The sudden return to full lighting temporarily blinded the crew on the bridge. Wanting an immediate update, Picard called, "Picard to LaForge."
"Report."
"LaForge here, sir," he sounded tired but ebullient as he delivered his report. "We've got main power and life support back online. However, propulsion, weapons, and shields are out of commission until we get some serious help. From the damage I'm seeing, I think we're going to need a tow back to drydock, sir."
Picard sighed and ended the communication. Tugging down his uniform top, he prepared to direct Data to launch several distress beacons when he noticed all activity on the bridge had ceased.
Raking his gaze around the room, Picard should have seen each member of his command crew busy at their tasks. Instead, silence pervaded the frozen tableau on the bridge.
The reality, and underlying implications, of what the crew were seeing was only just beginning to set in. Realizing the situation was becoming intensely uncomfortable, Deanna Troi moved to break the silence, "Sir? I think…"
Riker, eyes twinkling, interjected, "Sir, with all due respect, I think if you decided to take the new position as head of stellar sciences, you really ought to have told me first."
"What?!" Picard was flummoxed. "Number One, I don't…" his words trailed off as he noticed Riker's very pointed glance at his uniform.
Dread and apprehension filled him as he looked down. There, instead of the familiar burgundy of command, he found the deep blue of a science officer's uniform – a blue that matched the incredibly enchanting eyes of the red-headed woman whose uniform this was. Memories of how her uniform had ended up, along with his, in a jumbled pile on the floor of his quarters came unbidden to mind.
Quickly bringing himself back to the present, he swore under his breath, "Merde."
If a hull breach had opened under his feet and swallowed him forever, he would have been thankful. Instead, he was staring into the eyes of his First Officer, who was exerting every ounce of strength he possessed not to fall down laughing.
Attempting to salvage what was rapidly becoming a horrifically embarrassing situation, Picard replied, "Well Number One, as you can see, I was giving the position some serious thought." Picard's eyes gleamed as he continued, "But after trying it on for size, it just didn't seem to be the right 'fit' for me."
Willing himself not to laugh, Riker replied, "No, sir."
"I'm afraid I'm too set in my ways to change careers at this point. It was an interesting experiment, but I think I will change back into my regular uniform," explained Picard. "What do you think, Commander?"
Almost choking, Riker replied, "An excellent idea, sir."
"Well, if that's settled," he allowed his gaze to pass over each crew member, "I think we should get back to the task at hand."
"Number One, you have the bridge," Picard added as he tried to make a dignified exit. "If you need me, I'll be in my Ready Room."
Out of habit, Picard tugged on the hem of his uniform, cringed, and sincerely hoped something equally humiliating was occurring in sickbay as he stalked off the bridge.
