Intriguing; that was a word Sheldon could use to define his blonde secretary.

… Tantalizing could work, too. Actually, it described her perfectly—she was something that he couldn't have and that tormented him every single day. From the first day that he saw her in the board room where they conducted her interview at (she lookrd so cheerful and optimistic that it actually made him wonder what exactly was so great about the situation) to this very day where he would sneak a glance at her when she wasn't looking.

There was just… something about her that drew him to her. Obsessed was a strong word, but he had to admit that that was what he was to her—well, he preferred the word 'fixated' as that sounded less negative. It was as if he was a magnet that quickly attaches to a piece of metal nearby.

And he didn't like that. Not one bit.

But what could he do? He didn't want to be fixated on her—especially with there being several other better things to be fixated on—and never had any intentions of even hiring her! If it weren't for Howard and Raj's prodding, he never would have agreed to even meeting her. Based on her resume alone, she clearly wasn't qualified to be his secretary.

That was actually the main reason why he had yet to do anything about his fixation with her—her annoying quirks that were too blatant to ignore. Like her irritating habit of calling him boss or Mr. Cooper instead of Doctor like she should. She even had the audacity to call him Sheldon sometimes, as if she was on his level!

There's also her infuriating quirk of talking loud while on the phone; going on various social media sites when there was work to be done, making her station (and the front of his office) a pig sty and doing her nails—all during office hours! It was as if she didn't even want to do her job.

Regardless of all of that, he still could not the state he caught her in nearly a week ago. That was the curse of having an eidetic memory; everything was so vivid and hard to ignore. Each time he saw her, all he could see was how she writhed in his chair—said chair was now being avoided by him because he wasn't that obsessed—and whenever she spoke, all he heard was how breathless she was as she moaned.

The image popped into his mind every single time he needed to concentrate on something and it was getting so distracting that he was willing to do anything just to keep his mind away from it. He simply could not afford to get an erection while he spoke to the head of an international medical equipment company who was talking about a joint venture while his mind replayed Penny masturbating again and again and again.

Because of that, he had to do something he strongly disliked; he went on the dates that Raj set up for him.

Going on dates with various didn't really clear his mind of Penny (his mind went on Penny mode whenever there was silence between him and his date) but it did help with him thinking of something other than her. Like how his date chewed too loudly, or how her laugh was too annoyingly high pitched.

He'd punish Penny for making him go through this hell, but that would mean him revealing what he saw to her. And he was not good with confrontations. Or telling people how he felt. Or having to admit that he really was affected by such carnal things and that yes, he had a deal and that he (like normal males) did get aroused because—surprise, surprise!—he was not a robot.

If he had a rare comic book for each time that someone thought he was some kind of robot, he would have a complete collection of collectibles by now.

… And he did.

"—so, like, my friend was totally—you're not gonna believe this!drunk and, like, punched the guy!"

Sheldon resisted the urge to just get up and leave as his date (#15; bottled blonde, brown eyes, roughly 5'4 sans heels and probably had her lips and chest done) went on and on about how her friend totally always made a scene when drunk. In comparison to the previous dates, this one was just so terrible that he was considering cutting Raj's salary. She was that bad.

"The guy she punched was cute, too!" She said as she took a sip from her wine glass. He was having milk. She was on her third glass of unreasonably priced fermented grape juice. "I mean, can you believe her?"

He stared blankly at her, considering his options. If he goes with what he really wants to do (leaving and going home) Raj would probably call him up again to whine about how he needs to stops insulting everyone. But, if he just pretends to care, she'll keep on blabbering about something and the night would eventually end with him saying goodbye and rushing home. "No, I can't."

Her dark eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a second before she started laughing, drawing the attention of some of the people eating near them. "Right?! Then there's this one time…"

Sheldon tuned her out from there and tried to think of what he could send his mother and grandmother. It had been a while since he sent them anything (he was busy with a lawsuit from someone saying that their new product cause him to get sick) and wanted to get them something nice. Penny probably knew something that would—

His mind suddenly switched to the sight of Penny in his office that night then to a mental image of her half naked; wearing one of his dress shirts with a seductive smirk on her face as she slowly made her way to him. She had her hair down—something she barely did at work—and he could smell her green apple shampoo that he loved so much.

Penny took one step closer before stopping and undoing the last few buttons on his shirt. He could feel his pants tighten as she shrugged his shirt off and placed a hand on his chest. She placed a hand on the side of his face before standing on her tiptoes and whispering, "come on, boss, what are you waiting for?—"

"—for? And I said, I was, like, waiting for you, you big dummy!" Her high pitched laugh snapped him out of his thoughts and suddenly made him aware of the growing erection in his pants.

Goddamn Penny and her stupid decision to masturbate in his office! If she had just behaved like someone who actually respected her boss, she wouldn't have the guts nor the decency to do that! If only he could fire her… no, he should! She was the worst secretary in the world who couldn't even get any work done, surely he could replace her!

But… Penny was actually the longest secretary he ever had. Most of them quit after a month of working for him. If she fired him, they'd have to go through the process of interviews all over again and he had not time for that tedious process again. That, and he didn't want her out of his sight. Who knows what she'd do if she lost her job. She'd probably become a waitress or something she would also fail at.

Wait, why was he thinking about her again?!

He glanced back down at his pants and cringed; he was slightly more aroused than he was a few seconds ago… by just thinking about his secretary. What was wrong with him?! He was a successful, powerful and intelligent man with an IQ of 187; he was not supposed to get aroused over—oh, there was no point of even trying to explain.

"I'm sorry, I have to leave," he stood, pulled his wallet out and placed money on the table. "It was somewhat pleasant to meet you."

His date's eyes grew wide with surprise and before she could say something stupid, he made his way out of the restaurant that Raj insisted him to go to. His date was probably calling Raj by now, but he could deal with that later. They were going to see each at work, anyway, so there was no point on even picking his call up.

He was going to some alone time to deal with his little problem.


Four days day and one 'session' later, he found a way to keep his mind off his secretary for at least a few minutes. All he had to do was think about comic books or either Star Wars or Star Trek and he would be able to clear his mind for a while. It wasn't much, but it would do for now.

"Hey boss," he glanced up from his paperwork and saw Penny standing at the door carrying a few folders. "Here are the things you asked me to do, right when you want them."

Superheroes that have names with the same first letter, he announced in his mind, avoiding his secretary's eyes and focusing on both the document he was reading and Superhero names. Fantastic Four and Sue Storm. "I'm surprised that you actually got that finished," he glanced the folders then turned back to the papers in front of him. "Are those all done? Every single one?"

"Uhh… well, about that…" Reed Richards, Victor Von Doom, Matt Murdoch. "I may have skipped a few things that I personally thought could be done at a later time. Like, uh, the one about how our rival companied are doing."

Multiple Man, Peter Parker, Bruce Banner. He took the folder, skimmed through it then out it back at the bin that sat at the corner of his desk. "No matter, I'll get Wolowitz to do that. He enjoys snooping around the rival companies and pretending that he's some sort of double agent."

"Great! That means that I can go home early right?"

He glanced up at her hopeful face then quickly returned to his paperwork. "No." Pepper Pots, Scott Summers, Happy Hogan—if he were to continue this while she was in front of him, he'd eventually run out of names because Penny was not moving. He glance up again. "Is there a problem?"

Penny raised her eyebrows then looked around his office. "Well, uh, I thought that you'd let me go home cause you might be doing… something?"

"Something?" He repeated in confusion.

She shrugged. "I don't know… like a date? Or something?"

"A date…? Why would I go on a date…" he thought for a moment before glancing at his phone that had a notification of his date with another one of Raj's friends. "Oh! Right! I do have a date later. Thank you for reminding me."

He sent Raj a confirmation text then went back to his paperwork. Surely after the several bad dates, Raj would have a decent friend for once. He decided that he'd stop agreeing to this once he got over the mental image of Penny pleasuring herself. He was actually doing better now—he hadn't thought of it since he left his home.

He wasn't sure if it was because of the dates, focusing on his hobbies or work but he didn't care as long as it worked. Maybe he was just too traumatized by the image popping up at the worst of times that he's somehow managed to control its frequency. It was just so nice to not get an erection while speaking to people.

"So…" he scowled as his secretary spoke again, "you're going on another date, huh. Who's the lucky girl this time, boss?"

"I thought you left," he calmly stated, signing his name on the designated area. "Don't you have other important things to do?"

A pair of hands landed on the opposite edge of his desk and he looked up to see her grinning down at him. He could see her cleavage from the way she bent down which made him blush slightly and stare back down at the documents in front of him. "Aww, come on! I'm your secretary! Shouldn't I know the person that you'll make me buy gifts for when it gets serious or something?"

"If I tell you, will you get back to work?" She nodded, but he had a feeling that this wouldn't end with him just telling her. He would never be able to understand gossip and what exactly was so interesting about it. "Her name is Alex, she has dark hair and is currently working on her Phd. There, are you happy now?"

Penny stared at him for a moment—probably trying to comprehend the fact that she had work to do—then dramatically slammed her (Nebraskan) hand on top of his desk. Just a little bit harder and his desk might have cracked. "Oh! Oh! That's the one you took to that fancy schmancy Japanese restaurant last week!"

What exactly was so interesting about that? "Yes… that's the one. I'm quite surprised that you even remembered that yet forgot that my burgers don't have tomatoes—now, are you done?"

There was this inquisitive glint in her eyes that confirmed his theory of this conversation being far from over. Perhaps if she annoyed him enough, his fixation with her would be replaced with pure hatred that could get him to fire her. That was possible. He had yet to get that mad at her, regardless of all her cons. His fixation with her was doing such a good job of getting in the way that he couldn't, unfortunately.

"We're talking about you; my antisocial, love and people hating boss going on a date; how can I not pry?!" As if that was an acceptable reason for someone to be nosy. "Anyway, I have no clue on what she looks like, but I guess she must be okay if you're going on a second date."

He hummed in thought as he pictured what his date look like. She was okay, he guessed. Howard would say that she was attractive and he didn't trust Raj's opinion as he thought that all of these friends of his were attractive—wait, why was he even wasting time on such a foolish thing?! "Are you done? We both have work to do."

She waved her hand dismissively and he briefly wondered if he should be offended that she took their work for granted. "The paperwork won't go anywhere, they can wait. This is way more important! Okay, does she look like Carrie Fisher or Natalie Portman or something? Or Zoe Saldana?"

Sheldon paused from flipping the next page of the contract he was reading and stared at her in confusion. How did she know about them? The last time he tried to talk to her about anything regarding science fiction, she flat out told him that she didn't like nerdy things! Was this some kind of alternate dimension where his Penny actually liked things that he liked?!

"Shocked, huh?" She let out a small chuckle before sending him a self satisfied smirk. "Well, I watched all of the Star Wars movies and the new Star Trek ones over the weekend cause I was so curious on why you love it so much. I'm even planning on watching the original series and the next generation one since you included that in my interview: Kirk or Picard, right?"

He was still staring at her and she shrugged in response. "I gotta admit, though, they're actually not half bad, boss. Harry Potter was actually the only fantasy thing that I liked—and Game of Thrones, but that's just cause of Jon Snow—but now I like those, too. So, thanks for the not-so-subtle suggestions that I watch them. I'm kinda hooked."

She actually watched them. After hundreds of attempts to get her to watch them, she finally did it. This might be the first time she ever did something that didn't lead to her muttering an insult under her breath or her simply not doing it. He would give her some chocolate if he had some. "How do I know that you're not lying?"

"Give me a test—but not one of those die hard fan tests, I'm not that obsessed. Something that can only be answered if you really watched them." She gave him a wink that only made him scowl even deeper; if that was possible.

"I might do that… after you've finished everything I asked you to do," he said, closing the folder he was reading and standing. "But, for now, since I'm in such a good mood, why don't you go home early? I'll just get Koothrappali to do the stocks report instead."

The blonde blinked at him. "Seriously?! I get to go home early?"

Sheldon nodded as he fixed his things. The image of her masturbating was slowly creeping into his mind and with what just happened, he was going to need some time alone to shake that out of his mind. Better to be safe than miserably trying to a raging boner from fifteen highly respected businessmen from various countries. "That's what I said. Please don't make me repeat myself."

"Oh my god, thanks! That means that I can get a massage or something!"

He was about to tell her that she still needed to finish everything else that wasn't the stocks report when he saw the bright smile that formed on her face. He had never seen her look so happy in the year that worked for him. It was always one of those forced ones that he gave her whenever he ordered her to do something or the sarcastic ones that he hated.

It was a really pleasant sight to see—if his mind hadn't reminded him that he had seen how she looked while she was pleasuring herself.

To hell with his eidetic memory. "Yes, well… good luck with that. Finish the rest of the paperwork I asked you to do and I'll see you on Monday." He gave her a strangled smile—she was still trying to process what was happening—then scurried out of his office.

This woman was going to be the death of him and he knew it.