was denying the reality around him. With a shaky breath, Jaune spoke: "Yes, Headmaster, I'm alright." Jaune had noticed how Cardin was just launched into the air - meaning that he had to make a landing strategy. Ozpin gazed at him with a worrisome look; the boy shrugging as he put his hands into his pockets.
"By the way, Headmaster, what's a landing STRATEEEE-".
Jaune Arc was launched into the air - gazing at his friends; who were now lacking the scars of the war. Nobody noticed Jaune's tears of joy as he smiled. It was pleasant - almost peaceful this time. Jaune was holding a thumbs up to Yang - who was smiling at him: "Good luck, Vomit Boy!" Yang gave him a cheeky wink.
Jaune Arc waved towards Pyrrha; who was shaking her head with a smile. "It's a bird; it's a scroll; it's a-!"
The Arc would've finished his monologue; if it weren't for getting nailed to a tree by Pyrrha's spear. 'Was it Akouo or Milos? It's been so long..." Jaune was in genuine shock when he was looking at the sight of Pyrrha, gazing at the skies in wonder. Perhaps, Pyrrha was affected by the conversation that he had earlier.
That conversation went the same; but it was a story for another time.
Jaune clenched his fists, slowing his breathing in a quick attempt to calm himself down: 'Besides,' Jaune blinked the tears away, 'I can't let myself be disadvantaged - Pyrrha doesn't need to know of that bitch, Cinder. At least, not yet. Pyrrha doesn't need an awkward and bizarre person as a friend, does she? Then again, she always helped others; despite how they acted.'
Then, his thoughts tasted like ash in his mouth. After all of his efforts, the times he spent with his friends, the people Jaune cared about - it was all for nothing. Jaune had a feeling that he'd lost the moment that he had fell into the hole. But, in a way, his Weiss gave him a chance: "To give everyone an ending they deserve."
He'd never meet his Weiss - except after his death.
If he ever saw her again, he'd thank her for it.
'Then thank her by giving the present a future.' Ren's words stung like a Nightstalker's tail - the pain being almost unbearable for him. He knew that people wished to go back to fix mistakes; but the worst thing about this was that Jaune would either make mistakes or new events would spring up.
This meant that he couldn't fix things.
Even then...
There was no way that this was happening. This can't be real - Pyrrha is dead.
At least my Pyrrha is, anyway.
"So, where does that leave us?"
"What was that?" Pyrrha looked at Jaune with a soft gaze, her eyebrow raising slightly. Jaune shrugged; "I suppose it could be how nervous I am - considering how risky this initiation is." Jaune gave her a brittle smile, hesitantly adding a thumbs up to pacify her.
Pyrrha Nikos sighed at the person beyond her - Jaune Arc - the man who hadn't recognised her as the four-time Mistral Regional Tournament Champion, but as Pyrrha Nikos. But what was odd was his expression: It looked as if he was about to break down at the sight of her.
Just who was Jaune Arc?
Jaune took a husky breathe, before nodding with Pyrrha - signalling that they were partners for the next four years. 'Again,' Jaune noted with dejection, 'But it's a second chance - I won't let her die this time. I won't let any of RWBY or JNPR die.'
Jaune gazed at a picture of Team JNPR and RWBY together - with Jaune huddling near Team RWBY; Nora was lifting her hammer - before shouting something about smashing. Ren looked serious - though there were noticeable bags underneath his eyes: 'Odd - Ren has never looked tired; not even after the Breach. Perhaps, I never did look out for him.'
Jaune sighed.
The only person missing was Pyrrha - but she wasn't gone, anymore.
Pyrrha was right in front of him.
Jaune didn't notice Crocea Mors tightly gripped in his hands, shining against the glistening tears.
"Hi, Pyrrha. Could you get me down now? I know you nailed the throw; but I don't want you to spearhead my death."
Pyrrha retrieved her spear with her semblance.
Jaune fell to the ground face-first.
"Thanks, Pyrrha."
Location: Emerald Forest
Timeline: Beacon, Season 1
Mission: Reunite Team JNPR - deal with the Deathstalker and the Nevermore.
Jaune's POV/Third Person:
When it came down to it - Jaune should've expected Pyrrha to dot over him as if she was his mother. That expression, admittedly, was creepy - though he should have noticed this. He couldn't help but wonder: 'Was Pyrrha's death the reason why I became so strong? What would have happened if Pyrrha wasn't killed by Cinder? Would I still be here?' Looking at the redhead - he gripped his fists - before putting on a smile as she turned around.
"Are you okay, Jaune? You don't seem well." Pyrrha gazed at him with the look. That look always forced him to tell her what was on his mind - which in turn - developed the partnership between the two of them. Jaune had shared many secrets with his past partner, but he hadn't even told her that he faked his transcripts in this timeline.
It was going to be a pain telling everyone, again.
He blinked for a few moments - allowing silence to reign into the forest, before speaking: "I'm fine, Pyr." Pyrrha snapped her head at him - her face becoming slightly red at her nickname: 'Seriously, Pyrrha? Was I that dense?' Chuckles escaped his lips; shaking his head as they walked on. Jaune stopped chuckling when they had reached the Deathstalker's cave.
In what seemed like a moment of stupidity to Pyrrha, there was a pause: "I'll go in first - you don't know what's in there. Stay behind me and prepare to run away if I end up harmed, to say the least." Pyrrha grabbed my arm, looking with a fierce gaze - a moment later letting go of my red hand - her face burning: "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to!" Jaune put a finger to her mouth - telling her to remain silent - "Wait, I'm hearing something. Get out of here."
"No, Jaune; I'm not leaving my partner behind."
Pyrrha glared at Jaune - shaking her head: "I'm not the kind of person who abandons the people I care about." Jaune raised an eyebrow at her; noticing that Pyrrha got flustered as she said that: 'I'm flattered that she cares, but isn't that a bit of a rush?' His partner was still apologising to him; becoming more red as she did so.
'Then again - she's Pyrrha. She didn't have many friends because she was known as Pyrrha Nikos - the fourth time Mistral Regional Tournament Champion.'
Only then, did he notice his red hand.
'Monty Oum - her grip is hard as hell. Thank Oum I didn't piss her off in the original timeline.' It was going to be acknowledged that Pyrrha was a fierce opponent to fight, even in the grip department, until the appearance of a gargantuan scorpion Grimm appeared. The noises becoming louder as the Deathstalker got closer to them - gazing around the trees for any opponents.
The armour on the Grimm extended from its chest to its arms, with its tail protected by protruding spikes. The tail was protected by an exterior armor; its scratches indicating the Deathstalker has had a few fights. Pyrrha looked to her partner - mouthing at him to run - a few moments passed.
"Honestly, Pyr. It seems the two of us just hate leaving the other, don't we?" Jaune teased; momentarily smirking when Pyrrha shook her head a bit too quickly. Only to notice a stinger moving towards them - to kill them.
"Shit! Look out, Pyrrha!"
He grabbed Pyrrha, only for the scorpion to screech - interrupted by a thunderous slam of a hammer knocking its exoskeleton. Jaune took a deep breath - before turning to look at the two newcomers. I was already on the Deathstalker; trying to jump over it - only to be slammed in my midsection.
Did anyone tell people about how hard those Deathstalkers hit?
Jaune found that he couldn't breathe at all - there was Nora with her hammer alongside Lie Ren, who was as calm as always. They were both the same people: the same clothes; the same ideals; the same faces. Remnant stopped moving for a moment - before Pyrrha snapped him out of his stupor. She grabbed his shoulders, looking at his eyes with concern, which Jaune dismissed with faint frustration.
Pyrrha put out her hand; motioning for him to accept it. Nodding, Jaune grabbed her hand - being lifted up back onto his feet.
He couldn't be weak - the last time Jaune was weak, the woman who was standing in front of him had died. Team JNPR was never the same after the Breach - after Cinder's attack.
"Cinder..." As Jaune dashed at the Nightstalker - he couldn't help but only feel sadness.
That was it. What did anyone else expect? Anger? Hatred?
There was nothing to feel about Cinder; not anymore. The Cinder who murdered Pyrrha was gone. He couldn't avenge her, now.
None of his friends were left - only copies of them remained.
They'd never be the same people that he defended; the same people he fought for. They were all gone.
Jaune shook his head - looking at Ren, Nora and Pyrrha before nodding - before his eyes were filled with shock when he looked at Ren.
But - perhaps - he was given a mercy when someone looked at him in familiarity. Was he mistaking this? Was he denying everything - trying to force himself to believe a lie?
He recognised what he was doing; there was an unmistakable look of familiarity on his face.
But it was impossible - there were only three ways: An alternate universe being responsible for this mishap, one of the other members remembering the past - most likely Ren. Perhaps, he could "test" Ren.
"Ren, shoot at the stinger! Pyrrha, throw your shield at the stinger to cut off its tail! Nora, use Pyrrha's shield to throw yourself into the air - before driving the stinger into its head with Magnhild, now!" Both Ren and Nora's eyes widened at the implication - before nodding at each other. Nora was being the usual - but there was something odd. Ren was taking the Deathstalker more viciously than last time. Pyrrha was the same as usual.
"Alright - FEARSOME SCORPION - FEAR MY HAMMER!" A brutal crack appeared on the Deathstalker's armor; stunned by the electricity pulsing from Magnhild. Jaune noticed Nora's crazy grin - before shrugging: "Time to break some legs, I guess."
Nora's head twisted quickly; Jaune swore that he heard a snap: "Did you just say that it was time to break some legs?" Nora had a shit-eating grin on her face; before Jaune nodded with a small smile: "Why not?"
The girl proceeded to scream something about a god - before slamming the hammer into the scorpion - the noises of metal screeching noted.
"STOP, HAMMER TIME!"
Ren had a small smirk on his face; shrugging when Jaune looked at him with a look that screamed 'What's even going on?': "Don't worry about it - she's always like that." Jaune nodded; before giving Ren a small smile: "Figured - I bet she'd like pancakes."
Ren held his breath for a second; his smirk turning to a smile: "I thought I was the only one who understood. It's nice to see another person who has the same understanding as I do." Jaune noted that it translated as: 'I thought that I was the only one who remembered; it's nice seeing you again - Jaune.'
"Same here; it was a struggle being the only one who understood."
Nora perked up; gazing at the pair: "Did you guys say something about pancakes?" She became excited at the mention of pancakes; twitching on the spot - before running towards the Deathstalker: "FEARSOME SCORPION; FOR MY PANCAKES - FACE MY WRATH!" Pyrrha was laughing; one of her hands near her mouth as she coughed.
'Never change, Nora. By the time everything's sorted out; I'll make a pancake fortress and we can make the first Food War occur.' Jaune cursed; noticing the stinger about to swipe at Ren.
To stop Ren from being thrown into a tree - Jaune jumped onto the exoskeleton of the Deathstalker, repeatedly stabbing Crocea Mors into its head, destroying pieces of the exoskeleton - gazing at Nora as she slammed her hammer down onto the cut-off stinger, with the Deathstalker screeching in pain, flailing. Jaune had jumped off - the only noise being that of flesh crushing itself. Flesh ripping itself into pieces; exposing the black liquid falling down onto the ground.
With the Deathtstalker's corpse on the floor - Ren and Jaune stared at each other. Jaune had stared in shock; Nora was struck silent in confusion and Ren was rapidly thinking; trying to come up with something to say: "Who was on the bridge when she fought-?"
"You were. We'll talk later, Jaune." Ren stood calmly; his face betraying no emotions. He shook his head; walking ahead. All that remained was the ambience of the forest; with two of his teammates froze in ponder.
'They're tense - almost as if they haven't seen each other in a long time - yet in disbelief over how they're still alive...'
'Just what's going on, here? Why is Renny acting as if he hasn't seen this person for a long time?'
The reformed team walked towards the temple.
Jaune limped.
The screams are gone.
There was a foreign lull of peace within the room; no more corpses; no more death.
The fire has been put out - replaced with something else - something that makes the fire look like mere cinders.
The wind does not howl; it roars.
But lightning has entered the game; striking ferociously at all its opponents.
Ren's POV:
Team JNPR had managed to get to the Abandoned Temple - to his relief. It seemed that Team RWBY hadn't lost against the Nevermore that they were supposed to fight together - so it seemed that they had split to focus on one enemy at a time. Ren was beginning to wonder about the possibility of Team RWBY knowing what happened in the original timeline - before shaking his head. The only method of knowing that answer wouldn't be necessary.
It wouldn't work - without a doubt.
Jaune Arc refused to look at him - not because of their lack of trust in each other or any conflict at all - it was because they couldn't believe that all of them were alive and well. It felt like yesterday when Jaune had sacrificed himself to delay Cinder - which ultimately gave the remaining members of Team JNPR and Team RWBY to defeat Salem and Cinder.
At the end of the battle - a destabilising source of energy had appeared - causing glitches in the skies. It was almost like a metaphysical bug - yet it didn't make any sense. Why would there be something only occurring in programs occurring in their reality? Was their reality real?
Were they real?
Team JNPR had taken the pieces as before - Nora had picked the first white rook, with Jaune picking the second white rook piece. Fortunately, they had the time to rest - as the Initiation went without a hitch, other than fighting the Deathstalker. Last time, they did have to run from a Nevermore and a Deathstalker.
Jaune looked at the three of them - Nora was looking between the two of them. Pyrrha was thinking deeply about something. Jaune was fixated; looking at them. Ren was attempting to convince himself that this wasn't real; that this couldn't be real. Jaune was walking alongside them; towards the exit of the Emerald Forest. A chuckle escaped the Arc's lips: "I'd never imagine that this'd happen."
Jaune proceeded to put his arm on Lie Ren's shoulders - looming at him with a long gaze - before their eyes went in shock.
The world stopped breathing; the Grimm stopped hunting; the people stopped killing - the fire stopped burning.
Remnant stopped functioning.
They were real.
Nora rode in on a Major Ursa - Weiss was riding a Nevermore - everything was the same.
Jaune walked ahead alongside Lie Ren - distrustful of his own voice.
"Wait a moment, Renny." Nora gazed at him with shock. "Is this him? He's your other friend - from years back?"
"Yes." Ren nodded.
"He's Jaune Arc - a friend who I haven't seen in years."
Then, Initiation was finished.
Jaune's POV:
Late into the night, The boy looked at the shattered moon - listening to the hymns of jazz a few buildings before him; the raindrops making him feel cold. He twitched over how cold it was - but it was an enjoyable experience. He could hear the soft taps - two pairs of steps shuffling towards him - Jaune sighed.
The rain always calmed him down; when you were fighting a war on the remains of a planet, you couldn't bring yourself to ease. Grimm were everywhere, from the mindless to the wise, they were there. Jaune remembered the corpses lying down on the grass; the screams etched from their faces; the bones and skulls that he had ascertained.
"I figured you'd be here, Jaune." A quiet voice was present - Jaune was hard-pressed to get his weapon out - as he was still getting used to being surprised without the impending danger. Jaune twitched at his friend: "Considering what happened; I can't trust myself to think - after everything." He noticed Nora was behind him - with a few plates of pancakes. He motioned his hand; asking her for one of the plates; Nora nodded: "Cheers, Nora."
Nora pat his shoulder - which Jaune noticed was shaking - but he didn't expect that it was from the cold. She turned to leave; climbing into one of the windows; going back inside.
It was just Ren and Jaune.
Just the two of them.
It was a quiet night for the group: Team JNPR had already set up how their rooms were going to work; their belongings were unpacked; everyone was exhausted; it would be the perfect opportunity for them to fall asleep. Pyrrha was asleep, anyway. Nora looked exhausted - it wouldn't be a surprise if she fell asleep on the floor.
Then, there was the lull of peace. People were walking; talking amongst others; hearing the music from a few clubs. A gaze at Junior's club noted a few men repairing the place; a few windows still smashed.
It was peaceful. There would be just silence.
If it weren't for the fact that Ren and Jaune were discussing about the situation. Jaune, after an awkward silence, sighed: "As much as I am grateful that you're here; I have a hunch that things went wrong in the original situation." Jaune felt dreadful - at what he was saying. He wanted to believe with all of his heart that everything went well, that RWBY were alive, that the rest of his friends would be peaceful...
Jaune would have rested in peace; knowing that their plans had stopped - that Salem would shriek as Team RWBY finished her off. Cinder with all of her fear and desperate rage; Crocea Mors falling down with him.
The darkness...
But the fact that Jaune Arc wasn't alone on his task meant - to his hearts protest - that it wasn't like that. Lie Ren took a quiet breath. "Yes, you're correct - your sacrifice wasn't enough." Jaune could feel the warm liquid threatening to escape his eyes, Ren slowly becoming quiet and "It wasn't nearly enough, Jaune." Ren wiped his eyes because of how tired he was - Jaune gazing at Vale in sadness: "Everyone died. We won; but all of us died."
"All of you?"
A silence went between the two of them: 'Please - tell me that Weiss lived a happy life. Tell me that Yang finally got out of her ordeal with Adam, that Blake led the White Fang, that Ruby finally made peace with the death of her mother. But, this is probably the truth - I wouldn't be surprised.'
He acknowledged it; the denial - the refusal to believe that someone was dead.
Ren sighed.
"I don't know. I'm not sure - but I think so. I think we're the only ones left from back there."
Jaune stood up; looking at Ren. He looked at him - Ren looked like as if he wasn't sleeping, bags of eyes underneath him - Jaune was tapping his fingers on the bricks of the rooftop - silence reigning across as the rain struck down at them. Their efforts; their strife and ambitions - they were all for nothing.
Jaune gazed at the city of Vale - in horror - he realised that his efforts; the pain; everything; it was all for nothing.
A flash of a city before him - a bastion of death the next.
His promise to Pyrrha was nothing. His promise to Ren and Nora - that they'd be alright - was for nothing. His promise to Weiss, his promise to Yang, Ruby and everyone else! Jaune's hand ended up bleeding from his grip; his teeth chattering between each other - trying to control all of his anger, his hate with all that he had.
"Jaune, listen..."
"I know. I'm sorry that I wasn't there; I really am. I should've done something; I should've been there for you all. Instead, I chose to sacrifice myself - to delay the inevitable. It had been for nothing, Ren. We're back; we died and came back. How do you feel about that? Do you look at Nora - sadly wondering about the days when she'd talk about pancakes? Ruby and Nora are their normal selves - they all are."
Ren sighed - his breath unsteady.
"Ruby died in my arms; Jaune." Ren's hush of breath made Jaune's eyes water. "She died in my arms - knowing that I failed to protect her from Mercury Black." Jaune never imagined the man speaking of a person with such hatred. Ren never did speak with this much emotion - he never did. "I despise that man, Jaune. I know it's surprising for me to talk so much - but considering what happened? I don't think I can bottle everything up again."
"As for Nora - please - I don't want to talk about her." Ren's eyes became sunken; showing the black bags underneath his eyes: "I don't want to tell you, I don't think I'll ever stop thinking about her, I never will." His voice decreased to a silent breath, looking away in thought.
Jaune's eyes seemed to sink in thought; trailing the buildings of Beacon Academy - a macabre series of structures echoing the past. They stood there; head high as they did before the Breach - before the destruction, pain and death. Once filled with shattered windows, corpses and hollow walls - replaced by shining structures that seemed to hold themselves with pride.
Ren sat on the floor; feeling the cold water sinking into his hands - the violent rain being their only answer to the events around them. His arms shook; his eyes closed. Their regrets; their dreams, they didn't exist. The only thing that'd help people understand would be a window showing a mere glance - it'd be like showing a dance except you couldn't see the people around them; the stage or the music. You'd only see the shadows of the dancers.
How could you explain your issues to people who were once dead?
"But what about you! Why are you here with me? What happened, Ren? What happened to you?"Ren looked at Jaune - gazing down the buildings; gripping one of the arms; Jaune shook his head. A cacophony of silence reverberated through the area.
Ren stepped forward; touching his face; before he paused: "Jaune, I failed. I'm sorry." Jaune hugged him; a moment of silence occurred. Jaune couldn't stop his arms from shaking; he looked at Ren for an explanation - only to receive a sad glance in return.
"I know how it feels, Ren." Jaune removed himself; patting Ren's shoulder. "To miss the people who are gone, to miss the people who were buried six feet under, to miss the people who you couldn't save." Jaune chuckled: "The way I see it, I can't afford to care about it."
"You're still alive - everyone's okay. It's just a nightmare."
Ren slowly sat down; only grabbing his hand as he did so. The two men sat on the roof; staring at the beautiful moon above. There was only silence; no noise was registered between the two of them. The skies were beautiful - giving off a sense of peace.
But tonight; rain drops weren't the only things that were soaking their clothes.
Ruby
Ruby was sitting in her bed-room; thinking.
'Jaune's such a strange boy; he's a bit awkward - like me.'
'There's something about him. I don't know what; but there's something that makes him different from most people.'
But wasn't that the same for her? Wasn't she the bees knees to everyone? All she wanted was to be known as Ruby Rose; the weapons fanatic, the girl obsessed with cookies. Meeting Jaune had made her feel at home; like she belonged to this place. Jaune made her feel as if she was the girl who obsessed over cookies and weapons.
It was weird having a friend in Beacon; her friends back at Signal were still talking to her - but it sucked: 'I can't see them; I can't eat cookies with them nor can I talk about the latest Weapons Magazine with them. It's only Beacon this and Beacon that. Why did Headmaster Ozpin invite me to this place? It couldn't have been the robbery, could it?'
Ruby didn't know about Headmaster Ozpin - she didn't know anyone that well. She was thankful that Jaune and Yang were there for her: 'Jaune's always so sad when he thinks no one's looking. I wonder what's up with him.'
Ruby shook her head: 'No, it's not my business.'
Jaune's POV:
Jaune looked at Ren - getting soaked by the intense rain. He covered his face with his hands; Jaune slowly sat down, crumbling like paper - his arms and legs retreating into its own space. Ren was on the ground; listening to the raindrops in a peaceful silence.
"I'm so sorry -" Jaune hesitated. "I'm so sorry that I couldn't save you."
Ren's expression turned into that of determination.
"Stop it, Jaune. The only thing that we can do is to help; it's the only way."
"Just stop regretting everything."
Ren and Jaune gazed at each other; turning to look at the stars in silence.
"They're beautiful - aren't they?" Ren stood up; nodding as he did so. A yawn escaped his lips - then a quiet sigh - before stretching his arms. "The stars? They'll always be like that; you know. The stars will keep shining - the cracked moon will keep orbiting Remnant - nothing changes."
"So, what's the point in doing this, Ren? Why should we bother?" Jaune held a curious look - silently thinking - the raindrops giving a sense of peace.
Ren gave a small smile; shrugging: "That's the wrong question to ask, Jaune."
"Then what's the right question to ask?"
It was a momentary rest for the two of them. A chance to reflect; to help each other get back from their past issues - this timeline and the past timeline's pasts. Jaune was dead still; mulling over the question. Ren phased out - sorting out his thoughts.
The Arc gazed at their dorm - as well as Team RWBY's dorm - before noticing a smiling Ruby in one of the windows.
Jaune waved at her - the girl beamed; giving him a frantic wave.
Then, Jaune stood up - looking at his friend who was nodding.
"Why not? It's not like as if we can't help."
Eventually, both individuals went back into Team JNPR's dorm, dragging themselves into a peaceful slumber.
Codex Of Philosophies
Lie Ren's Philosophy
I remember the feeling of jumping; gazing at the Grimm below, holding Ruby in my arms.
The look of the darkness; Ruby's pale face and Nora's screams for my help changed me.
Never thought I'd change; never thought that Lie Ren would end up weak.
Lie Ren failed to help Nora when she needed me the most; after all of those times that she helped me.
Every time - when Nora speaks to me; laughs with me; hugs me - I feel guilty.
I never tell anyone of it though; it might be seen as a show of a facade, but I feel that I need to be the pillar of strength.
I suppose that in a sense; I'm lying to Nora.
It's a horrible thing to do.
Wisdom is useful; having the strength to return from your failures and fight again is essential.
