Sitting in the orphanage office, Snape shifted uncomfortably. He'd gotten permission from Voldemort, and had with him Bellatrix, much to his displeasure. They had been bickering back and forth all day about who was going to be the child's guardian.
"I still don't see why you get to adopt a snot-nosed brat instead of someone more capable, like a woman," sniffed Bellatrix.
"Probably because I don't call children snot-nosed brats," replied Snape in the driest of tones. "Besides, do you know how to deal with children?"
"No, and why would I? Why should it matter?" snapped Bella.
"Because we need this child to like us," replied he in the most patient of tones. His patience was wearing thin, and soon he would break her wand off in her ass if things didn't happen quickly. "You heard what I said to our Dark Lord, the child will be my ward, and must be made to think of me as a trustworthy companion."
"Then why are you bringing it to Hogwarts on your undercover missions?"
"Because I need to earn this child's trust. Besides, this child, a girl, I believe, will be well looked after by the staff while I infiltrate and gain the trust of, Albus Dumbledore, something none of the others are capable of. Dumbledore would see right through anything, but due to my unique set of skills-" She snorted at this. "he seems to be willing to give me a chance. The Dark Lord knows this, and if he thought of someone more qualified, do you not think he would have sent them instead of me?"
"Well, he chose me as your accomplice, did he not? Surely that must mean you're not entirely trusted."
Snape smirked, remembering the conversation he'd had with Voldemort.
"Please, just take her with you and get her out of here, for my sanity. She's a valuable asset, but Merlin's holy manhood does she talk," Voldemort said. Nagini hissed in agreement, brushing against her master briefly.
Snape tried not to smile, letting a miniscule smirk escape. "Of course, my Lord," he replied, trying not to laugh.
"Oh, the Dark Lord has plans for you yet, don't you worry your precious head about anything," Snape said. Their conversation was cut short as a portly Muggle worker waddled into the office. "Hello, I'm Severus Snape, and this is my, er..." They exchanged glances. To be called a pair would be both an insult and disturbing, while to be called friends would be flat-out lying. "...neighbor." Bellatrix gave the tiniest of nods. "Bellatrix. I asked her to come with me because I'd like to adopt one of your children. I've heard that you have a child who is causing problems?"
"Oh, oh yes, of course, Mr. Snape," said the woman. Snape tried not to cringe, grinding his teeth for a brief moment. "Right this way." She lead them down a long corridor into a large rectangular room with flat grey walls and identical cribs. Children one year and younger were lined up in the miniature prisons. One girl in particular seemed fascinated with the bars of her cage. The next thing they knew, the girl was on the floor and crawling around. There was no damage done to the bars. Acting on instinct, Snape cast a memory modifying spell then went over and ripped a bar off, dropping it to the floor before scooping up the child.
"Is this the girl I've heard about?" he asked as the spell took over the woman. She would remember the child pushing the bars to breaking point and the bar falling to the floor, little girl tumbling out afterward.
The woman blinked twice. "Oh, yes, this is her. Her name is Tabitha, or so the note she was left with says. She was left on our doorstep Christmas Eve, so we've taken to saying that is her birthday," she said. "Are you sure you want her? The other children are far better behaved, and won't destroy your home."
"Yes, I'm sure." He smiled gently at the child, who cooed up at him. "She'll be a perfect addition to my household."
"Great! I'll bring you into a quiet side room to fill out the forms." They followed her into the room and Snape passed his young charge to Bellatrix, who awkwardly held the child in what could be considered a strangle-hold position. He filled out the forms and signed at the bottom before taking the now struggling baby from Bellatrix, who gladly passed her back.
"Thank you for this opportunity," Bellatrix threw over her shoulder as they left.
Albus, if she proves to be a pain-in-the-ass handful, I'm going to torture you and enjoy it, Snape thought.
