2

Jacob insisted on getting me back to his house before he'd listen to me.

After I was changed, dry and allowed him to force a steaming coffee into my hand, he looked me I the eye, and asked nervously "So, what do we need to talk about...?"

"I... Jake...We..." I leant forward and took his hand. This was going to be difficult.

"Jake, I'm going to try and explain this the best I can, but it's going to be hard. I love you Jake. You're my best friend, your the person I'm closest to in the whole world. Since... After the.. Cullens left, you are my world. No, you're my sun. You make everything, okay, and I can't live without you."

I looked him in the eye. His expression was confused. Clearly, this wasn't what he was expecting.

"You know I feel the same, Bells. You've always known that."

He wasn't getting it, apparently.

"No Jake. I will never be able to live without you. Not now, not in ten, twenty, thirty years. I want to grow old with you, Jacob" I mumbled. I felt the blush flood my face, and a lump rise in my throat.

Realisation set in on his face.

"I... Huh... What? Explain, please?"

"I'm going to tell you everything. Every last detail, I swear. Please, don't freak out, Jake, or be offended. I've been so selfish, but I'm glad I was. Because otherwise we would have happened"

"I promise."

I took a deep breath, then began to explain.

"I realised something on top of the cliffs today. I finally realised that he, that... Edward, isn't coming back. Not now, not ever."

Jacobs face fell, and he moved to comfort me.

"No, no, Jake. I'm not sad. I'm relieved. I know it's sounds stupid, but I didn't realise that up until this afternoon, how much I had been clinging to the hope that he would come back for me. That he'd show up at my door and tell me how much of a mistake he'd made, and that he loved me. And everyday it hasn't happened it made me hope harder and harder, and the more I hoped the more I struggled to live my life. For so long I've not been able to do anything, anything at all that deep down I didn't believe would somehow lead me to him."

"No Bella, you're wrong. What about the motorbikes? The cliff diving? They had nothing to do with him. You were getting better, everyday."

I shook my head and smiled a sad little smile

"No Jake. I found whenever I did anything... reckless, anything that got adrenaline pumping round my system, I could... I could, well, I could hear his voice. In my head. Telling me not to, telling me he cared."

I couldn't look Jake in the eye. I felt his knuckles tighten under my finger tips and his body shook, ever so slightly. I waited for him to calm down and then carried on.

"But today I realised that it's never going to happen. I'll never be that happy again, because he isn't coming back. Jake, I will always love him. He was my whole life. But that was then. This is my new life, and the only way I can be happy is to work with what I've got."

"So what, you're saying I'll do. That you're settling with me?" He spat the words out, disgusted. His face was twisted into a mask of pain and anger and he pulled his hands from under mine. How could he think that he meant so little?

"No! This isn't me settling, you've got it wrong. You are perfect for me in the world I thought I lived in, Jake. The world without magic and legends, vampires and werewolves. And I've already tried my life out in the world of magic, and you might of noticed, it didn't turn out so well." I could hear the note of hysteria rising in my voice. I was thinking about him too much. I had to make Jake understand. I took a deep breath to steady me, and then continued. "So, I'm starting things over again. Jacob, you are not my settling. You're my second chance."

And then, before I could explain to him the rest, before I could say another word, he was by my side, my face in his hands.

"I love you too," he whispered.

Then he kissed me.