Hello everyone. So here we are again for another chapter!

Two: Without a Cause

Bella made it a point of avoiding her father after her outburst that morning. She couldn't stand to look at him. Mainly because she knew that deep within her, she wanted desperately to tell him. She wanted someone – anyone – to know what went on during the summer. She couldn't go to Jacob about it because of how awkward things were now. Going to Edward was out of the question. As for her normal friends, one secret could endanger them. And her mother would think her insane, surely. So who then? Who could she possibly talk to? Who could she confide in? Though she spent all day trying to come up with an answer, none came. As she walked into the forest, she felt her heart grow lower and lower. With every step, she realized further and further that she was truly alone.

But then... she had caused this. Her loneliness was of her own devices. She made a choice that day... A choice not to side with either party. She might have already ruined her friendship with Jacob, and attempting to turn back the clock with Edward would be too painful. She wondered vaguely if things would ever go back to the way things were...

Perhaps she should move to Jacksonville with her mother? Sunshine... a fresh start. She doubted there were any vampires in Florida. And she could visit the beach. A beach where it wouldn't freeze her to swim in. Perhaps she could make new friends... new relationships. She began to think of herself with a regular boy, going on regular dates. Perhaps going to college there... getting a decent job. Nothing glamorous.

But she knew that such a life would never please her.

Finally finding herself in the thick of the woods, she sat herself down at the base of a moss ridden tree. Her eyes went to the clearing beside her. She realized then... that this was the exact spot nearly a year ago that she discovered Edward's secret. If she had never gone for a walk that evening, if she had never fallen asleep... If she remembered how to return home. Or brought a compass. If, if, if... How many "if's" could there be? But there was a part of her that could never fully regret knowing... As for Jacob, her knowledge of vampires had clued her in to his secret. If those rogue vampires had never seen her that day after the snowball fight, Jacob might have kept on tricking her. And she might have continued with her life, blissfully unaware of the world beyond her own.

Lost in thought, Bella found a smooth, rounded rock beside her and tossed it against the tree in front of her. She began to replay that fateful night the year before. How angry he looked... and how frightening. She could remember staring at his bloodied fangs... watching in terror as he devoured the deer. Not to mention the fear that plagued her soon after Bella discovered his true nature. But worse then the fear that followed, was the gullibility. By the end of the winter, she was certain that Edward wouldn't hurt a fly given the choice. And yet, less then a month ago, he proved to her that was not the case.

During the fight between the wolves, the Cullens, and the hunters over the summer, Edward had killed a man right in front of her. Jacob had helped. Even the quite Jasper had shown his true colors that night, having caught the scent of her blood.

Monsters. That's what they all were. That's all they ever were. Just monsters.

She picked up a second rock to throw, a sigh escaping her. Just before it hit the tree, however, a pale hand reached out to grab it. Bella blinked, standing quickly. She was once more in the presence of Edward Cullen. Her heart shot up to her throat, but she remained calm. She didn't realize that the sun had set by then. She would need to leave for home soon. But she made no move to leave. Edward held the rock in his hand before letting it fall to the ground below him. He put his hands behind his back, and there was a silence between them.

"So... how are you today?" Bella gave no answer. Edward let a hand run through his hair. "Doesn't school start in a week?"

The human nodded. "Yeah..." There was another pause. "How's Carlisle?"

"Better." He lightly tapped a bit of dirt with the toe of his shoe. "It's gotten to the point where he'll barely speak to me. I don't know what's worse – that or his yelling." Edward gave a faint smile, but Bella did not react. His smile dropped and he leaned against the tree behind him, hands in his pockets. "He told me that he doesn't care what I do anymore... That anything that I do is completely on me. So that if I screw up, I'm detached from the rest of the family."

Bella thought this over. "So... what, he disowned you or something?"

"Just about." Edward slid himself to a sitting position, picking up the same rock he caught. "Carlisle isn't the kind of person to abandon someone... so he's really just alienating me until I either 'come to my senses' or leave."

"Mm." Usually, Bella would say something along the lines of "that's horrible," or "I'm sorry," but her recent apathy did not just apply to Charlie. "So what does that mean? You can do what you want?"

Edward turned up to look at her, and then turned back to the rock. In a bored fashion, he snapped it in half and tossed one of the pieces aside. He began to break it up again and again until they were nothing more then pebbles. "Kind of. I think he wants me to get responsible or some shit like that."

"It couldn't hurt."

Surprised, he turned up to her. "I mean... let's face it, your past actions haven't been the safest ideas in the world. Going to school, dating me... it's all been very risky."

Frowning, Edward tossed away the rubble and stood, his arms crossed. "Oh? Well if you thought it was so dangerous, why didn't you say anything about it?"

Bella merely shrugged. "It was exciting at the time." Now, she was just sort of used to it. Knowing that Edward was a vampire didn't thrill her like it used to. That seemed to anger him slightly.

"That's it? It was exciting?" He huffed and kicked a rock to the side. "Is that the only reason you were ever with me? Because you thought it was exciting to be with a vampire?"

"Isn't that reason enough?" Bella was blatantly lying by this point. Even if Edward hadn't been a vampire, she probably still would have fallen for him. Beneath his rough appearance, she knew that he was a good person. But she wasn't about to tell him this. It was easier to keep him at an arm's length if he hated her. He glared at her, but she remained stoic.

"I guess it is for a shallow little human like you." Those words didn't really hurt as much as they should have. "God I can't even believe that I wanted you back."

"Why did you? There's plenty of girls that can stand in for Annabell. Why not just seduce a new one instead?" That was low. Very low. But Bella didn't care. Edward's eyes narrowed as she said that.

"You're still on that crap? I told you, you're not a substitute! You never were!" But Bella knew he was wrong. Perhaps he wasn't lying intentionally... but she knew he was wrong. She could remember speaking to him while he spoke in his dreams. He had been confessing his love out loud to whomever was there – which happened to be Bella. And when she asked him to reveal who it was in his heart, he said one name: Anna. When Bella didn't answer him, Edward huffed and turned away. "You don't believe me."

"Of course not."

"Of course not," he repeated. "Right, because I kept so much a secret from you when we were together."

"Not the point."

Edward made a frustrated noise and turned away. He paced back and forth, and Bella watched. As the seconds drifted by, Bella's resolve began to break. She felt her head tip downward, her heart growing sad. She hated how depressed all of this was making her, but how else should she feel? Finally, she said: "I'm sorry. That crossed the line..."

She watched as Edward's feet stopped walking. After a moment's pause, he walked forward. Two cold hands were placed on either of her cheeks, tilting her head upwards. Leaning in as if to kiss her, Edward put their foreheads together. Bella's skin grew goose bumps from the cool temperature, but she remained where she was, her eyes closed. She repeated her apology.

"It's all right," he answered. Finally, he drew her into a gentle embrace, and the two hugged. She could feel his hand stroke her hair from behind. "I'm sorry too... so don't feel so sad... ok...?" Bella hesitated, but soon hugged him around the waist. They stood like that for a long moment before she pulled away.

"It's getting late. Dad'll get worried..." She shivered, the contact of the vampire making her body cold. Noticing this, Edward took off his black jacket.

"Here." He placed it in her hands. "You can give it back to me on Monday. I have others."

She blinked and looked up to him. "Monday...?"

"Yeah." He smiled gently. "I'm still enrolled, remember?"

"Well, yes but..." She gripped the jacket tightly before turning her eyes to the vampire.

"Did you not want me to go...?"

She thought about this for a while. Finally, a sigh came to her. "No... it wouldn't be the same if you didn't." Of course, nothing was the same. But there was no real harm in trying to preserve anything she could to try and keep sane. "I guess I'll see you on Monday then."

Edward nodded. There was a pause before he leaned in, kissing her temple. Bella did nothing but stand there. Without saying a proper goodbye, she turned and began to walk home. She made sure that she was out of his sight before putting the coat onto her chilled body.

Another short chapter... but still...

Review!

~T.