A/N: Man, these sure as hell appear short. I can't belive that! Oh well. This one is again Allen, where he speaks about his job. I hope this one came out better looking and more... spizzaz? Go me, I just made up another word... any ways, this was encouraged COMPLETELY by a street festival that happened recently. I must say that I greatly enjoy their performances!
seasnake.752:Yo, whats up? Anyways thanks much. I'm all over the place when I write so I'm glad you enjoyed it!
pika138:Whoa, thanks! You should here me talk then... it's almost as if English is my second language... thanks for the encouragement!
DarkDragonRhapsody: Thanks you very much -bows-
LonelyKitty: Hi's Thanks for reviewing like always and I had a great time. Also thanks for the encouragement and I try to take new approaches and new ideas...
Title
Happy Job
These days I often catch myself thinking of my past. Of how much things have changed and how my views have changed so much. I've never had what most people would call a 'normal' childhood, but I loved it regardless. I was able to see the harsh reality of the world when I was young, but, I also got another chance of happiness. Another chance through Mana.
Hehe, this must sound so strange to you but this is just how I am. And I'll properly always be this way. Just a scramble of incomplete thoughts as I struggle through this life.
Komui, he once told me that god must truly love me because I was able to come back. Now stronger than ever. But don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. If anything I'm thankful for another chance that I seem to always get. But, Gods love is so cruel. It's through his love that I seem to always survive, coming back a little more broken. It's like it's his own way of making a child into his soldier. Into his weapon.
My arm has already become another part of me. Influencing my thoughts and my actions. Who is saying that I'm not a weapon already? I fight, I kill, and I destroy. That's all that happens. Even if I think I am saving people, that can't possibly be true. All I'm saving are the deceased. There is no sympathy for the dead however, so there is no real salvation.
These thoughts have begun to linger a bit too much these days. Wait, I think I just killed another akuma… Whoa, I'm not even realizing that I'm fighting anymore.
Here I am, fighting for the good of mankind that has created me. Their little weapon of salvation for the dead. There may be no sympathy for the dead, but there is even less for me.
When Mana was still around, I often questioned our work. We would go around entertaining people. I often thought that we should be doing more for the people. For those who couldn't help themselves. I asked Mana this once and he laughed at me. He told me that I still have a lot of growing up to do and to enjoy what I had while it lasted.
And I did and still do.
For me, those days are truly sacred, precious. We would wonder through towns, showing of our tricks and stunts through tons of different acts. We never asked for a penny. Not once. All we asked for was a smile, to show that we have done our job right. I would juggle while balancing on top of a ball; Mana would pull a rabbit out of his hat. We would dress up like clowns and make funny faces at
little children. We would juggle and dance. Do magic and sing. We did all we could to earn those smile of the people.
I still remember every smile that I had ever gotten. Those were more important to me than money we got from the kind donators. One time I tried refusing some pennies from a little girl. Telling her that she had already paid me with her smile. She laughed and told me that that's why she was giving me the money. Because she said that our performance was worth more than her smile. In truth I blushed and thanked her greatly for the money.
When I found Mana, he too had some money. He laughed quietly and he told me that people don't seem to understand the term free entertainment. I laughed too.
Another time, a man was giving me and Mana a lot of money. We tried to refuse but he just sighed and pushed it into our hands.
"You should accept what people give you. Don't see it as payment, but as a gift from me to you. I don't know about you, but I feel bad when people refuse gifts from me." Once he spoke that, he left. Mana and I discussed about his weird action long after he left. Mana put a smile on his face and said that he would enjoy his little 'gift' to its fullest. I laughed and agreed.
Often I see little kids, running around having fun and I think of those stupid thoughts I had. That I should be doing something for everyone. Hell, what was wrong with my old job? Sure I didn't save lives or whatever, but I was able to make people smile. I was able to make them forget about this hell and truly be able to embrace life.
Now, I save people, I'm that hero that I always wanted to be. But now I don't get a penny, I don't get a smile. All I get are fearful faces. Everyone terrified of me. Of gods weapon.
Hehe, pathetic really. On how a simple job such as making people smile, felt some much more meaningful than this job meant to save their lives. How I wish I could go back to being a child, instead of this weapon.
Oh, I just killed another akuma. No smile, no penny.
