I do not own Naruto. If I did, there would be an arc, in the manga AND anime, in which Naruto was stuck in his 'Sexy Jutsu' form. X3
I'm not sure of exactly how this story is going to go. I do know, however, that it will be longer than Miss Uncongeniality. After all, it will go through not only the entirety of Part I and Part II, but it will also go through things PRIOR to the beginning of the series, will focus on the characters more, etc. Also, I'm a bit more inspired for this one than for Miss Uncongeniality. Of course, that does not mean I'm going to stop writing Miss Uncongeniality. Miss Uncongeniality will be finished before For Want of a Nail. Just saying I have more...solid ideas for this one. My writing improves the more that I do it. My style shifts a bit, evolves. So, we'll take this little journey together, alright? Also, expect me to use alot of tropes in this. Go to to see what I mean. 'For Want of a Nail' is a trope itself. Also, expect some Lampshade Hanging, Crowning Moments of Awesome, Shout Outs, and Pre Asskicking One Liners, among other things...basically, it might very well be 'Troperific.' Not to mention references to meme's...like the one early in this chapter...I apologize for it.
Also, this is important: I'm bumping ages up. Naru and the others will be sixteen when they graduate the Ninja Academy. I have a good reason for this...So now, let's step into the first true chapter of For Want of a Nail...which, by the way, had no beta, so please try not to get too upset with any mistakes. I type fast...
Welcome To My Life
}November 29th{
A nine-year-old girl with long, fiery red hair, deep violet eyes, and a sweet, honest face, though with strange whisker-like scars on her cheeks, was racing through the streets of Konoha, bursting with laughter. There were many things that one would assume upon seeing this. One would expect she was just a child being silly, or perhaps playing a game. One would not expect she was being chased by a mob of people who were all splattered with bright red paint. Put these things together, and one person came to mind.
Naru Uzumaki, Konoha's 'Number One Unpredictable Girl,'[1] also referred to as Konoha's 'Number One Hyperactive Knucklehead.' Then again, calling someone like her a knucklehead, when she rather easily made fools out of others, indicated that the people she made fools out of were not exactly intelligent. She certainly was hyperactive, however, and most definitely unpredictable. Either way, she was a very...interesting person.
Naru had her long hair pulled back into a ponytail, though with locks of hair hanging in the front, framing her face, held in place by a hair clip and a pair of goggles worn like a hairband. She wore a brown, short sleeved parka with a red swirl over her heart, and black shorts. She had bandages around her right knee, the standard sandals, a thin, black, cloth belt around her waist, and black wristbands.[2]
Naru turned a corner, and skidded to a halt, eyes widening. She'd run into a dead end. She didn't really think that the victims of her prank would hurt her, despite their obvious dislike of her - which was part of why she pranked them to begin with - but she still didn't want to get caught. Well, she may not be a ninja, or even a ninja-in-training, but she still wasn't helpless, not with how well she knew the village, and how good she was at running...
The people at the front of the 'angry mob' turned into the alley in time to see Naru running full speed at the back wall, and then up. She couldn't defy gravity, nor could she use chakra properly, but she was, well, quite agile. She ran a short distance up the wall, then kicked off, twisting in the air as she did, before planting her feet on the shoulders of the man at the front of the group, only to then take off, using people's heads and shoulders as stepping stones.
Of course, the villager's weren't stupid, and were not about to let her escape like that. However, Naru expected them to try and stop her, so she changed tactics rather quickly. She leapt to the side as someone made a grab for her, catching a windowsill and pulling herself up a bit, and then leapt away from the wall, turned in the air, and caught a pipe travelling up along the other wall. She scrambled up the pipe to the roof, turning to look at the villagers.
"Ha! Catch me now, idiots!" She stuck her tongue out at them, ignoring their angry shouts, before grinning and folding her hands behind her head and turning to walk away...only to bump into a solid body that felt more like a brick wall. She paused, then looked up, immediately getting rather fidgety, letting out a nervous chuckle. "Eh, ah...h-hey, Kakashi-nii..." She tried to look as sweet as possible, while Kakashi just gave her an annoyed, yet slightly amused look.
"Naru...I thought I told you it wasn't the best of ideas to keep pulling these pranks." Kakashi just watched the slightly ashamed and apologetic look appear on her face, and sighed. Ever since a little incident that occurred recently, he'd taken to watching out for Naru, and she, in turn, had taken to referring to him as a brother. Which eventually resulted in...well, him having some trouble being stern with her. He refused to admit she'd become someone precious to him, however.
"Kakashi-nii, they deserved it! That one guy wouldn't let me in the store, and called me a brat before throwing me out!" Well, seemed the 'apologetic' phase was over. She had her arms crossed and had this adorable pout on her face that almost made Kakashi drop the act of being upset with her. He'd found the prank funny. However...
"Care to explain why you hit everyone in the store with that paint-bomb then?" He expected her to stumble a bit over that one, but she surprisingly just answered without hesitation.
"Because they were agreeing with him! One even said I should be thrown out of the village!" Kakashi's frown deepened, though Naru wouldn't see it, really, due to his mask. She was starting to recognize the subtle signs by his single visible eye and the set of his jaw, though. She really was smarter than anyone gave her credit for. "I saw that! You don't like it either! So I got back at them for being mean! I'm blameless!" Well, that was debatable, but Naru still made a point.
Kakashi began thinking about things, wondering whether people would ever accept Naru, when she decided to speak up, tugging on his pants. "Kakashi-nii, I have a question! I've been wondering, why do you hide your face and your left eye?" Kakashi blinked, looking down at Naru, raising an eyebrow. "Please tell me, Kakashi-nii? I really wanna know!" Kakashi took one look at her pleading face, and sighed.
"My left eye can turn people to stone and I can shoot an energy beam from my mouth." Despite how smart Naru could be, she could also be ridiculously gullible, as her eyes widened and she got excited, hopping up and down.
"Really! That's so cool! Can I see!" Kakashi almost felt bad for tricking her like this, and he knew she'd eventually figure out he was lying...well, she probably would...but this was amusing.
"No, sorry kid, can't do it. It's far too dangerous." He turned, and started walking away, knowing Naru would follow. And she did.
"Well, wait! Ano...OH! Can you tell me what it's called! The name of the energy beam attack!" She was hopping around him rather hyper-actively, and Kakashi chuckled a bit, amused. Then he said the first thing that came to mind.
"Shoop Da Whoop no Jutsu."[3] He then cringed. Maybe he should have thought about it for a moment, even Naru couldn't possibly believe-
"AWESOME! I wanna learn it!" Okay, maybe Naru actually would believe it...of course, this made a huge opening to mess with Naru, and Kakashi was going to take it.
"...Alright, but this is a...Quadruple S-Rank Jutsu, so don't expect to learn it quickly, okay? You have to just keep trying." Naru instantly agreed, nodding so fast that Kakashi vaguely wondered if her head would fall off. "...Okay, this jutsu doesn't use hand-seals. You just gather chakra while saying..." He paused, thinking, then smirked. "...I mean shouting, 'IMMA CHARGIN' MAH LAZER'. Got that?"
"..That's a really strange thing to say, Kakashi-nii...and a weird way to say it, too...but I guess that's 'cause it's so powerful!" Kakashi tried not to laugh at this, instead going on with his 'explanation'.
"Well, once you've built up the chakra, you shout 'IMMA FIRIN' MAH LAZER' and open your mouth wide, releasing the chakra. Simple as that. So...go practice, but make sure nobody is around, so you don't hurt them on accident." Naru immediately latched onto Kakashi, hugging him tightly, before running off.
"I'll master that jutsu and become a great ninja like you, Kakashi-nii, just you wait!" She soon disappeared, and Kakashi shook his head, chuckling. He knew she was going to be pissed when she figured out he'd tricked her, but it was worth it. He stuffed his hands in his pockets as he started walking again, planning to visit the Memorial Stone, yet thinking about Naru. Or, more precisely, the incident that resulted in their current relationship as 'siblings'...
}About One Month Before: October 10th{
Naru giggled a bit as she sat in her relatively new apartment, provided by the Third Hokage, devouring a bowl of instant ramen as she waited for the old man to arrive. It was her birthday, and the venerable old Hokage had promised to come over to celebrate it with her. She also hoped that she would finally meet the person who kept leaving her gifts, but never stuck around so she could meet them. She giggled again, then gasped as someone pounded on the door.
She paused, then hopped up, excited. She figured they pounded on the door because they were just as excited as her about her birthday. She flung the door open, then paused. Why was there a strange old man at her door, looking sick? He was swaying slightly and smelled odd to her. The man was drunk, but Naru didn't realize that. She had just turned nine, after all. "Hey, mister, are you here for my birthday?" The man just grunted, then lurched forward.
Kakashi twirled the goggles he'd gotten for Naru around his index finger lazily as he made his way to her apartment. He'd been leaving gifts for her ever since her first birthday, he felt he owed it to the daughter of his sensei, but had been unable to bring himself to meet her. It was a simple matter for someone of his skills, leaving presents for a child without getting caught. He knew from the Sandaime that Naru wanted to meet him, but he just didn't feel it was the best idea.
As he started up the stairs to her apartment, however, he noticed the door was wide open, and there were sounds of a struggle. Kakashi instantly shot up the stairs and into the apartment, eyes widening a bit. Naru was trying to push away a rather old man who smelled strongly of alcohol. The man seemed to be trying to strangle her, but was a little too drunk to manage it, thankfully. Kakashi immediately pulled the man away from Naru, and dragged him outside.
Once there, he let out a whistle, summoning the ANBU to take the man away for questioning. The man might get off lightly if the attack was fueled by the alcohol. Kakashi went back inside to find Naru hiding under the covers of her bed, shaking. He sighed heavily, and walked over, sitting down on the edge of the bed and pulling the sheet away. "Come on, kid, he's gone now, and I'm not gonna hurt you." Naru looked up at him slightly, knowing he was the one who helped her.
"...He kept saying it was my fault...he said I killed his daughter...I...don't remember doing anything..." Kakashi let out another sigh, knowing what this was about now. The villagers didn't like Naru, but had never before tried to actually hurt her. Apparently, a grieving, drunk old man was the exception. Best to fix this now, before Naru started blaming herself for something she had nothing to do with.
"Listen, ignore him. I can honestly say that you have never once hurt anyone, ever. That man had been drinking, and wasn't thinking straight. He thought you were someone else, so don't let it get to you." He paused, thinking, then sighed before holding out the goggles he'd brought along. "Here, happy birthday." Naru blinked, startled, taking the goggles, before giving Kakashi an odd look. After a moment, however, realization dawned on her, and she suddenly hugged him tightly.
"It's you! You're the one who kept leaving me gifts, aren't you!" Kakashi chuckled a bit, and nodded, causing her to giggle and hug him tighter. "I knew it! I finally get to meet you!" She just kept hugging him for a bit, then suddenly pulled away, looking up at him. "Hey, what's you're name, nii-chan?" Kakashi blinked, startled by the name. That was quite unexpected...but he found that he didn't really mind it that much.
"Kakashi Hatake...and can you not call me nii-chan? The -chan part's a bit...eh."
"Alright, Kakashi-nii!" Kakashi couldn't help but smile. There was just something about Naru that he liked. Not to mention she was the only child of his sensei... "Hey, wanna play a game, Kakashi-nii!" When the Sandaime arrived, it was to see Kakashi looking thouroughly confused, trying to find Naru in a game of 'Stealth'. The old Hokage would never let Kakashi live that one down. Ever.
}October 10th, 2 Years later{
Naru had been better. Her birthdays had been the best days of her life, thanks to the Sandaime and Kakashi-nii, but...well, this year, the old man was busy and Kakashi-nii was out on a mission. To make things worse, she'd started at the Ninja Academy recently, and all the students, and even some of the teachers, either ignored her or insulted her. Why people treated her this way, she didn't know, but she was determined to earn their respect one day...but for now...
She sat down on a bench in the small park in the village, biting her lip. She had to admit, things were starting to get to her. Kakashi-nii wasn't able to be around often, and the Sandaime obviously was busy most of the time. She had no friends, and it was, well, hard to deal with. So, she eventually developed a habit to cheer herself up, or at least occupy her time. Namely, she would sing.[4] She paused, and began to sing.
[5]"All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
And their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head, I want to drown my sorrows
No tomorrow, no tomorrow"
"And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very, very
Mad world
Mad world"
"Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And they feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello, teacher, tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me"
"And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very, very
Mad world
Mad world
Mad world
Mad world"
She lowered her head, staring at the ground, feeling actually more depressed. Sure, dreams of death were not the best she had, but everything else in the song pretty much fit. Also, on her bad days, she did, sometimes, wonder if it would be better to just die. However, it was at those points that she'd think of the Hokage and Kakashi, and the fact that if she died, it would hurt them. That thought reminded her that she had people who cared about her, and it would cheer her right up.
"Well, that was a pretty depressing song, don't you think?" Naru jumped at the sound of the voice, looking around to spot an older girl wearing a sleeveless pink blouse and dark green pants, with a bandage wrapped around her right thigh over the pants, along with a shuriken holster. She had brown eyes and hair, which was drawn back into two buns. Naru thought she looked like a panda, but wasn't about to say that.
"Ano...who...are you?" Naru was confused, wondering why this older girl, who really seemed to be only a year older at the most, was not only talking to her, but smiling. The girl walked over, and sat down on the bench next to Naru, still smiling.
"My name is Tenten. You?"
"...Naru Uzumaki...what's your last name?"
"Don't have one. I'm an orphan."[6] Tenten said this with no hesitation, and was just leaning back, kicking her feet a bit. Naru blinked, seeming confused.
"Well...I'm an orphan too, but I still have a last name..."
"Well, nobody knew the last name of either of my parents for some reason. There are a couple possibilities, but they aren't sure which family that died was mine. They just knew my name because they found me in a crib in the house with my name on it." Naru frowned a bit, feeling a bit guilty for bringing something like that up, but before she could apologize, Tenten continued. "It's okay though. I know they loved me. They died in the Kyuubi attack. Your parents too, right?" Naru just nodded. That's what she'd been told. "Figured...so, what's with the sad song?"
"...I...I'm just lonely, I guess...nobody wants to be friends with me...the teachers don't seem to like me, the old man is busy, and Kakashi-nii is on a mission..." Here, Tenten blinked. She'd heard that name before.
"Kakashi? Like, Kakashi Hatake? The Kakashi Hatake?" Naru just nodded, smiling a bit. "He's your brother!" Here Naru paused, and shook her head.
"Well, no, not really. I just consider him to be like my brother, and he seems to like it when I call him that..." Tenten seemed surprised, then impressed, and then just confused again.
"Alright, so...who's the 'old man'?"
"The Hokage." That floored Tenten, but she managed not to act too surprised, even though on the inside she was freaking out. Just who was this Naru girl?
"Wow, that's...really cool, Naru...how can you be so close to one of the most powerful shinobi in the village, and the Hokage?"
"I'm not sure...they've both just always been there, though Kakashi-nii just secretly gave me birthday presents until I was nine..." This, of course, reminded her of part of why she was depressed, and her smile fell a bit. Tenten noticed, of course.
"Hey, come on...they'll be around, you know. They can't be there all the time, obviously. What's a day or two without them around?"
"...But...they've always been with me on my birthday..." Tenten winced a bit at that. It was her birthday? And she was alone? Well, that wasn't going to work for her. She stood up, and moved in front of Naru, before holding her hand out to her. Naru seemed confused, blinking and cocking an eyebrow. "...What?" Tenten just rolled her eyes, laughing.
"Just come with me. You're in the Ninja Academy, right?" Naru nodded, and Tenten grinned. "Well, why don't you join me? I'm gonna do some training, so lets train together! Besides, I'm sure you would benefit from training with me. It's my dream to be as strong as Lady Tsunade, one of the Sannin!"
"The Sannin? Who are they?" Naru's question shocked Tenten even more than news that the girl was close to Kakashi and the Hokage, and the older girl immediately leaned in.
"You don't know! The Sannin are legendary ninja, more powerful than even the Hokage! They were trained by him! Lady Tsunade is the granddaughter of the Shodaime, grand niece of the Nidaime, and the most powerful kunoichi ever!"[7] Naru's eyes were wide by the time Tenten finished, and she stood as well.
"Wow...she sounds amazing...it's your dream to be as strong as her?" Tenten nodded firmly, and Naru smiled, holding up her fist. "Then that'll be my second dream, too!"
"Second dream? What's your first?" Naru just placed her hands on her hips, giving Tenten a cocky grin.
"My dream is to be Hokage! Then everyone will finally respect me, and I can protect everyone in the village!" Tenten blinked in response, then threw her arm around Naru's shoulders, grinning as well.
"Well, let's go then! Let's you and me work together! We'll become the two strongest kunoichi, and show the boys that we can be just as good as them, if not better!" Naru nodded firmly, and the two took off, Tenten leading the way.
"...This is your house? Are you serious!" Naru was looking up at the large building in awe, Tenten smirking a bit. It wasn't a mansion, but it was like one in miniature. It was quite similar in design to a Chinese pagoda, and as such was very different than the other homes nearby. They were in one of the more wealthy districts of the village, so all the houses were rather large, but Tenten's was definitely unique. Tenten led the way inside, and Naru noticed that the style of the inside matched the outside, all the way down to the decorations.
Tenten seemed to know what Naru was thinking, and chuckled a bit. "My parents seemed to have a thing for this style. Even the clothing." Naru glanced over at Tenten, paused, then nodded. It would certainly explain Tenten's choice in clothing. Tenten unlocked the door, then motioned for Naru to follow. "Come on, I'll show you around before we do any training." This of course caused Naru to blink in confusion. She stepped inside, Tenten closing the door behind her, before voicing her thoughts.
"Ano...why would you show me around your house? It's not like I'd gonna be doing anything other than training, so why would I need to know where things are?" Tenten raised an eyebrow in confusion of her own.
"Well I'm sure we'll be hanging out too. That's what friends do." To Tenten, that was just how it was. As such, she did not expect Naru's surprised face, followed by the younger girl nearly tackling her to the ground as she hugged her. "Gah! Naru, what the...what did I say to make you so happy?"
"I finally have a friend!" Naru's voice was filled with joy and she had on the biggest grin Tenten had ever seen. She figured Naru may even be able to give that strange Jounin she'd seen running around the village, in green spandex for some reason, a run for his money when it came to overly large grins. Tenten just stood there for a moment in surprise, then returned the hug, smiling warmly.
"Heh, come on Naru, I'll show you around, then we'll go start training, yeah? I'll even show you some cool tricks that I learned from scrolls my parents left behind!" She put her arm around Naru's shoulders, grinning even more at Naru's ecstatic expression.
"What? Really! That's so cool! ...But, is that really okay? I mean, wouldn't that make them, like, clan techniques?"
"I don't think they are, but if they are, well, it's still my decision since I'm the only one left. From what one of the instructors told me when I talked to him about it though, it seems that it's just expanding on techniques that already exist." Naru seemed to think on Tenten's words for a moment.
"Really? Huh...well, guess that means it's okay! So, what are you gonna teach me?"
"Well, let me ask you, Naru...have you ever heard of sealing and summoning things out of scrolls? Like, for example...lots and lots of weapons?" At Naru's confused look and the shaking of her head, Tenten smirked. "Well, then this is gonna really make you excited. See, I can..."[8]
Kakashi Hatake felt a chill run down his spine. He had a feeling that something very bad was going to happen very soon. He started to wonder if his feeling was deserved when Naru leapt out of the tree's to land in front of him. He would have questioned why they were both in the Forest of Death if he wasn't so startled by her leap. She shouldn't be able to do that yet. "Naru? How did you-"
"You lied to me! There was no such thing as 'Shoop Da Whoop no Jutsu!" Kakashi sweatdropped, visible eye drooping a bit. It took her two years to figure that out? He was suddenly worried about her level of intelligence, when he noticed something she'd said.
"Hm? Naru, you said 'was no such thing.' What do you mean 'was'?" The sudden smirk on her face was slightly unnerving. Particularly when she planted her feet and began to gather her chakra...alot of it.
"IMMA CHARGIN' MAH LAZER!" Kakashi's single eye widened in shock as he felt the chakra pouring off of Naru in waves. How was that possible for an eleven year old! When Naru closed her eyes, he pushed his headband up to reveal his Sharingan, using it to analyze Naru. What he discovered shocked him even more.
'That...all that chakra! How is this possible! Even I don't have that much! Could it be...could it be the Nine-Tails?' Naru's eyes snapped open as she hunched forward.
"IMMA FIRIN' MAH LAZER!" She took a deep breath, and Kakashi's Sharingan caught the gathering of a mass amount of chakra in Naru's lungs, throat, and mouth. And then he noticed something else.
'Wait a second...is she aiming at me!'
"BWAG!" A beam of pure energy suddenly shot toward Kakashi, who's eyes widened in fear as he realized he couldn't possibly dodge in time. Kakashi screamed in pain as the beam engulfed him, tearing his body apart bit by bit...
...And then then he continued to scream as he fell over backward out of the tree he'd been napping in. When he finally calmed down, he just stared up at the night sky from his position on his back on the ground. "...Thank Kami nobody was around to see that..."
He'd clearly forgotten that he was on this mission with one Mitarashi Anko, who suddenly found she couldn't hold back her laughter anymore. As soon as she started, Kakashi groaned and palmed his face. "Fuck..."[9]
[1] Cause she's not even in the Ninja Academy yet in this story, obviously, so she's not a ninja/kunoichi.
[2] I decided on a basic look for her when I first got the idea for this story, but then I found some pictures that PERFECTLY fit the way I envisioned her looking. You can find a picture of Naru on my profile.
[3] ...I had to do it, I'm sorry. And this joke will be referenced again, in a funny way. So it's a set-up for another joke.
[4] Naruto as a guy...probably had a bad singing voice. But Naru has a good voice. Cause I say she does...*sticks tongue out*
[5] This song is Mad World, a version sung by Alex Parks. You can find a link to the song on my profile.
[6] They never give Tenten any backstory, nor a last name. So, I'm creating one for her. A backstory, I mean.
[7] Tsunade's relationship to the Shodaime and Nidaime are fact, everything about strength is Tenten's opinion, though she could very well be right.
[8] I'm sure everyone can see where this is going. Naru, summoning weapons like Tenten does. However, Naru obviously won't do it the way Tenten does, nor will she be as skilled with as many weapons as Tenten is. That doesn't mean that Naru won't pull some crazy-ass shit though...
[9] This, faithful readers, is a brick joke. You thought that the 'Shoop Da Whoop' thing was a one time joke, but it clearly wasn't. It was introduced at the beginning of the chapter, and then brought in at the end for a cheap laugh. It will continue to pop up, but in a new form: Anko teasing Kakashi about falling out of a tree screaming. Cause I mean, seriously, that's something she would do.
Alright, the first chapter of 'For Want of a Nail' is done! Yay! This took for-fucking-ever because of a lack of time and inspiration, as well as continued home issues. However, I feel things turned out well enough...anyway, next chapter, Naru gains some new friends, Kakashi continues to suffer thanks to a silly prank he pulled on Naru, and Naru meets some people she'd rather forget...among other things. Stay tuned! ...Wait, how does one 'stay tuned' when it comes to reading? ...Huh...
In this fic, pick the guy you want Naru paired with. Whichever ONE character gets the most votes, is the one Naru will eventually fall in love with. Everyone else will just get some nice scenes. Each voter gets two votes. Use 'em well.
(in no particular order)
1. Gaara
2. Sasuke
3. Neji
4. Kiba
5. Shikamaru
